Intimacy: Today, I told my boyfriend that since I lost my job I can't afford... - FML

By ehwat - 26/11/2009 05:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend that since I lost my job I can't afford a Christmas present for him, or anyone. He said trying anal would be fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 881

You deserved it 12 781

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

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Same thing different taste

By fuckered519 - 06/12/2014 19:53 - United States - Du Quoin

Spicy

Today, being useless at thinking of gifts, I asked my boyfriend what he wants for Christmas. I said it could be anything that I could afford. He looked me in the eye and said very seriously: "Anal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 225

You deserved it 12 603

By Anonymous - 30/04/2014 21:51 - United States

Spicy

Today, the only thing I got for my birthday was my boyfriend's offer to give me "the gift of anal". FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 611

You deserved it 5 531

By Anonymous - 23/02/2013 18:27 - Denmark - Copenhagen

Spicy

Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 293

You deserved it 48 547

By Anonymous - 19/04/2010 20:36 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. He followed it with, "Want to try anal?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 670

You deserved it 9 729

By selfishsexysanta - 24/12/2012 18:06 - United States

Spicy

Today, I gave my husband an early Christmas present: Santa-themed lingerie. He got angry and called me selfish, for "using" him as an excuse to get myself nice stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 422

You deserved it 13 832

Cheers

By imgoingtofreakout - 26/12/2017 19:00

Spicy

Today, my Christmas present from my boyfriend was chlamydia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 549

You deserved it 651

Preparation

By Anonymous - 18/08/2022 12:00

Spicy

Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, but when I told him anal takes prep, like stretching and lubing, and you can’t just jam a knob up there like in a porno, he lost all interest, asked for a blowjob, and when I said no, he started sulking. I struggle to remember why I’m with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 275

You deserved it 394

By Doy - 19/12/2011 06:31 - Canada

Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't know what I was going to do over the Christmas holidays since he was going to be out of the country. He suggested that I work out and do some sit-ups. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 524

You deserved it 8 551

By lovinglife - 24/12/2011 12:51 - United Kingdom

Today, I wrapped my boyfriend's Christmas presents for him, because he was too lazy to do it himself. This included my own present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 575

You deserved it 6 342

By Anonymous - 30/11/2010 06:06 - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he wanted for Christmas. He then told me that he would only tell me if I promised not to get mad, so I agreed. He told me that he wants me to start working out because I'm getting fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 621

You deserved it 33 103

Next

Top comments

perdix 29

Thursday 26 November 2009 12:37

Reiterate that you have no money. You just can't afford to hire a guy to pack his fudge.

popemichael 9

Thursday 26 November 2009 14:47

FYL? More like FYA! Have fun ^_^

Comments

Collinscap20 6

Monday 9 January 2012 3:10

Well let me try it on you ????

curlygirly1 8

Monday 19 March 2012 3:04

I'm very sorry that u r so sad :)

mccrightp 29

Friday 28 March 2014 5:16

Christmas solved ! :-)

pyromaniac69 4

Sunday 17 August 2014 3:26

That's fair.

kelseysking 26

Tuesday 11 November 2014 19:49

I say if you want to try go ahead, but if you don't just tell him no. if he really cares about you he wont pressure you onto it anymore. I've been with an ass hole that didn't respect me about anal after I had been raped analy. Like I said if you don't want to and he cares he won't pressure it anymore.

Masift 21

Friday 6 February 2015 17:25

he did say "try" just try it out and if it's too uncomfortable, then stop. It is your anus so you have a right to stop if you want to.

nikitazed 10

Monday 27 July 2015 18:07

Well if he wants it, just be gentle with his ass

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The Top

Today, my wife and I got frisky in the living room, completely forgetting we recently gave our adult daughter access to our home security cameras for safety reasons. The cameras didn’t see anything but she now keeps making fun of my orgasm noises, which apparently she found hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141

You deserved it 490

Today, I have a horribly painful throat infection and can't talk. In spite of this, Dad keeps insisting I call people for him, meaning I have to make use of a text to speech program. Eight out of twelve people I've called on his behalf have hung up, thinking I'm a scambot. Dad is blaming me for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 412

You deserved it 88

The Top

Today, I broke into tears at work after being told my aunt had a stroke. My boss told me to "suck it up, no one is that close to their aunt." My aunt adopted me when my mother passed away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 912

You deserved it 2 460

Today, I started my job as a waiter. I was excited when my first customer paid for the bill. I go over to the table, half-expecting a tip. I got to the table and no money was on the table. On the bottom receipt was written: "Ever heard of deodorant?" Apparently I smell bad. Thanks for the tip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 220

You deserved it 29 533

Today, my dad came to my graduate art show wearing a t-shirt saying "My other daughter is a science major". He'd had it specially made. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 854

You deserved it 7 624

Today, my mother told me that my dead grandmother speaks to her. How? When she's thinking of her while brushing her teeth, her electric toothbrush will suddenly stop buzzing and this tells her her mother is communicating with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 691

You deserved it 1 790

Today, my parents are mad because I turned down a job. It offered below minimum wage to work 12-hour shifts, six days a week, and the list of benefits was less than the occupational hazards. When I showed them what McDonald's was paying and their benefits in comparison, they accused me of being lazy and entitled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 511

You deserved it 90

Today, our landlord has begun eviction proceedings because he’s received over 100 complaints about our dog, who barks constantly, and who my wife has stubbornly refused to get rid of. My wife has basically forced us to choose between that fucking mutt and being homeless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 915

You deserved it 641