Love: Today, I took the day off work to be with my wife, since she's...

By boblaj - 22/05/2012 16:11 - United Kingdom - Hastings

Today, I took the day off work to be with my wife, since she's always bemoaning my lack of romantic gestures. As thanks, she spent most of the day reading Fifty Shades of Grey, which is basically a blatant plagiarism of Twilight, starring a pair of two-dimensional BDSM freaks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 856

You deserved it 4 028

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Same thing different taste

By fiftyno - 01/10/2012 15:02 - United States - Tacoma

Today, I came home to my wife practising biting her lip in the mirror. Fuck you, Fifty Shades of Grey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 843

You deserved it 4 122

By Divorce? - 29/07/2017 00:30

Today, I came home and caught my husband in a compromising position. He was watching Twilight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 014

You deserved it 599

By Anonymous - 20/08/2013 08:06 - United States - Gig Harbor

Today, I had to endure my girlfriend crying and screaming at me. The reason? I'm not able to please her like the fictional character Christian Grey in 50 Shades of Grey. When she left me, she took all her stuff and left me with copies of the 3 books. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 426

You deserved it 4 423

By I_dislike_Twilight - 08/09/2011 12:52 - United States

Today, my wife showed me what was missing in our marriage with a Twilight video montage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 391

You deserved it 4 700

They're still books, technically

By breakmyfall - 15/11/2020 02:02

Today, my brother's girlfriend came over to visit and we got to talking about books. Thinking she'd be interested, I suggested a few. She responded that she "only reads good literature." The only books I've ever seen her read are Fifty Shades of Gray and the Twilight saga. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 044

You deserved it 95

Affection breakdown

By Anonymous - 19/12/2020 13:02 - United Kingdom - Boston

Today, my wife can't be bothered to do anything that isn't work, talk about her work, and sit on the sofa. Then she complains that I don't show any affection, when she can be bothered to even talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 128

Stuck in the past

By Anonymous - 05/04/2020 05:00

Today, I found out my boyfriend still writes Twilight fan fiction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 401

You deserved it 400

No rest

By Anonymous - 30/10/2021 11:00

Today, I'd booked a day off work so I could sit and read books all day. I told my wife this, and her response was basically, "Well since you're at home not doing anything important, here’s a list of jobs that need doing." I wasn’t aware enjoying reading counted as doing nothing important. FML

I agree, your life sucks 701

You deserved it 343

By actor my ass - 21/01/2012 22:44 - Canada

Today, trying to be romantic, I invited my girlfriend over to watch a movie. I said she could pick one up on the way, and I'd pay for it later. I ended up having to suffer through some "movie" that involved nothing but Nicolas Cage gurning like a stroke victim between crappy fight scenes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 292

You deserved it 29 106

By whymanwhy - 13/04/2015 10:43 - Czech Republic

Today, I went on a date with a cute guy I met at a bookstore. He stood up and said he was leaving when I said that I didn't like 50 Shades of Grey, because he, "doesn't want to be near a bitch who doesn't know her place". He then told me to give him a ride home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 188

You deserved it 3 340

ManInTheMachine 19

Tuesday 22 May 2012 22:35

Dammit redbluegreen! You edited your comment and now I look like an idiot.

Snafuusmc 12

Tuesday 22 May 2012 21:52

IT'S A TRAP!

Comments

JayLite 0

Thursday 24 May 2012 16:34

There's plenty of hot sex scenes in that book. Maybe, she wanted to have some ideas on how she can turn u on ; )

token_blackguy 18

Thursday 24 May 2012 17:50

A great philosopher once said, "Money over bitches."

Jamialia 5

Thursday 24 May 2012 19:10

You're pathetic. You turned a FML from complaining about something your wife did in to whinging about the plot of the book. Is your FML about the book or your wife? Dumb mutt.

rogerover 19

Thursday 24 May 2012 19:49

Next time you see her reading that book just start taking her clothes off. She won't resist.

mmroberts1227 1

Thursday 24 May 2012 22:33

50 shades is not Twilight. Other than it is about a guy and girl falling in love. If she was more interested in reading a sex book than hanging out with you, you might as well just go to work.

Zeldasherolink 0

Friday 25 May 2012 10:56

I just wanna say thank you for warning me not to read this book

AngiiieMariiie 0

Friday 25 May 2012 22:35

Read the book! You'll understand why it's much more interesting than your inability to satisfy her. P.S. Fifty Shades of Grey is not twilight. WTF!

barnesrl 1

Saturday 26 May 2012 9:33

50 Shades of Grey is nothing like Twilight, both of which I have read. As for fanfiction, this is a rumor started to connect a new book to an older successful one in the hopes that it will sell better amongst the older books fans. Thus far, however, 50 Shades has held its own!

Caldwell123 0

Wednesday 20 June 2012 12:41

That book was really good.

billyz77 24

Sunday 6 January 2013 8:40

Holy shit that's a long ******* comment! After reading the damn thing, I really want the minutes of my life back that I wasted on it. Ah, **** it. I'll just go have another cigarette. What's it matter? I'll be dead soon anyway.