By anonymous - 12/12/2014 01:17 - United States - Gainesville

Today, I noticed that I'm way more productive when I'm drinking than when I'm not. I think I just figured out why I'm related to so many alcoholics. FML
I agree, your life sucks 30 094
You deserved it 3 447

Same thing different taste

Top comments

You might just have the productivity equivalent of beer goggles. If you drink, set a limit. Don't use this as an "excuse" to descend into alcoholism.

Looks like you found the secret to your productivity.


Looks like you found the secret to your productivity.

Some of the greatest people in the world were functional alcoholics, so I guess that's the silver lining.

secret? or maybe an excuse to drink. productivity probably is not any better. just like drunk people say they can drive and are better drivers. I don't think so.

#29 opinions are like a**holes, everybody's got one. Alcohol is a stimulant, then a depressant as the effects sink in. So a heightened sense of awareness, increased productivity, and better driving skills are more than possible at first. Not saying go out and drive drunk to test the theory, I am saying I wish everyone would make more effort to base their opinions on facts.

never said I was basing anything on opinion. I was actually basing it on experience. I don't know anyone who is productive while drinking, whether just starting, or drinking all night. and those who decide to do something "productive" usually **** up what they're trying to do. I don't drink so this isn't about me, just people I've come across in my life.

ChristianH39 30

Alcohol is never a stimulant, it's effects can just feel like one.

#29 In all actuality, my father WAS a much better driver while drinking. It was after he had been sober for three years that he got his license revoked for reckless driving. Yet for the countless years he drank and drove he never got so much as one speeding ticket. ? And that's the only positive opinion I have in regards to alcohol.

I know a lot of people that are more reproductive when drunk, I wonder if that's what OP really meant. :)

Well your drinking is genetic but hey if things work out better with alcohol then keep at it Edit #2 beat me to it

Aw shit. Hope you'll find a way to work around it!!

abraybro 27

Make sure you don't become dependent on the alcohol, OP.

You might just have the productivity equivalent of beer goggles. If you drink, set a limit. Don't use this as an "excuse" to descend into alcoholism.

Dreamsorrow93 24

I'm more productive if I put off all my work until last moment. I get way more done a lot quicker.

kk21days 14

Since when does procrastination have anything to do with the topic of this FML?

Dreamsorrow93 24

The topic is bad and unhealthy habits that make like more efficient. Thus my response fits in since its a bad habit that becomes addictive just as easy.

#7 I too get stuff done better and quicker when under pressure. It's pretty annoying imo. I don't understand the downvotes for your comment.

procrastinating has helped me pass more classes in high school, than anything else.

Well, get productive while sober. It's up to you how much work you put in.

you may be more productive but the quality of your work probably sucks.

maybe it's the rare case of quantity, not quality

Actually depending on what he does, it might be true. Studies show that if you're engaged in creative work (such as design, but less obviously stuff like programming), getting a "buzz" will legitimately increase your productivity by up to 30%. There's a reason why so many of the great artists were alcoholics. Of course that's not an excuse to get blackout drunk- your creative ideas are of no use to anyone if you don't have the coordination to draw them. Plus alcohol is actually excellent brain fuel (second only to glucose), so if you need to do a lot of thinking and don't have access to sweets, a small amount of liquor will do anyone more good than harm. But, yeah, you should look over your drunk work the next day. You know, just in case.

You're better off being adequate than an alcoholic.