Love: Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's...

By Satan - 15/03/2010 23:22 - United States

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 405

You deserved it 9 178

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Same thing different taste

By badwife - 07/11/2009 10:22 - Japan

Today, my husband left his phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being very curious, I called "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 378

You deserved it 17 355

A nickname that sticks

By Anonymous - 24/03/2009 16:18 - United States

Today, I was at my friend's house celebrating his 16th birthday. I couldn't find my phone so I asked my friend's girlfriend if I could borrow her phone to see if I could hear mine ringing. I dialed my number, only to find she had my number saved in her phone as "ASS FACE #3". FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 858

You deserved it 10 525

By phonegotlostinthepark - 03/12/2013 17:54 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I lost my phone. I called the number from my friend's phone, hoping I could find it. A guy answered, laughed "Thanks for the phone!" and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 191

You deserved it 4 137

By Anonymous - 19/06/2009 21:41 - United States

Today, I looked through my girlfriend's phone book and saw two entries with my name. One had "(cute)" attached to it. I checked to see if it was my number. It wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 460

You deserved it 5 396

By Jill - 15/06/2013 04:19 - United States - Santa Rosa

Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 349

You deserved it 22 743

Memory man

By Dad Fail - 07/02/2023 07:00 - United States

Today, my dad let me use his phone. Five minutes later, he had my mom call it because he thought he'd lost it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 683

You deserved it 117

By Soontobeex - 15/09/2009 21:44 - United States

Today, I decided to go through my husband's phone to make sure I invited everyone to the surprise party I was planning for him. There were a few I had missed so I called to let them know about it. The last number I called was his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 578

You deserved it 4 674

By dumbass - 01/10/2009 20:07 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she lost her phone and not to call or text her. After about three hours, I text her phone, asking if she found it yet. I got a reply, saying "Nope." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 760

You deserved it 5 870

Friends like these

By veggocake - 26/09/2009 08:05 - United States

Today, an old friend that I never really liked invited me to lunch while she was in town. While driving back to her car, I couldn't find my phone, so she offered to call it. She found it under the passenger seat and also saw that when she called, her name came up as "Sabrina-IGNORE". FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 804

You deserved it 63 436

By newbffswelcome - 04/08/2013 18:07 - Vietnam - Hanoi

Today, I've been getting calls for over a week on my home phone, cell phone, and the work phone at my night shift, in which someone whispers terrifying Satanic-sounding chants at me. I've now found out that the caller is my best "friend". His explanation: "You seemed lonely, man." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 829

You deserved it 4 667

shessocold 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 9:09

Uh, why did you have to go through the contact list? Don't you know your own cell number by heart?

behindthemask 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 9:04

haha

Comments

KaitHud 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 11:24

Hahaha! Ouch! That speaks volumes about your relationship... or lack there of...

gabbzke 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 11:26

Kinky

sugarbabyxoxo 2

Tuesday 16 March 2010 11:36

bahahaha

brownlace 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 11:44

rofl!!

sasonzal 4

Tuesday 16 March 2010 11:46

probably fake,don't u remember ya number by heart?

CallMeHush 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 11:48

If the OP is satan does she serve hot sammiches?

ImaginaryFoe 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 12:17

I've never understood how people don't know. I've seen people that are genuinely surprised to find out they are universally loathed. Odd.

joints99 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 12:47

hilarious! and I agree with popatia, your ******* face is annoying! How did you fit it in that box?

Jake1595 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 13:09

just laugh

MrC19 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 13:15

lmao ha ha

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Today, a police officer pulled me over while I was riding my high performance motorbike. He asked if I knew why he'd pulled me over. It was too tempting to resist at the time, but in hindsight telling him ,“Because I let you?” was not the best idea I’ve ever had. Cops have no sense of humour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 712

Today, during sex, I was getting close to climax, which is unusual for me due to personal issues. However, I got a piercing headache and had to stop. I later found out my birth control can cause sex headaches and the best way to avoid them is to avoid orgasms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 518

You deserved it 181

The Top

Today, my ex messaged me on Facebook, wanting to be friends with benefits. I’m married now, and he just found out his wife is expecting. She discovered the messages, and I’m now the “home wrecker.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 099

You deserved it 102

Today, my husband jolted in bed and while still half-asleep said, "I had a nightmare; I dreamt we had a kid." I'm 8 months pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 48

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I agree, your life sucks 53 751

You deserved it 5 008

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I agree, your life sucks 38 502

You deserved it 3 526

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I agree, your life sucks 29 779

You deserved it 1 982

Today, I was sitting waiting for my train for a long while. When it finally came, I had pins and needles in my foot. When I got up, I fell and unsuccessfully stumbled towards the train. The doors closed and it left without me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 762

You deserved it 4 602

Same thing different taste

A nickname that sticks

Memory man

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