By GetMeTheDamnBleach - 21/10/2014 19:46 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I smashed a spider with my pencil eraser. Later, I absentmindedly chewed on it while doing my homework. FML
I agree, your life sucks 23 512
You deserved it 32 141

Same thing different taste


Ah, you're one of those people who rushes to comment on every new FML.

#10: What's wrong with commenting on every FML? She thinks she has something relevant to say, so let her. Her comment was much more relevant than yours.

It's not a witty comment. It's not an empathetic comment. It's just a comment that will eventually be buried by more fml entries. Sorry if I have offended you in some way.

You're right, I'm just mad at her for taking 1st )=

So, it is true that you Canadians apologize for everything #17 ... And I thought it was only a tease! Sorry about that

Another quick way to get fiber, for the low price of free! (Warning, may feel crawling in stomach)

your avatar goes perfect with this FML

YDI for A) Not just catching the spider and putting it outside, and B) After killing it, leaving its corpse just stuck to the end of a pencil.

Well maybe she did dispose of the spider's corpse, but then forgot about the icky germs that remain.

larrena2377 26

Who catches a spider and puts it outside?

juturnaamo 29

Same here. Or I just leave them, because they protect the house.

Marcella1016 31

I also catch and put outside. If I was the spider, I wouldn't want some giant behemoth arbitrarily killing me when all I do is catch and dispose of bugs for them. That's just me, though. I'm one of those weirdos who doesn't like to kill things smaller than me just because I can.

There is a reason why people kill them. The fear and killing of spiders is a natural instinct to humans. Why? Even if the spider isn't dangerous from a bite, you don't know unless you know your spiders. People die all the time from getting bitten by spiders. So, excuse us for being smart and killing the killer before it kills us.

By that logic we should be killing anything that's a threat to us. Biggest threat to people? Other people. Seriously.

"The fear and killing of spiders is a natural instinct to humans." Aaaactually, no. Research on the topic has shown fear of spiders, as well as a lot of "creepy crawlies" in general, is a learned, cultural behavior that's comorbid with equally irrational fears of harmless critters. You were raised in a culture where it's normal and just generalized it to the rest of the planet. For starters, look up G.C. Davey's "The 'Disgusting' Spider: The Role of Disease and Illness in the Perpetuation of Fear of Spiders," published in Society & Animals, or his article "Why Are We Afraid of Spiders?" published by Psychology Today. Of course, since you've already given an implied sentiment that you literally believe any given spider is a "killer", you may well be out of the reach of factual information at this point.

The incy wincy spider climbed up the waterspout, down came the pencil and squished all its guts out...

Dillyduzit 23

At least you're brave enough to keep using the pencil after having killed a spider with it. If it were me, that pencil would be long gone. And that's just assuming I could muster the courage to kill the spider at all in the first place. So props to you on that, OP.

That pencil was a weapon of battle! I'd keep it close by in case I needed to slay any more spiders.

Dillyduzit 23

That might be a good idea as long as you don't have an oral fixation like the OP.

Does it count as one of the 20 something spiders we are supposed to eat in a lifetime?

That's been debunked as a stupid unfounded myth

tantanpanda 26

well, to be fair, that can't actually be proved. nobody is going to do a study with 30+ people (n > 30 for normal data) and record them sleeping for the rest of their lives to see if they swallow a spider in their sleep.

8 times the legs, 8 times the flavor! (Sorry OP, hope it wasn't too bad.)

Actually "8 times" refers to multiplication so lets say the normal amount of legs on most animals, it would be "2 times the legs" and if your refering to "normal" legs on humans then it would be "4 times the legs" unless you live in an alternate dimension with dominantly 1 legged creatures and for some reason have internet that can hop through the multiverse. In that case, im wrong.

Hey look at the bright side with all those spider juices at the end of the pencil who knows you might turn into Spider-Man.