You're a jackass.

Let's thread jack and say i find OP's name hilarious

Roll playing maybe, a weird fetish where OP's girlfriend likes to lick faces?

this reminds me of those commercials where someone's at a party, they fall asleep and the people at the party take advantage of them by drawing on their faces and stuff, lol! 8D

He could have been sleeping when she did it.

I think it sounded like a good idea at the time.

So what...itll cum off eventually

This sounds suspiciously like that one scene from Dinner for Shmucks.

65- Was that a pun? If it was, good job.

ya it will definetly cum off after he rubs it for 30 minutes. i bet he's ready to explode!! you know cuz he's angry...

I see what you fucking did there.

cum joke ruined^

I was referring to 70's picture..

Haha OP's name.. :)

If you wanted a circumcision you might let someone with a sharpie near your cock. I don't see why anyone would want to draw a face on a cock though :/

60- or they were wasted

Geez why are you freaking out it's not like anyones gonna see it

Flockz's comment was actually fair...

Only the OP's girlfriend and him will see this though, At least he wasn't duct taped to the ceiling and painted like a clown :)

Just have her suck it off ;-)

Hey:D

Oui oui! Pee Pee!

Lame

Now it's time to turn her tongue and lips black!

Because he is a guy

Baby oil will do the trick.

That's classy!

You can just masturbate with soap... works perfectly well

You can just masturbate with soap... works perfectly well

Not a major loss assuming she lets pierre visit her throat.

The incorrect English in this OP is REALLY bugging me.

I feel so incomplete T_T Daaamn you, sucky hair growth!

Freddie Mercury's moustache=EPIC!

Just apply soap and masturbate really really fast!

Not to fast though! Pierre throws up on fast rides. D:

^ I see what you did there

@4: That explains your fugly girlfriend.

I find it... Kinky?

Can we try that again in English please?

I second that.

I think I can translate that... Your dick is so big that your girlfriend can put a face on it.

People can draw faces on pinkies, so I don't know wtf 6 is talking about.

So your face is big for the fact that she can put a dick on it?

Dude, they make fine tip sharpies. :P

104 - more like in......

Hahahahahahhaha nice one

The fuck did I just try to comprehend?

With your hairy pubes, it already looked like a terrorist.

Tu n'est pas intelligent.

Je ne suis pas français. Google Translate est mon ami!;D

Translation: your companion/significant other, something about dear man, is impressive. The other guy then said you were intelligent. I'm so smart at French I think.

Actually, I said "Your companion, my (mon) dear (cher) sir (monsieur),[...]" But I did make a mistake when I translated #14's comment :) I beg you pardoooon ;D

Ta copine, mon cher monsieur, est géniale. Would be the correct format, I believe :) so you almost had it!

Copine is friend, wouldnt you say it differently..?

Actually "petite copine" would indicate a significant other. So yes.

Why thank you, dear sir! Another learning moment, right here! Delightful^^

Je ne sais pas parle e comprehend la Francais...Canadian French :)

Oui

Yo hablo español....

und deutsch...

We used to say "petite copine" but now "copine" works as well. We say "amie" for friend.

Umm what lol yo no se lo que están hablando =( pero me sale chistoso gracias por haciendo me reír un poco =)

ajdjr skcurneu kahxhebdi!translate that frenchies;)

copine is formal French is it not? Amie is conversational. and auto correct really hates typing in French it seems...

No he said she isn't intelligent. The n' and pas make it negative.

28 fails XD nice try though

110 yo tambien ich spreche deutsch und spanisch auch!!

what if she got ink in the piss hole????? how awesome would that be?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!

Imagine if the alcohol gets in his penis hole...Oh dear God!!! I'm a woman and I can still feel that. Let me just say that this is not the best idea...

A penis is not a hand

Alcohol probably got him into this situation in the first place. :p

Ur a fucking idiot alcohol?On ur penis?Wow u r a dumb ass that wud burn like hell

.

Oui

96- DAMN! Is that how you talk to your elders? If you disagree, just say it. You don't necessarily have to insult her. She is 49 and you're 16...

#24 - I feel that there should be an FML out there with your nick on it....

86 but a hand is a lonely penis's best friend

Lmao This reminds me of the Robot Chicken episode where this guy got a penis transplant from a serial killer and his dick started trying to kill people.