Miscellaneous: Today, I threw a rock in the air and watched it soar. And watched...

By Gale - 13/01/2009 15:01 - United States

Today, I threw a rock in the air and watched it soar. And watched it come back down and hit me in the face. Gravity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 869

You deserved it 52 935

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

By untitledentity - 24/05/2009 16:03 - United States

Today, I decided to use my mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling my anger, she told me to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree, very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 683

You deserved it 19 928

By Anonymous - 17/02/2014 02:29 - United States - Hedgesville

Today, I was throwing rocks into a pond while our class was on a field trip. The teacher started to pass around an old rare civil war bullet. As the bullet got to me, I threw another rock in the river, only to notice a rock in my hand and the bullet gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 527

You deserved it 62 935

By ouchmyeye - 10/06/2011 04:59 - United States

Today, as I was sleeping I heard something bang on my door. I walked on my balcony only to find my boyfriend throwing rocks trying to wake me. He didn't see me and threw a rock right into my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 693

You deserved it 5 122

By Anonymous - 04/02/2014 18:00 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, as I came home from school, I saw a little rock in the road. I kicked it, intending to send it sailing into the bushes in front of my house. It went wide and sailed straight into a window instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 491

You deserved it 16 773

By jadakorn - 11/07/2009 13:48 - United States

Today, I got home and threw my phone onto my bed as usual. This time it bounced out the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 173

You deserved it 29 382

What goes up…

By Anonymous - 27/01/2013 11:10 - United States - Grand Junction

Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 760

You deserved it 10 793

By hopeless - 27/06/2011 14:09 - Canada

Today, I was playing tetherball with my younger brother. I get really competitive, so I threw it as hard as I could. It came around and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 771

You deserved it 54 145

By BOOMerang - 24/09/2009 21:39 - United States

Today, I played with a boomerang my first time. I didn't believe that when you threw it, it comes right back to you. It flew back all right. And broke my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 429

You deserved it 45 445

By Anonymous - 29/11/2009 16:57 - United States

Today, my ceiling fan was rocking violently so I turned it off. I stood under it trying to figure out what the problem is, it fell on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 560

You deserved it 13 133

By swirkishly - 24/11/2011 16:06 - United States

Today, I was walking through my house when I noticed bits of plaster falling from the ceiling. Against all logic, I looked up, receiving a fragment directly in the eyeball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 987

You deserved it 10 010

Timmytwofinger 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 3:06

if it's any consolation i think i just pissed myself.

sai_fml 0

Saturday 28 February 2009 8:42

Wow you have an impressive arm...very very difficult to throw a rock straight up and down... You should put some of that training diligence into the "dodging" component of the excercise

Comments

michelleissexy 0

Wednesday 11 May 2011 13:03

Next time try a can of paint or a brick. You'll remember to move then...

sarahboo88 0

Saturday 14 May 2011 2:27

dumb ass

majorbob10 0

Monday 27 June 2011 16:06

I nominate you for a Darwin Award!

majorbob10 0

Monday 27 June 2011 16:09

I don't believe any of you realize the GRAVITY of OP's situation...

Bridget615 0

Friday 22 July 2011 4:17

Didnt it occur to u tht wen a rock is hurling towards ur face very quickly tht its a sign to move out of its way...duh?

Bridget615 0

Friday 22 July 2011 4:20

Didnt it occur to u tht wen a rock is hurling towards ur face very quickly tht its a sign to move out of its way...duh?

domking1315 20

Saturday 23 July 2011 20:06

Today, I decided to punch my twin that lives in the mirror. Stupidity.

BloodyMary666 24

Thursday 1 September 2011 18:58

I´m speechless right now. What the f*ck?! This is without a doubt the best FML I´ve ever read.

BloodyMary666 24

Thursday 1 September 2011 19:03

Argh, I meant "dumbest".

Renae123 0

Monday 5 September 2011 23:15

What made you think it wouldn't come Back?

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The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 265

You deserved it 14 937

Today, during sex, I was getting close to climax, which is unusual for me due to personal issues. However, I got a piercing headache and had to stop. I later found out my birth control can cause sex headaches and the best way to avoid them is to avoid orgasms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 517

You deserved it 181

The Top

Today, I was scheduled to work even though I'd booked the day off months in advance to take an important exam. Two weeks ago, I informed my manager and he said he found a replacement for me. An hour ago, my manager angrily called asking why I didn't show up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 811

You deserved it 130

Today, the manager that made my life a living hell for 3 years, who was demoted 6 weeks ago and transferred to another store, was transferred back to us as a salesperson. Now we work side by side 42 hours a week on the same exact schedule. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 289

You deserved it 185

Today, I was at my 10-year high school reunion. I saw the girl I used to have a BIG crush on, so I decided to go over and say hi. She screamed when she saw me. Then she started hitting me, looking panicked. I calmed her down and asked why she hit me. She says, "Everyone thought you were dead"' FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 818

You deserved it 2 800

Today, I was at my job, waiting tables. A fellow server and myself were given a party of 14 Bible thumpers. They left us $9.00 and a mini Bible after awesome service, telling us we did a great job. Unfortunately, religion doesn't pay for my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 742

You deserved it 6 466

Today, while at work for a dog groomer, I picked up a new puppy that came in for a groom. I held it up at face level with me, baby talking it, when it promptly began peeing. Luckily, it didn't get on my clothes. Unluckily, it got onto my face and into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 743

You deserved it 2 016

Today, my social anxiety got so bad that my 12 yr old daughter had to get in the driver's seat to order from the drive-thru. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 771

You deserved it 2 853

Same thing different taste

What goes up…

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