Today, I spotted an elderly man trying to use the ladder at work.... - FML

By ilovebigmacs - 6/8/2015 04:10 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I spotted an elderly man trying to use the ladder at work. Knowing customers aren't supposed to use these, I went over and helped. Not only did I fall from the ladder, but I landed on the old man's foot, breaking my elbow and fracturing his toe. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22686

You deserved it

3154

Tweet

Share

Serious times

Compassion

Goodbye Bill

By vikingunicorn - 23/5/2010 05:47 - Canada

Today, I was feeling very ill after a severe anxiety attack. I asked my boyfriend to hold my hand until I fell asleep. He said he couldn't because he needed both hands to play on his gameboy. FML

I agree, your life sucks

39765

You deserved it

7501

Tweet

Share

By britanyann - 6/1/2012 03:45 - United States

Today, I had to explain to my 25-year-old boyfriend why we cannot get pet raccoons. This is not the first time we have had this conversation. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27404

You deserved it

6353

Tweet

Share

By cantstopfeelingit - 16/12/2019 05:00

Gross!

Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4113

You deserved it

2407

Tweet

Share

By rain - 1/6/2009 02:05 - United States

Today, I called the number a guy had given me at a bar last night. I got the Soulja Boy Hotline. Now every few hours I get messages on my phone like 'Good morning! Jump on up and get yo swag on, this is Soulja Boy!' and I can't seem to get it to stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks

54521

You deserved it

8403

Tweet

Share

By mellielynnemily - 26/10/2014 22:46 - United States

Today, at my apartment complex, I was carrying a bag of trash up to the dumpster. A guy stopped his car and helped me carry it the rest of the way. I thanked him and he asked me out. I explained that I was married. He grabbed the trash bag and carried it back to my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40553

You deserved it

4419

Tweet

Share

By in debt - 1/11/2018 13:30

Today, a tree fell on our 3-month-old family car. Today, I also learned that my husband never insured it. It's probably scrap, and we still have to pay it off for the next 5 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2907

You deserved it

536

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 22/9/2010 14:36 - United States

Today, a girl I work with was talking to me in an Eeyore voice. I'm not sure if it's because she's sad and pathetic, or if she thinks I'm sad and pathetic. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22760

You deserved it

3886

Tweet

Share

By Violet - 5/4/2014 01:57 - United States - Exeter

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to get a shirt saying "I'm a girl," just so people won't think he's gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks

42018

You deserved it

5930

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 7/10/2009 01:11 - Canada

Today, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. I was feeling good about the fact that I was going down a waist size until the cashier decided to discuss with me, three co-workers, and the ten other people in line how she didn't even know jeans came in sizes that big. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40990

You deserved it

6773

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 25/5/2015 16:10 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I woke up in my living room after having a party. I then realized my fish tank with many different species was missing from its usual spot. After searching for a few minutes, I finally found it in the freezer. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30329

You deserved it

8312

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 18/9/2014 07:32 - Australia - Rosebery

Today, my girlfriend visited my restaurant with some guy I'd never seen before. She introduced him to me as her "new boyfriend". She was always a cold bitch, but I never saw this coming. I had to serve their food while choking back tears, and I couldn't work up the nerve to spit in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

56032

You deserved it

5383

Tweet

Share

By mynameislor - 9/2/2010 14:26 - Canada

Today, my mum was saying she needs to gain weight because she was underweight according to her doctor. She then said she's going to eat like me in order to gain more weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27142

You deserved it

7352

Tweet

Share

By icandothecancan - 21/6/2014 23:14 - United States - Duncan

Today, while in the yard, my 18-month-old son decided to take off running into the road, where a car was driving. I rushed after him, only for one of my dress straps to suddenly break without warning. It must have looked like I was trying to flag down the driver with my flailing tit. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46504

You deserved it

6104

Tweet

Share

By ParanoidFreak - 31/12/2010 09:31 - United States

Today, after I got in my car in the Walmart parking lot, a creepy man knocked on my window. Since I'm incredibly paranoid and scare easily, I put my car in gear and tore out of there, accidentally hitting another car. Apparently he was returning my phone that I dropped. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8900

You deserved it

40057

Tweet

Share

By disappointed - 25/3/2014 11:36 - United States - West Fargo

Today, I finally finished watching Dexter. I was more disappointed by the finale than the picture I later received of my girlfriend cheating on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45856

You deserved it

5495

Tweet

Share

By AHHH_REPTAR - 23/6/2016 04:54 - United States - Spearfish

Today, while drilling holes in "No Smoking" signs for my job, I gave myself a minor cut that would appear to most as a papercut. I then had to fill out 3 double-sided pages of paperwork. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12525

