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She's doing it Gollum/Smeagle style though: Op's mom: My precious *strokes* We will ruuullee *gollum cough that he does* YESSS my precious

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70-Gollum and Smeagle are the same person, so unless I totally missed something, it/they don't have a whole lot in common with Snape and Lily.

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Dude, first it's zombies in Miami and now mind controlling cats... What has this world come t- ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOCAT!

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Unrelated point I would like to make to number 3. Your profile says you are a garment nazi, yet you, yourself, suck at grammar. What you were describing is a spelling nazi. Don't worry, it's a common misconception.

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Is OP Obi Wan? I dont know, it seems more to me like OP is James Bond once again captured by Spectre and that OP's mom is Blofeld. O.o

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I don't know about you, but it sure aggravates my desire to take over the world. Just whets that appetite for evil!! Either that, or I become a kitty. Meow!

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Zombies! This is the beginning! Mynas were right! -hopes on spaceship and flys off to moon when FPSRussia has a secret base-

You better ask your mom if you can join that plan. It wouldn't be nice if you were ruled by a kitty. Oh and also, save a spot for me!

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I think being ruled by us would be very nice. Being massaged 24/7, laser pointers as entertainment, and Cat naps whenever and wherever you desire.

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Probably not, but good thinking. Women may become irrational during menopause but my guess is that this lady just wanted some love only a cat would display. If trying to avoid menopausal women at all costs, just steer clear of ones who are trying to fashion napkins into fans at the local air conditioned diner. Hot flashes can be nasty. Or so I'm told. :)

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Blood is thicker than water eh. By the way, I aspire to make it onto your list. Some day...

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The only way to make it onto Skoomaki's list is to viciously beat him into submission. Whips and chains, my friend. And a good firm hand.

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Well, one of the symptoms for schizophrenia IS delusions ("one day I will rule the earth!" or "I'm Batman") but I doubt OP's mom is schizo (I doubt she's truly having delusions, either, for that matter).. Honestly I say weird stuff to my cat all the time... >:) she was probably just listening to her voice and how it sounds when she says certain stuff :P

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