Keep fit!

By anonymous - 13/04/2020 02:00

Spicy
Today, my girlfriend and I were on the phone. She heard I was out of breath and asked me, "Are you okay?" I didn't have the heart to tell her that she'd caught me masturbating, and I'm so out of shape it sounded like I'd ran a marathon. FML
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RichardPencil 30
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Tell her you have coronavirus and she'll feel sorry for you, and you'll get 14 days to masturbate in peace.

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LauraLaik 15
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I don’t think the problem isn’t that he was masturbating. As I understand it, he feels bad/guilty for being so out of shape and doesn’t want his girlfriend to know.

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Comments

RichardPencil 30
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Tell her you have coronavirus and she'll feel sorry for you, and you'll get 14 days to masturbate in peace.

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Lennie Mcfish 19
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so? if you masturbate you masturbate, who cares?

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RichardPencil 30
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Girlfriends and wives sometimes care. They feel they have first dibs on your baby batter. You can't just shoot it into a sock without giving them a chance.

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LauraLaik 15
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I don’t think the problem isn’t that he was masturbating. As I understand it, he feels bad/guilty for being so out of shape and doesn’t want his girlfriend to know.

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Yudith 22
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Tell her you tried to jog into your apartment. She will congratulate you for starting to get back in shape for bikini season.

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sickerthanyou 13
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At least she didn’t accuse you of boning someone else while on the phone with her

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WistayShlaio82 13

You get out of breath just from masturbation? I’m so sorry.

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BLACKHEART46101 10
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That's still better than your crush calling right as you are about to finish.

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