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did you know 5 out of 5 guys. masturbate.. :O

Sir, this is the funniest FML I have ever seen. Thank you for making my day. As a reward, I bless you that you will succesfully masturbate.

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get a girlfriend!

Or a boyfriend? Whatever floats your boat.

what are the chances that a girl will go out with op?

Even if by some miracle a girl did go out with OP, she'd dump him after she finds out that he can't last 2 minutes in bed.

haha so true...

Hahaha. Now OP can't get action even from him/herself!

Or he could get a Shake Weight and start off on the lowest setting.

I had an asthma attack once

does anyone else think it's funny she said "aww" to a masterbating problem lol

lol he'd jizz when she gets on top of him

More cushion for da pushin

hey tarabelle you arr such a pretty looking girl so sad that i will never meet you.FML

Do u give sex lessons?

poor you :(

It took him THIS to realize that OP was fat? not the laughter if random strangers walking down the street? or not having any friends? or the ton if rolls under his stomach? OP deserves this

27-- just because that happens to you on a daily basis, it doesn't mean that it happens to op too.

I don't think that everybody laughs every time they see a fat guy. And some fat people I know have friends. We usually bury trolls.

27 just because he's out of shape doesn't automatically mean hes overweight

What 74 said. I know some pretty skinny, in-shape looking people who run out of breath after walking up a small hill. I also know some large people who can go on a run for a good hour and be just fine.

that doesn't happen in Canada we are awesome and don't insult fat people we embrace it

Or at the very least we embrace them as far as our arms can reach around.

except the ones in your class

WTF? How does that work? -.-

exactly, he must be rrally fat to get tired.

#35 - It happens to me sometimes. Maybe op was just masturbating really quickly and THAT'S why he ran out of breath. It isn't because he is overweight.

you can be out of shape nd be skinny..

77 - Yes, and this may sound stupid, but some people tend to hold their breath sometimes while jacking off too...

fatty fat fT.

HAHAHA lemmie guess you're so fat your balls are made of big macs XD

how is it not an insults he is so fat his balls are made of BIG MACS a compliment would be that he has balls of steel

It's a compliment because Big Macs are prestigious for being large. You just called OP's balls notably large.

Not only large, but tasty. His balls are large AND they attract hungry women.

Well I like it.. Continue amusing me, please :)

#83 ruined it with his creepy ass picture

@34, I don't think prestigious is the word you're looking for... "notable" fits better here. And how 'bout saying that his balls are made of Chicken McNuggets?

THEY ARE MADE OF BIG MACS NOT THE SIZE IM TALKING ABOUT MCDONALDS MAKES YOU FAT IM NOT TALKING ABOUT OP HAVING BIG DELICIOUS BALLS......learn grammer

Dude... you just spelled "grammar" wrong. YOU'RE one to talk.

hahahahahahahahahaha blackmail just got burned and it's freaking hilarious

lol @5. u r an retard

My iphone auto corrected it i did not spell it wrong my iphone is having malfunctions and i'm gunna guess 2 or 3 words have been misspelled

don't blame da iphone

You're blaming your iPhone? lmfao this is like blaming your calculator because it says 1 + 1 = 3 hahahahahahah

lmao you are a major dumbass and yout combacks sound like an 8 year made them up

Except it would never correct it to grammer unless he spelled it that way before.

hey maybe u all should suck on blackmails dick it was a funny joke god damn u guys r those type of people that look for things do wrong so u can go off about it becuz it gets u off fucking queers

Sir you never put a apostrophe between I'm at all

oops. in soviet russia, grammar nazi gets shot. so dont try to correct me or i keeeel you!

did you know 5 out of 5 guys. masturbate.. :O

did you know 5/5 people don't give a f___

it's actually 93%... not that I'm trying to start z argument or anything lol

who researches these things? hahaha

I'm a nasty cow. Please hate me, because I enjoy insulting random strangers. I think I also have a blue waffle, but I'm too embarrassed to go to the doctor!

shut up your ugly too

unless 95 actually wrote that herself for whatever reason, the mods on this site effin rule n_____n

He should do what I do. I'm ashamed of getting really out of shape. So I joined a gym and try to go 4 times a week. I'm gonna get a personal trainer and I'm eating much healthier now.

how can u have a blue waffle u look like ur 12 if u r and u have one then u need help or therapy!

ha, or they could try washing their vagina once in a while:)

DocBastard... Patient 95 needs you

5% can't get a erection and 2% are liars

actually make that 4 out of 5

Did you know Blackmail111 is a faggot?

did you know i dont give a shit

110 AWESOME SMILEY FACE n_____n

dude that's offensive I majored in masturbation

run more? stupid

or masturbate more? :D

aha sucks :)

Sir, this is the funniest FML I have ever seen. Thank you for making my day. As a reward, I bless you that you will succesfully masturbate.