You deserved it

1368

Tweet

Share

By imanidiot - 3/3/2009 06:29 - United States

Today, I was sitting in traffic for about an hour. I've heard stories about people doing the dirty in their cars and I never do anything risky so I thought, why not, I'll be here a while, no one can see me: I'll masturbate. Midway through I hear a tap on my driver's window. Its a police officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32176

You deserved it

151953

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 2/5/2012 22:41 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I had a chest x-ray. I thought everything was okay, that is until the tech gasped slightly and muttered, "Mother of God." I asked him what was wrong, and he kept insisting he had no idea what I was talking about. Now I'm so upset I can't even sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34951

You deserved it

2451

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 26/9/2010 04:59 - United States

Today, at work, an old lady came through my line to buy some groceries. She told me she lost her purse and was a little short. It was busy, so I pulled out my little purse and gave her the money she needed. A few minutes later she returned with my boss, insisting that my purse was hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks

37638

You deserved it

3254

Tweet

Share

By missyoudad. - 31/8/2010 07:54 - Australia

Today, I Googled my father, who I haven't seen in 3 years. The first website link was his obituary. When I confronted my mom about it, she said, "Oh, didn't I tell you?" and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks

49369

You deserved it

2836

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 15/1/2016 16:41 - Canada - London

Today, I took my labrador to the vet because he seemed really sick and wasn't acting like his usual self the past few weeks. The vet said nothing was physically wrong with him and that he's most likely suffering from depression. My own depression is why I got a dog in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22791

You deserved it

2011

Tweet

Share

By sabrinatarmine_ - 22/7/2013 02:35 - United States - Carmel Valley

Today, I told my boyfriend I had diabetes. He won't talk to me anymore because he thinks I'll infect him with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

52525

You deserved it

4043

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 8/2/2012 17:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I accidentally dropped a sculpture at college, and it broke. Some weirdo wearing a pink cape and a fake moustache bitched me out and told me not to be such an attention-seeking drama queen. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28913

You deserved it

3470

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 4/6/2014 13:56 - United States

Today, a coworker asked me why this week's report was not uploaded to the server. I've been writing these reports once a week for a year and they take a whole day to write. Upload them to what server? FML

I agree, your life sucks

41822

You deserved it

6329

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 24/6/2013 20:26 - United States - Houston

Today, I took my girlfriend of nearly 2 years out to dinner so I could propose. When the waiter brought the check, I caused a bit of a scene to get everyone's attention. When I got on my knee and proposed, she said no and asked if I could hurry up and pay, because she was embarrassed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

62607

You deserved it

18173

Tweet

Share

By wtffireworks! - 26/5/2011 02:10 - United States

Today, at work, there was a police officer waiting for me. Bewildered, I asked what the problem was. Someone had shot fireworks at cars in the parking lot and I was a suspect. Why? Ponytails on men apparently look suspicious. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34111

You deserved it

18473

Tweet

Share

By elevenharries - 3/6/2010 08:54 - United Kingdom

Today, after staying at my boyfriend's house for the first time, I got in the shower. His bathroom door doesn't lock, so half way through my shower he walked in. Trying to be sexy, I pressed myself up against the glass, which turned out the be a door that opens outwards. I fell on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks

21949

You deserved it

42025

Tweet

Share

By MariadelMar - 19/8/2009 15:03 - United States

Today, I flew 8 hours to visit my boyfriend. When I arrived at the airport, and he started taking long to show up, I checked my email to see the info. I hit the junk mail by accident and found his last 10 emails in there. He had broken up with me a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks

53500

You deserved it

16191

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 15/2/2010 18:41 - United States

Today, I was bored at work, so I started doodling a big muscly arm on my notepad, including bulging veins. After I returned from lunch, my boss called me into his office. Apparently the mail clerk saw and was offended. I was asked to explain why I was drawing a person's 'private area'. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24370

You deserved it

7667

Tweet

Share

By gasbrain - 5/9/2020 20:06

Buyer's market

Today, after being unemployed for a couple of months, I got a call back from a security job I did for a week. But with a new condition: besides the security work, one day in the week they want me to cut grass, paint and clean up the grounds for the same minimum wage. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1122

You deserved it

163

Tweet

Share

By D - 9/9/2011 09:59 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking down the street when a police officer started walking behind me with his dog. I sped up and tried to cross the road. He took this as suspicious and got the dog to take me to the floor. I've been afraid of dogs since I was 5. FML

I agree, your life sucks

39108

You deserved it

4802

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 28/6/2014 01:02 - United States - Imperial

