Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
Today, my two year old daughter did not want to leave the toy store, when I picked her up she started screaming at the top of her lungs, "YOU'RE NOT MY DADDY!". FML
Today, my son asked for candy at a supermarket checkout. I said no. He laid on the floor and began screaming as if I'd killed his pet rabbit. Other parents nodded at me in silent sympathy, while strangers judged me with their glares. I bought the candy. He still screamed. FML
Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML
Today, a bratty kid at Walmart called my mom a "fat bitch" when she wasn't walking fast enough for him. Enraged, I gave him the meanest death glare I could muster and I tore him a new one, right in front of his mother, who then defended her kid, saying that my mom and I should both lose a few pounds. FML
Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML
Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML
Today, I was in a store when a child looked at me and said to his mother "look at that tall man!" His mother replied "he's an evil giant isn't he, darling?" I then mimed being an evil giant to make the kid laugh. His mother slapped me. FML
Today, I went shopping with my two sons and my wife. We got separated after a while, and I spotted my son in the video game section of the store. I snuck up behind him and playfully slapped him on the back of the head. The kid turned around and it wasn't my son. His mom was none to happy. FML
Today, I took my 6 year-old to work. A normally docile child, she chased me around with her toy - beating me with it while all my colleagues watched - not stopping despite me requesting her to. When she finally lost said toy, she threw a huge tantrum. Guess who's banned from my office. FML
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Top comments
Sammeh_Higgins 0
Kids have gotten so disrespectful.
Moota 9
Someone needs to have a little talk with daddy about name calling?
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Comments (247)
Zackalack123 1
Some ppl need to learn to dicipline their kids!
wickedwyatt234 3
Its Punishment......learn it
anoellem 1
If I ever even thought about talking to my mom like that when I was little.... Just no.
LadyGore 12
Solution: Step one: get some boxes on your way home Step two: sit your son on his bed in his room Step three: throw all his toys in the boxes Step four: lock them away in a closest Teach that little brat to respect his mother before he grows up to be a disrespectful asshole. Oh and confront your husband.
nikkidoodle1995 0
I would've beaten that child's butt.
thejellycar 3
Sigh now see if ur with an asian ....
mike307 11
Discipline your son.
Woodshs2010 4
I really don't think that's the child's fault. I feel sorry for you.
TheImaginarySong 16
You shouldn't be worried about him saying it in front of the store. You should be worried that your husband said it about you.
stormfyre 13
LOL I'm ******* dead.