Tim
United States
Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Big_gulps_huh
This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff
Minneapolis, United States
Shy guy
Today, I realized I am more confident running a million-dollar piece of construction equipment than I am around people of the opposite sex. FML
Female
Montebello, United States
Today, I was excited to finally get an interview after being unemployed since getting out of the military nearly a year ago. Turns out, they weren't even interested in hiring me. They'd just never met a female Marine before. FML
carboat
United States
Today, I woke up and I'm still in the Marine Corps. FML
Anonymous
Davis, United States
Today, I realized that I will be leaving for the US Marine Corps in June, and the presidential election is in November. I could potentially be serving with Trump as my Commander-in-Chief. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I realized the closest thing I have to guys hitting on me are the ones who ask to be my friend on Call of Duty because I have the word "girl" in my name. FML
Anonymous
Frying pan, meet fire
Today, I got back from an 8 month deployment but rather than being pleased to see me my wife wanted to continue the same argument we were having the day I left. I miss being shot at. FML
Fitz
United States
Benefits
Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
S3R1AL K1LL3R X
United States
Smooth brainrot
Today, in my college class, our teacher asked us what we wanted to do when we get out of college. I guess being a U.S. Marine gets you a lecture for the whole class to hear that I'm a war hungry pig, and should get a real job that requires a brain. My job field is Aircraft repair. FML
saywhat
United States
Today, I met the girl who dumped me because the distance between us was too great. We're in the same city again. She's now dating a Marine in Iraq. FML
Jaxter
United States
Catch!
Today, I was walking up to girlfriend's house when her terrifying Marine Corps dad threw a football at me. Not being very athletic, I surprised myself by catching it. He gestured for me throw it back and I watched it spiral wildy to the left and hit my girlfriend's mom in the face. FML
Top comments
dc4 12
Awww, that's cute :P
FreakinChaps 0
Girls aren't THAT scary...
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Comments (424)
texas_redneck88 10
Bahahahahah you're a douche for bein' afraid to talk to girls......damn jarhead
ashmichelle85 0
You're a douche, that "damn jarhead" is willing to lay down his life to protect your freedom and absolute douche baggedry! Show some damn respect for our military! And you call yourself an American!?
texas_redneck88 10
Um, yeah I actually do call myself an American. I did 3.5 yrs in the Navy, so yeah you're welcome. And if that's the attitude that you have towards veteran's, that's sad
valdawg 0
Only thing navy food for is ride to get job done!! Only 3.5 yrs?? Must have washed out haha
sgtrobswifey 0
He's just jealous.. He's never been able to talk to woman either and knows the smart ones won't talk to a guy who hot bunks and has had more "seamen" in them than they have. Hooah!
AlexisGadd 0
Dick.
ashmichelle85 0
No, I'm the daughter of a veteran, Operation Desert Storm sound familiar? My dad is a Desert Storm vet. How about Vietnam? My uncle served in that one. Do you recall World War II? My grandfather served in that war. I appreciate all our veterans, but as a Vet don't you think you should show some respect to a brother in arms?
pvtpilot 0
I guess the navy never taught you respect
ihasbrains 10
******'s name explains his douche-bagginess. ******* rednecks...
sunflower226 0
I love a man in uniform ;-)
haydenbro03 4
and a tanline on your boob.
Vaginabutter 15
yup, pfx is gay and lonely
Bullpine 11
Thank you for serving.
beitzy 0
I don't think you'd have any troubles getting a girl so dont be afraid to go for it
dhsgirl 0
That's really cute as can be. That's shows ur sensitive side girls look for that
Tristyxxx 24
14 FTW
Bizzzy 5
Do it man, loosen up, relax and be yourself! :O
kenoswild 14
cmon. if ur a marine ud be man enuff to take a rejection with a bullet. women are better than a speeding bullet aimed at you. with a bullet you only die once and cant walk away, but a woman- you can walk away.
neptune997 4
U should have joined the Navy