Today, I let my on-again, off-again boyfriend spend the night. For months we had been fighting about his new flame. After he convinced me that they are no longer an item, we had the most mind-blowing sex then we fell asleep. I awoke to him moaning her name. Followed by pelvic thrusts. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend of three years decided it was finally time to have sex. After we did, he told me that he was sleeping with another girl. He wanted to have sex with me to see who was better. FML
Today, I spent the night with my guy, who I hadn't seen in ages. In the middle of sex, he answered his phone, told me to be quiet, talked to the girl on the other end about how boring his day was, then left the room to finish talking to her. When he came back, he asked if I felt like swallowing. FML
Today, I finally spent the night with a new guy after recently ending a 3-year toxic relationship. The new guy disappeared for 2 hours in the middle of the night, then came back to bed. Turns out he was busy snogging my housemate. I really choose them well. FML
Today, I was lying in bed listening to my neighbors have loud, and what sounded like, enjoyable sex. My boyfriend rolled over and said, "she sounds like fun" before rolling back over and going to sleep. It's been four months. FML
Today, I went to visit my ex to tell him that we couldn't hang out anymore, since I'm becoming serious with a new guy. He picked me up, tossed me on his bed and had his way with me. It was amazing, so much better than with the new guy. FML
Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were in the middle of great sex when he suddenly called out his ex's name. Just before I decided to yell at him and throw him out of my room, I realised he performed better when he yelled her name. So, I let him. FML
Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML
Today, I got to sleep in the same bed as the love of my life...and her new boyfriend. FML
Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML
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Top comments
chefajhatter 1
You deserve it... You should have stopped fooling around with him when you found out he was into someone else.
jem1991 0
friends with benefits five! (scrubs reference)
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Comments (109)
Chibes 0
YDI just because the fact that he's on-again off-again. He was merely using you as a default if he couldn't find anyone better he knew you would be there. Sorry girl, you were just a friend w/ benefits to him. hopefully you learn from this relationship and go on to bigger and better things
azure8787 0
I really don't see how "we had mind-blowing sex" would ever qualify anyone for an FML, unless the qualifier is "but then he chopped my arms and legs off". Just saying.
JENNYBABYY 0
you should have known better.
lolwut_fail 0
I foresee this being the "off" part of your relationship. Give him another few months until you forgive him and have some more sex and then see he's a douchebag again...and then forgive him, and so on and so on. It's crazy, but I'm seeing a pattern.
yoboo310 0
hahhaahahahaha
LittleMiss1 0
lmao!!! definitely!
rachelbrianna25 0
omg. well at least u got some? LOL!
genius_man16 1
I would have to agree, this is a terrible FML all around.
frivolous_nerd 0
what is the point of him committing to a relationship with you, if you'll give him the benefits of a relationship anyway. where is the incentive?
TheLittlestNinja 0
well i hope you dont hold it against him... people cant help what they dream