Today, I couldn't find my vibrator. After searching for an hour I decided to ask my husband. He quickly shook his head no. We've been married for ten years. I know when he's lying. FML

I agree, your life sucks

50744

You deserved it

10669

Tweet

Share

By omgwtfsam - 27/7/2009 00:53 - United States

Today, my dad somehow found some pictures of my boyfriend having sex with some girl and went on a rampage about how pissed he was that he was cheating on me. I had to explain to my parents that I was the girl in the pictures. FML

I agree, your life sucks

50431

You deserved it

19174

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 18/5/2009 04:48 - United States

Today, I celebrated my birthday with my family. As part of my presents, my parents gave me prepaid debit card. When I got home, I looked at it again and realized it's the debit card you get from selling back books to our university bookstore. I bought my own books this year. They gave me my own refund. FML

I agree, your life sucks

47315

You deserved it

2875

Tweet

Share

By farf - 20/5/2015 18:47

Today, I received 46 emails from co-workers who were using reply-all to tell everyone else not to use reply-all. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26158

You deserved it

2020

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 12/12/2013 00:51 - United States - Buffalo

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks

57570

You deserved it

8906

Tweet

Share

By babs - 7/5/2013 19:07 - United States

Today, I was in the doctor's office waiting for my husband to arrive, when a little old lady sat beside me. She seemed nice, until she started farting and blaming it on me. They weren't silent; they sounded like trucker farts and smelled like death. I was there for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51059

You deserved it

4722

Tweet

Share

By fuck you, jack - 4/3/2014 20:44 - United States - Peabody

Today, I got home late from work, so I decided to make myself a microwave meal. I pierced the plastic film several times. A little too loudly for my hateful bastard of a neighbor, I guess, because he called the cops on me, claiming he heard gunshots from my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46113

You deserved it

3275

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 10/12/2015 13:27 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I fell asleep while using my laptop. The next thing I know, it's 8am and my dad is screaming at me for posting "u skank-ass cunt-face" on my mom's Facebook timeline. I never made that post, but he won't believe me. My asshole brother, meanwhile, can't stop smirking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23823

You deserved it

2454

Tweet

Share

By box butt - 7/3/2017 00:00

Today, after much dieting and exercise, I can proudly say that my love handles are now bigger than my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5292

You deserved it

606

Tweet

Share

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By hussamhasi | 22

#6373109 - Thursday 6 August 2015 18:48

At least you wanted to help

By jentrynicole | 20

#6373114 - Thursday 6 August 2015 18:52

Honestly, he's hurt a lot less than what would have happened if he fell off the ladder.
Not that he necessarily would have....but I'm trying to make you feel better.

COMMENTS

By hussamhasi | 22

#6373109 - Thursday 6 August 2015 18:48

At least you wanted to help

By jentrynicole | 20

#6373114 - Thursday 6 August 2015 18:52

Honestly, he's hurt a lot less than what would have happened if he fell off the ladder.
Not that he necessarily would have....but I'm trying to make you feel better.

By Tarlachia | 33

#6373115 - Thursday 6 August 2015 18:53

For an octogenarian, his toe dominated your young whippersnapper elbow!

Reply

OysterPearls | 33

#6373158 - Thursday 6 August 2015 19:22

I hope he didn't lash out in anger by doing something like wiping snot in OP's hair after the accident.

Reply

ubeenbagged | 6

#6373983 - Friday 7 August 2015 10:40

I didn't get this until I read a couple more posts

By cristy91 | 33

#6373117 - Thursday 6 August 2015 18:53

Ah, that is a pretty bad turn of events. Maybe you could get some workman's comp? If anything, you learned customers need to keep a safe distance from the ladder at all times (I guess that's a bright side)

By whassallt26 | 13

#6373118 - Thursday 6 August 2015 18:54

Did you walk under it before helping him...

By CommentKing207 | 23

#6373120 - Thursday 6 August 2015 18:55

At least you were trying to protect him. It's not like you did it intentionally.

By vikky538 | 28

#6373121 - Thursday 6 August 2015 18:55

You wanted to help that matters... But you can change destiny which is that the old man getting hurt.

By karcummings | 19

#6373122 - Thursday 6 August 2015 18:56

well atleast you tried helping.

By LadyLuck93 | 20

#6373124 - Thursday 6 August 2015 18:57

Don't take it to heart, accidents do happen. At least you have good intentions about caring for others. Get well soon, op.

By corky1992 | 33

#6373138 - Thursday 6 August 2015 19:07

At least it was you that fell and not him. He probably would have gotten injured worse.