Miscellaneous: Today, I overheard my dad's friend complaining to my dad that...

By Deirbhile - 03/05/2009 16:40 - United States

Today, I overheard my dad's friend complaining to my dad that his new baby boy is a ginger. I continued listening, and heard my dad saying, "Yeah, there's nothing worse than having a ginger." I'm his daughter. I'm a ginger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 712

You deserved it 7 051

Miscellaneous

Age difference

Another great day to be alive

Stay safe, despite capitalism

By brittbrat4 - 05/07/2011 00:25 - United States

Today, I was jamming out in my car, tapping my fingers on the wheel and bobbing my head. At the next stoplight, I happened to look over and the passenger of the car next to me was holding a sign in the window saying, "I bet you don't have a boyfriend, do you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 606

You deserved it 6 360

By Anonymous - 22/07/2009 11:29 - Netherlands

Today, my husband and kids celebrated my 50th birthday. I turned 47. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 638

You deserved it 3 812

By Anonymous - 11/11/2015 11:03 - United States - Rochester

Today, I fractured my shinbone after slipping on a leaf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 746

You deserved it 2 267

By Kyrie - 14/09/2017 20:00

Today, I came down in the morning to find that my fridge died, leaving water and meat juice all over the floor. My town only has garbage pickup every other week and the last was yesterday. We're expecting a heat wave this week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 430

You deserved it 226

By Rae - 04/05/2012 21:09 - United States - Chicago

Today, after weeks of intense studying with the intent of pulling my grades up, I saw that in fact, they've all gone down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 784

You deserved it 3 369

By Anonymous - 06/08/2010 16:34 - United States

Today, my 24 year old girlfriend plugged her ears and stomped her feet while making really loud noises in our local video store. She then refused to stop until I agreed to rent and watch The Notebook with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 663

You deserved it 15 226

By BlueSuit - 14/02/2016 19:20 - United States - New York

Today, my boss gave me some mentorship. She told me, "You need to learn to let people do things for you. Until then, I'm going to micromanage your project because I want it done my way." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 455

You deserved it 1 392

A good shower

By headache - 26/12/2019 20:00 - United States - Mesa

Today, I was taking a shower when the water suddenly went cold. It spooked me so much I slipped and hit my head on the metal edge of the tub. My husband then said that I had the best Christmas gift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 512

You deserved it 224

By firebombtimEFUCKERS - 29/09/2012 16:32 - United States

Today, I finally managed to sleep, after two days of being kept awake by the miniature floodlights my neighbors have installed to scare off burglars. Only a couple of hours into my sleep, I woke up to the sound of their car being broken into. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 382

You deserved it 1 703

By mafille - 19/03/2015 03:22 - France

Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 252

You deserved it 5 464

Road hog

By DanJames24 - 10/10/2021 07:00 - United Kingdom - Rochdale

Today, a girl seemed to be tailgating me while I was driving home. I ended up letting her past as I didn’t like it, so I pulled into the next petrol station. She did too, so I thought I’d ask her why she was tailgating me. She asked what I was going to do about it, before kneeing me in the balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 120

You deserved it 218

Phone holder

By my arms hurt - 25/11/2019 20:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I had to sit in between two boys on a two-hour bus ride. They were watching a movie and each of them had shared an earphone. They made me hold the phone up so both of them could see the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 149

You deserved it 1 815

By bug20 - 18/07/2016 09:27 - United States - Wooster

Today, I received an almost $400 bill for Internet services I don't even have. When I called and talk to them they told me I still owe them $77 because I didn't catch it within 3 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 196

You deserved it 987

By Unappreciated Grandchild - 06/11/2012 07:59 - United States - Bel Air

Today, I looked over to see my grandfather looking thoughtfully at me. Feeling flattered because he rarely shows affection, I waved at him. He then said, "I was looking out the window" and continued to stare past my head out of the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 810

You deserved it 2 116

By Pusillanimous - 19/07/2009 05:12 - United States

Today, I was waiting in line with a friend, and she poked my stomach and said, "I wish I had your stomach." I asked her why. She said, "Boys wouldn't flirt with me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 233

You deserved it 5 425

By ThisIsGonnaBeAwkward - 06/12/2011 15:36 - United States

Today, I discovered that the word 'randy' means 'horny' in England. I'm going to England next semester to study abroad. My name is Randy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 448

You deserved it 5 258

By Amy - 19/05/2010 20:19 - France

Today, I discovered my boyfriend has a thing for pregnant women. I'm not pregnant though, my roommate is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 127

