Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally caught the person who has now and again been stealing my lunch at work for weeks. It was my boss. I awkwardly watched him eat my sandwich while he talked about how he's been "saving money by bringing food from home." FML
Today, I was running late for work and skipped breakfast. At a red light, I noticed a granola bar in my bag and so I took a bite, only to realize it was actually a dog treat I'd stuffed in there days ago. FML
Today, I overheard my coworkers talking about how someone has been stealing lunches from the office fridge. Feeling guilty, I admitted that I took a sandwich yesterday, thinking it was free. Turns out, they were joking to see who’d confess. FML
Today, for what has seemed to be the hundredth time, my labeled bagged lunch was stolen from the fridge at my workplace. I stormed into my boss's office ready to complain, only to find him eating it. FML
Today, after weeks of stealing lunch from one of my employees, he made a sandwich with canned cat food, soap, and something unimaginably spicy that caused me to spew all over my office and laptop. I fired him. Now everyone is treating me like a monster. FML
Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML
Today, I went and bought lunch for all the people I work with. The only meal the place forgot was mine. FML
Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML
Today, I made myself a snack. I took a seemingly clean plate from the sink which had been used earlier for scrambled eggs. Only after I'd made the snack did I remember I let my dog lick the plate clean. FML
Today, a coworker threw my lunch in the trash. They'd just got back from holidays, and I use the same containers they do. My leftovers "looked like something they'd eat", so they thought it was something they'd forgotten before going on holidays. It was leftovers that I'd been spacing out, trying to make last till payday. FML
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Top comments
jereka05 0
YDI - Make your own freaking sandwiches
gigi37 0
Well, that's what you get for stealing someone else's food. What, were you too lazy to make your own? It's not that expensive to get a dollar hamburger Are you really expecting sympathy on here?
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Comments (406)
xFenix81x 0
Perhaps you shouldn't steal other people's lunches, dumbass. If I caught you stealing my lunch, I would break your fingers.
TheKitsune 0
HAH! Epic. I want to marry your co-worker.
deathproof_fml 0
Possibly the biggest YDI on the entire site, you thieving cumguzzler.
vaughnb21 0
Id put some laxatives, and some viagra with some dog shit in that.
NRA_advocate 5
if you were still my sandwiches i would've bust a nut all over the sandwich put laxatives and viagra mixed with some colon blow
Ohnothingreally 0
YDI thief. Make your own damn sandwich. The person should have also put some "Chocolate" in the center.
lakita_lover 0
Gee, sounds like someone was trying to teach you a lesson, and if you're posting this as an FML you apparently didn't learn it so I'll spell it out for you: Stealing is wrong. Stop taking your co-worker's food and bring your own damn lunch, jerk!
aq2004 0
YDI for stealing. I would have left you an Ex-Lax milkshake.
ragsy 7
I read this last week. How original.
worldclassrager 41
Through random they come back up...I have seen this a lot as well and it was posted in 2009 as well so it's been around awhile
Jincos 0
Today, I finally decided to trick a ****** who steals my lunch. However, I used my last can of dog food on a sandwitch this thing ate. FML