Today, I realized that my boyfriend will only have sex with me if I am on my stomach and not revealing my face. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my boyfriend finally told me after over two years together that the reason we only have sex once a month is because my stomach is, “off-putting”. FML
Today, my boyfriend informed me that from now on during sex, I have to be on top at all times, saying I need the exercise more than him. As offensive as this was, I was actually happy because he's crap on top. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend would rather jerk off to porn than to ever touch me, even if I wear a naughty outfit. FML
Today, my boyfriend kept pressuring me to get it on. I told him I was self-conscious abut my stomach and didn't want him to see it. His response? My double chin doesn't keep him from kissing me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing a game where you ask sexual questions and you have to give an honest answer. At one point, I asked my boyfriend what his favorite position is, to which he quickly answered with no hesitation, "Any one where I don't have to see your face or body." FML
Today, I realized my boyfriend uses sex as a way to get me to stop talking. FML
Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML
Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML
Today, I was feeling a little racy and decided to send my boyfriend some naked pictures of myself. He responded, "That's OK, but does your face have to be in them?" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to see more of his passionate side. He pushed my head down towards his lap. FML
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Top comments
jess6blondie9 3
What a nice boyfriend you've got there. You should find someone that appreciates you for more than just sex.
pablothepenguin 2
Your face is his **** block...?
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Comments (61)
OrgasmicBunnies 9
put a bag over your head?
Miss_Kristen 10
Still counts!
OrgasmicBunnies 9
put a bag over your head?
pan1cked 0
maybe he just likes it ass up! he's probably one of those guys who love nice butts. take it as a compliment!
djnova11 4
haha that's awesome
FLChicken 0
I love ******* my BF with him on his stomach. Maybe it has something to do with pinning that person down.
Darcon 8
dayym! It would be easier to just put a bag on OPs head..
jess6blondie9 3
I would hope so too. But some girls aren't, so who knows.
pimpstatus 0
just like the song goes : face down, ass up, that's the way I like to f@ck ;D
Crazy4Christ 0
what song Is that?
nikkibear123 4
haha great song!!
YoLauryn 0
well obviously he's pretty ugly too if he can only get an "ugly" girl's pu**y. (not saying yur ugly)
jess6blondie9 3
Good one....
lmaoatall 6
he's a strange one. next time he's behind you and is about to drop a load, turn real quick and say, " here's looking at you kid" ! don't forget the big shit eating grin either.
FLChicken 0
love the smurf tongue! :P