You deserved it 3 548

Hangry

By JoanT - 20/10/2020 11:08

Today, while petting one of the goats we have, the other one was jealous so it ripped out a chunk of my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 900

You deserved it 176

By Juicy12Jham - 09/09/2011 03:30 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with Microsoft Customer Service for about a total of 2 hours. That's the longest I've ever talked to anybody. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 043

You deserved it 4 448

By Anonymous - 13/02/2014 15:47 - United States - Kennett

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 473

You deserved it 52 982

By Argh - 03/11/2013 20:18 - France - Saivres

Today, my car keys are in my house and my house keys are in my car, and I'm in neither. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 848

You deserved it 9 255

By will - 14/08/2019 12:00 - Canada

Today, my 6-year-old son apparently decided to make a game out of clogging the toilet with toilet paper. He won, and now the whole basement is flooded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 437

You deserved it 198

By Anonymous - 08/08/2015 05:18 - Canada

Today, I witnessed my dad wake himself from a nap with his own fart and start panicking in confusion. I guess I shouldn't have broken down laughing, because he demanded to know what I did to him. He didn't believe the truth and bitched me out for screwing around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 472

You deserved it 2 136

Too soon

By Anonymous - 22/09/2010 19:22 - Chile

Today, I finally quit my job after talking with a friend about making our own design/multimedia company. While I was on my way to his house, he called me and told me not to quit because he got an awesome job offer and couldn't refuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 160

You deserved it 7 901

By Munch - 12/09/2017 04:00 - Australia - Mordialloc

Today, my short-tempered, alcoholic boyfriend proudly showed me the rifle he bought. This guy regularly swears at his own sneezes and often flies into fits of rage because it's hard to get his shoe on. Time to move out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 220

You deserved it 868

By koolkat9 - 22/12/2014 19:11 - United States - Albion

Today, my boyfriend told me that my mom paid him to date me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 952

You deserved it 3 280

By camzzz - 02/07/2011 08:27 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were walking around when she got lost in a crowd. And me, being a pig, playfully grabbed her butt. I realized it wasn't hers when the guy whose butt I'd grabbed by accident knocked me unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 152

You deserved it 47 503

By nomorexbox - 26/04/2011 19:20 - United States

Today, I actually heard my 14 year old son muse to himself, "If I can drive drunk in Grand Theft Auto, how hard could it be in real life?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 966

You deserved it 13 429

By Anonymous - 28/09/2015 09:01 - United Kingdom - Southam

Today, I was at a get-together at a friend's house. Half an hour in, it became clear that someone had farted, and we all took turns asking who it was. When someone asked me, my girlfriend chimed in with, "Oh please, if it was him, you'd all be dead". FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 841

You deserved it 4 660

By Anonymous - 09/05/2013 07:35 - United States - Norfolk

Today, I was laid off from my job as a manager. After cleaning out my office, I began clearing my computer. I received an email from HR announcing a job position that opened up. Too bad it was for my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 210

You deserved it 3 771

By itsnotthatIhatecharity - 26/08/2017 23:15

Today, I found out that because I, like many others, don't read the terms and conditions, I accidentally donated £200 to a charity because of a non-refundable payment on a volunteering trip. It's my parents' money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 005

You deserved it 3 074

My ears!

By epistaxis - 02/02/2009 00:43 - Australia

Today, I'm staying with my grandmother and overheard her having phone sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 299

You deserved it 2 630

By nakcba - 15/02/2011 10:21

Today, I was in my car and stopped at a red light. A homeless woman then started to throw rocks at my car for no apparent reason. I drive a convertible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 617

You deserved it 4 960

Property law

By wtf dad - 22/07/2020 23:00

Today, I asked my boyfriend, who’s a massage therapist, if he could help my mom with her chronic migraines by massaging her head and neck. My dad came home, saw them in the dimly lit room and knocked my boyfriend out cold for "touching his woman." My boyfriend dumped me and wants my dad arrested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 286

You deserved it 573

By LonelyBoy - 16/03/2010 05:12 - United States

Today, I realized my girlfriend has way more friends than I do. How did I realize this? She called me to tell me she was at the beach with her friends and how much fun she was having. I was playing WoW in my room, and my friends don't answer my texts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 639

You deserved it 26 865

By I'm so wet, baby - 28/11/2014 17:27 - United Kingdom

Today, while at work, I really had to pee. Since my break was soon, I decided to hold it as another customer came to my till, but I didn't see she had 3 trolleys full of food. It took ages to scan all of it, and when I left for my break, I had an empty bladder and a wet seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 690

