Today, I noticed a woman struggling to work a parking meter, so I went over to help. She took one look at me before screaming, hitting me in the face, and running back to her car. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I hit a parked car. I was walking. To make the scene more embarrassing, the car alarm shocked me and I backed up quickly into the parking meter, knocking me down once more. FML
Today, I was sitting in a parked car. A woman was having difficulties maneuvering out. She honked the horn repeatedly for me to move, then looked me in the eye and called me a "f**king bitch", before driving off. I was in the passenger seat. FML
Today, while working as a parking booth attendant, I decided to be nice and give a woman free parking. I said, "Give me a high five and I'll give you free parking, since I already did the paperwork." She said, "I'd rather pay," with a really disgusted look. I also had to redo the paperwork. FML
Today, as I was driving home, I saw a woman get hit by a car. I immediately parked on the side of the road to assist her. I called an ambulance and stayed with her until they came to get her, comforting her all the while. When I returned to my car, I found a parking ticket in my windshield. FML
Today, the only parking spot available at the supermarket had some shopping carts in it, so I got out of my car and moved them. As soon as I finished, a lady stole the spot. When I confronted her, she maced me with pepper spray and walked off. FML
Today, I found a parking spot in front of my work. I parked and another car pulled into the spot just in front of me. The next thing I know, the car in front backs up and slams into my car. Turns out she didn't notice the fire hydrant next to her spot and screamed at me cause I, "stole her spot." FML
Today, while at work, a woman left her credit card at my register. I tried to return it before she left. Seeing her getting into her car, I jogged after her and yelled, "Wait." She ran over my foot. FML
Today, at work, I helped out an employee who was having trouble. I even bought her a bottle of water. After the production manager decided to fire her on the spot, she went out in the parking lot and broke into several cars, including mine. FML
Today, I was on my way to work behind a very slow car. At a red light, the lady came over and punched me in the face for following her too closely. We are coworkers and our desks are next to each other. FML
Today, I saw a woman being mugged. I ran up to help and pushed the guy off of her. She then punched me in the face and called the cops because she was, "just living out a fantasy" and I'm, "a lunatic for trying to help." FML
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Top comments
fanceh 10
that's when you do the same back. stand up, take a look at her, make a terrified face, then hit her and run.
iAmScrubs 19
You forgot to mention the part where you whispered in her ear, "oh yeah baby, work that parking meter."
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Comments (109)
macman23 4
you must be ugly as hell
Thisismypchere 8
Even if he didn't say anything it wouldn't be a problem. he could have waited for her to finish so it'd be his turn
bunnypancakes 5
Are you black?
Person1233 13
Don't bring the watermelon FML into this.
smurfsarwales 9
pedobear!
Capt_Oblivious 10
Should have asked her if you could borrow a knife and a large plastic bag.
Capt_Oblivious 10
*Bag
Person1233 13
Remember kids, hide your boners when approaching old ladies.
Calyx_fml 22
The lesson: don't "help" strangers.
jonmansheppard 9
pedobear!
Tymax 0
boners where is your comment?
rbhockey9 0
Sucks to be a guy. Stranger women never trust us lol