By Anonymous - 09/10/2012 08:38 - United States - Murrieta

Spicy
Today, I noticed that my penis looks tiny in my girlfriend's hands. Without thinking, I pointed it out to her. Now she thinks I have a small cock, and I think she has man-hands. Either way, we're both turned off. FML
I agree, your life sucks 16 134
You deserved it 36 889

Same thing different taste

Top comments

You pointed out your tiny penis to your girlfriend ... Who may have once been a dude... Ydi

lovepandorasaver 11

Well you single handedly ruined your relationship...

Comments

perdix 29

God, I love that show! And clearly OP is not "master of his own domain".

KiddNYC1O 20

"She had man hands!" I'm watching Seinfeld right now.

ReturnOfTheRat 6

Thank you I was waiting for someone to reference seinfeld!

Wouldn't he notice the man hands some other time before his junk was in her hand? When they hold hands, he doesn't notice she has the handshake of a gorilla? Maybe it's not even the size of his piece, but that he himself has baby hands.

flockz 19

if you need some support, just tell yourself "i can't have a small penis because it's bigger than every piece of maccaroni ever made." that helps me alot.

Actually there is a giant macaroni noodle in JFK Park in Philly. :( Sorry to burst your happy bubble, but I just thought you should be correctly informed. You can still say "bigger than all but one macaroni noodle"! ;)

Of COURSE she has man hands! It's completely improbable of her to think that you have a less-than-average sized penis, when it's very obvious that she has abnormally large hands. How silly of her! I sense a man in denial. Don't worry OP; it's not the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean. Unless your 'boat' is more like a boogie board. ;)

*unfair for her Not improbable of her. Oops.

jem970 19

That sir made me laugh like crazy. Thank you.

Exactly. As long as both are satisfied in the end I don't see any problem with big hands or a small... You should both get over it.

DKjazz 20

38- Unless you have incredible stamina.

bassmanhec 2

How is it not the size? If you can't hit the right spot, then its not what you do with it. Date a midget, its better.

It sounds like that's coming from experience, 67.

Forgive me here Op, but you're with this person because you like them, safe to say? A person can't Normally do much to adjust the size of their hands or penis......this is something you didn't notice or even care about before, so it couldn't have been some obvious monstrosity. So why is this an issue now? Who cares even if you Do have a small penis? Or if her hands aren't little raccoon claws? Really, if both of you are truly hung up on this, then you both are equally shallow and deserve each other. :p Rude I know, and I apologize for that, but if you actually loved her, you wouldn't give a shit. And vice versa. :p

You can turn the lights off but the issue here isn't perception, but rather...size.

Correction... The issue was definitely perception of the sizes. Once it was seen the issues came about.

perdix 29

If she's your girlfriend, your **** is obviously in her "acceptable" range. Her L is more F'd than yours by a score of 2-1. Her beefy hands versus your teeny peeny made it a tie, but then your absolute stupidity to mention how small your dick looks means she is saddled with dating an idiot. . . which is even worse than dating a clever microphallus.

bach2121 13

Is her name Mandy? You can call her 'Handy Mandy'!

skyeyez9 24

Large hands have its benefits. Like playing the piano, guitar, opening jars, swimming, slapping someone.

She should slap OP for saying she has man hands.

So you pointed out your "small penis" on purpose? I think you were trying to sabatoge the relationship and your sub-conscious took over. To begin with, no man ever thinks his penis is small and no man would ever admit to have a small penis, especially to the woman he is currently putting it to... If she wasn't complaining, then there wasn't a problem, but you had to go ahead and make one. May I suggest that you start dating dwarf women. Your penis will always look large in that situation, BUT if it doesn't, keep your mouth shut!