You deserved it 7 589

By WhyMe - 27/11/2018 17:30

Today, I woke up approximately half a nanosecond after my dog involuntarily vomited in bed. On my face. I opened my mouth because it literally filled my nose. I swallowed out of reflex before I was fully awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 408

You deserved it 297

By Anonymous - 25/05/2011 20:33 - Canada

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook from my biological father, who I have never met in my life. As I was scrolling through his hobbies and interests, I saw "Drinking," "Black women with big asses," and "Getting laid, lol." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 097

You deserved it 3 958

By damn it rose - 31/05/2014 13:40 - United Kingdom - Derby

Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 312

You deserved it 8 108

By alainopotato - 02/01/2017 11:03 - United States - San Diego

Today, I woke up in a bathtub, completely soaked and covered in both mine and someone else's puke. Happy New Year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 413

You deserved it 5 322

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Top comments

pinkducttape 0

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Sunday 3 May 2009 23:02

harsh and uncalled for. i actually like red hair.

lookitsnatash 0

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Sunday 3 May 2009 23:06

I didn't think anybody but Eric Cartman thought so low of red-haired people.

pinkducttape 0

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Sunday 3 May 2009 23:02

harsh and uncalled for. i actually like red hair.

kill3rs 0

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Wednesday 5 January 2011 10:22

YDI for being a gibger

holygodthatshars 0

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Sunday 17 July 2011 15:45

I like red hair too, like the orange red and stuff. :)

fiblydinkerton 0

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Tuesday 13 December 2011 22:14

Ur a ginger

iamwilson12 4

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Thursday 5 January 2012 1:15

Most gingers (girl and boy) are really hot.

Filthy_Animal 25

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Monday 29 April 2013 12:13

Red hair is not so common.. Are you sure you don´t have a new brother??

TheKittiesTitays 8

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Monday 3 March 2014 7:09

You're amazing:)

moo_and_bloo 10

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Saturday 6 September 2014 8:54

I've never seen the spelling 'deirbhile', over here it's usually dearbhla ?

ka_mc 0

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Sunday 3 May 2009 23:05

haha gingervitus

stephto 0

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Monday 19 October 2009 4:25

lol! that's a good one. gingers are usually either really hot or really...not-hot. mostly the latter..=|

jazziue 0

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Tuesday 16 March 2010 17:38

two of my best friendsare redheads

lookitsnatash 0

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Sunday 3 May 2009 23:06

I didn't think anybody but Eric Cartman thought so low of red-haired people.

blooop_fml 0

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Sunday 3 May 2009 23:06

You know what they say about eavesdroppers..

DynamicDave 11

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Wednesday 27 April 2011 13:33

No, I don't. Please enlighten me.

IscoreOnU 19

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Tuesday 28 August 2012 7:01

They're gingers!

IWillEatYouAlive 16

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Saturday 14 May 2016 1:03

No, wait! Please tell us! Don't leave us with a mystery!

australiaaaa 0

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Sunday 3 May 2009 23:07

i'm a ginger too :D and i'm a girl i don't care what other people say, i LOVE my red hair

foseberry3 0

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Tuesday 29 June 2010 22:06

you shouldn't...

anonymous496 0

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Sunday 20 March 2011 23:17

your hair is evil

lindsaylu98 0

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Friday 24 June 2011 5:53

SAME!!!!!!!

YLIF 0

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Sunday 3 May 2009 23:07

this sounds alot like the first FML i ever read. it was something along the lines of: Today, I found out that my dad had told my mom he was glad she wasn't a ginger because he hated them and wouldn't even have a red-headed wife. i'm their red headed daughter. FML or something like that.

schadenfreude023 0

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Sunday 3 May 2009 23:07

Ever hear of sarcasm?

trackrunner525 0

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Sunday 3 May 2009 23:08

fucking gingers...jk jk, lol, i don't mind em

slutsstud 0

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Sunday 3 May 2009 23:09

what in the hell is ginger?.. something you put in food?.. god, I feel so stupid right now.

skyttlz 32

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Saturday 15 May 2010 7:54

it's someone with bright red hair and freckles

Einthe 0

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Saturday 31 July 2010 17:00

I've always wanted red hair. I already have freckles. Brown-blonde hair sucks. I really want thick, long, lustrous curly red hair, but alas, there are no redheads in my ancestry.