Health, Sex, Relatable and Awkward: Out of shape

Out of shape

By Anonymous - 28/06/2022 02:00

Today, I’m now so unfit, I had to stop halfway through sex with my wife to catch my breath, and in the end we just gave up, as clearly neither of us was having an orgasm today. I don’t get it, I weigh exactly 11 stone and exercise regularly, but I have no stamina and shit lungs. I hate myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 278

You deserved it 348

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Same thing different taste

By RyanM - 13/02/2011 09:01 - Canada

Today, I realized how out of shape I am, when I couldn't finish masturbating because I ran out of breath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 987

You deserved it 64 715

Letting go

By Anonymous - 17/05/2023 15:00

Today, after 5 years of marriage, my once-gym-mad husband is now so unfit that even standard missionary sex makes him so breathless and light headed, he has to stop in case he passes out. He hasn’t given me an orgasm in over a year and yet he insists nothing's wrong with him, and that I’m just being mean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 365

You deserved it 271

Kinda effed up

By Anonymous - 13/11/2022 14:00

Today, and ever since a car accident, I’ve not been able to go to the gym anymore for more than a few minutes without crippling pain. I have a belly for the first time in my life, I can barely breathe without wheezing, and I’m even too unfit for sex anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 140

You deserved it 189

Embrace your kink

By Anonymous - 31/03/2022 16:00

Today, I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I can only have sex with really fat men, because that’s what turns me on, yet as soon as the sex is over, through no fault of theirs, I have to run to the toilet to be sick because I can’t believe what I just had sex with. I’m so messed up in the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 908

You deserved it 2 528

Health is overrated

By Anonymous - 16/03/2022 12:00

Today, trying to get into shape because I run out of breath after walking more than 30 minutes, I started to hit the gym. Too bad my legs didn’t want to cooperate and decided that it would cause limping-worthy pain for every step I took on the treadmill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 783

You deserved it 190

Power moves

By Travis - 10/09/2021 22:59

Today, my wife told me that I take her breath away. However, she was talking about my large stomach hitting her while we have sex and knocking the wind out of her with every thrust. FML

I agree, your life sucks 609

You deserved it 1 208

Soft as snow

By Anonymous - 25/09/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I discovered why my new boyfriend likes his sex slow and loving, like super slow. It’s because, despite being in shape, he’s so unfit that if he tries to go hard and fast he struggles to breathe and passes out on top of me. Guess my love life is limited to one mile an hour now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 145

Keep fit!

By anonymous - 13/04/2020 02:00

Today, my girlfriend and I were on the phone. She heard I was out of breath and asked me, "Are you okay?" I didn't have the heart to tell her that she'd caught me masturbating, and I'm so out of shape it sounded like I'd ran a marathon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 371

You deserved it 1 677

No stamina

By Anonymous - 04/05/2022 16:00 - United Arab Emirates

Today, my SO almost passed out during sex due to his lack of physical activity. I've forced him to start going to the gym. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 021

You deserved it 247

The end of an era

By Anonymous - 30/05/2022 06:00

Today, after I've climbed some of the world's tallest mountains before I was 30, including Everest, now thanks to Covid, plus a genetic lung condition I inherited from my absentee bastard father, I have to stop for breath halfway up the stairs, and sex can make me so lightheaded I pass out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 804

You deserved it 354

SirEnigM0nk 22

Tuesday 28 June 2022 2:05

Maybe stick with oral and see a doc about a new fitness routine? Are you under any other emotional or other stresses? Kudos for exercising regularly though.

Chazzster 28

Tuesday 28 June 2022 4:38

See a doctor. There are a variety of medical reasons that this could be happening. Don’t guess - See a doctor.

Comments

SirEnigM0nk 22

Tuesday 28 June 2022 2:05

Maybe stick with oral and see a doc about a new fitness routine? Are you under any other emotional or other stresses? Kudos for exercising regularly though.