Today, I missed my flight because I was stopped by airport security. They found "small, suspicious, spherical objects" in my purse on the X-ray. After pulling me out of line, taking my purse aside and carefully opening it with tongs, they removed the bag of grapes I had packed as a snack. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML
Today, I borrowed a friend's suitcase for a trip. At the airport, security pulled me aside because there was a small metal object inside. I opened the suitcase expecting something suspicious and found a potato peeler. My friend had used the suitcase for groceries the week before. FML
Today, after visiting my mom, she stuffed a bunch of pads in my backpack so I'd have some at my dorm. When I was going through security, I was stopped and ended up missing my flight. Apparently the jumbo pads my mom sent look exactly like packs of cocaine when they go through the X-ray machine. FML
Today, I packed my bags and left for the airport. When I passed through security, the X-ray scanner discovered that my cat had also come along for the ride. FML
Today, while going through airport security the lady asked why I folded everything so small. I said that I was going away for a month and needed to fit a lot of stuff in only one bag. She smiled, nodded and then dumped my luggage to search for "drugs and other illegal teen things." FML
Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML
Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year-old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML
Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML
Today, while going through customs at the airport, my bag was selected for screening. It was nearly overflowing because it was so full, so before the TSA agent searched it, I said, "Watch out - it's going to explode when you open it". Wrong choice of words. FML
Today, my mother-in-law had concealed in her suitcase a kitchen knife and plastic bags of MSG, salt, and other seasonings (AKA unidentified white powder) because she doesn’t trust foreign food, and wanted to cook her own food on holiday. Airport security were not amused and we missed our flight. FML
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Top comments
dino_witha_cape 0
yeah, if you bite into those things they could squirt someone's eye out
Jcsati8 0
If you pack baby carrots, will they think you are carrying ammo? Damn airport security!
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Comments (203)
AnnaSeptic 0
Haaaa bet they felt stupid. Airport security can be so paranoid. And I'm pretty sure you CAN bring food if it's not an international flight.
confirmpassword 0
YOU AMERICA-HATING BASTARD. WHY WOULD YOU BRING GRAPES ON A PLANE? YOU TOOL.
sbillk02 0
You must never fly. The no outside food rule has been in affect since they instituted the liquid band, 3-1-1 rule a few years back. There also signs all over airports warning of no food or beverage unless it is for babies. Your own fault on this one!
poobear 0
youre not supposed to bring food or drinks in your carry on idiot. and if you have small amounts of stuff like that they ask you to take it out and put it through the xray machine separately. you deserve it
writerxforever 0
ROFL I had the same thing happen to me with an apple. xD
UrStoopid 0
Ugh...this is from the TSA website & it says nothing about food not being allowed because it IS allowed. It also doesnt say anything about grapes or any other fruit for that matter not being allowed! Traveling with Food or Gifts How to Pack Food and Gift Items When it comes to bringing items through checkpoints, we've seen just about everything. Traveling with food or gifts is an even bigger challenge. Everyone has favorite foods from home that they want to bring to holiday dinners, or items from their destination that they want to bring back home. Not sure about what you can and can't bring through the checkpoint? Here's a list of liquid, aerosol and gel items that you should put in your checked bag, ship ahead, or leave at home. Cranberry sauce Cologne Creamy dips and spreads (cheeses, peanut butter, etc.) Gift baskets with food items (salsa, jams and salad dressings) Gravy Jams Jellies Lotions Maple syrup Oils and vinegars Perfume Salad dressing Salsa Sauces Snowglobes Soups Wine, liquor and beer Note: You can bring pies and cakes through the security checkpoint, but please be advised that they are subject to additional screening.
rxxk 0
******* airports. All they do is pretend to keep people safe. They barely look over most luggage, then look carefully at a small few, determine it could contain something bad, and make a big deal out of it, to look like they're doing shit. This is just like what happened to the guy who missed his flight because he had a Macbook Air. It had minimal peripherals, so they determined it to be dangerous. Did you know that it's ok to bring cigarettes and lighters on board?
Polygon 0
its been SO long after 9/11 that any reasonable person knows you at least have to arrive at the airport an hour and a half before your flight leaves, (more or less, depending on how busy your airport it is, whether its a holiday, etc). if you arrived early enough, even if you did get stopped, you should of had plenty of time to catch your flight.
avikakol 0
ugh - you sound like an idiot. i agree with #157, you were probably really stupid and just showed up to the airport 15 minutes early and thought that be okay. grow up and arrive a little earlier next time you want to pack your own lunch.
crvenazvezda 0
"small, suspicious, spherical objects" when you typed that i was expecting anal beads hahaha