Work: Today, I hit my boss's car. It's only my second day on the job....

By iswearicandrive - 17/12/2010 05:14 - United States

Today, I hit my boss's car. It's only my second day on the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 271

You deserved it 10 282

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 06/02/2010 19:50 - United States

Today, while I was backing out of the my work's parking lot, I hit my boss's truck. While he was in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 823

You deserved it 23 588

By pgmonster - 21/05/2015 10:48 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I backed into an expensive SUV only minutes after my boss congratulated me for being the only employee to not wreck a company car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 918

You deserved it 5 379

By TJ AJ RJ / IV the V - 21/11/2014 06:11 - United States - San Diego

Today, my boss flipped me off in traffic on my way to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 780

You deserved it 4 112

By sdgsfvbkuhkj - 17/04/2011 23:18 - United States

Today, I started my first day of work at my new job. They had a section in the parking lot for employees only, so I parked there. Apparently, my boss didn't recognize my car, and had it towed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 645

You deserved it 3 105

Cough up

By Anonymous - 06/11/2021 11:00

Today, I dinged my boss's very expensive car. My car wasn’t damaged, so in a panic, I moved my car to another spot and said nothing. Less than an hour later, my boss showed me high definition security footage, so now I either cough up repair money I can’t afford, or I get fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 219

You deserved it 1 859

By in_hardik - 11/06/2012 01:14 - United States

Today, at my workplace, I saw a system crashing. I mean literally, my manager was throwing my colleague's laptop at him while shouting around the office. This is only my second day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 065

You deserved it 1 864

By piece of crap car - 04/01/2017 06:27 - United States - Portland

Today, I was supposed to start my first day of work at my dream job. However, my car had other plans and refused to start. When I called my boss to tell him I was going to be late, he told me not to come in at all and fired me on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 823

You deserved it 1 045

By Ilovelife07 - 14/01/2010 15:14 - United States

Today, I snuck out of work 2 hours early. As I was speeding away so I wouldn't be seen, I rear-ended my boss as he was leaving the lower parking lot for a late lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 730

You deserved it 46 515

By patch91 - 05/04/2011 02:03

Today, I got in a car accident on the way to work. I received an abusive phone call from my boss saying he shouldn't have to cover my lazy ass. I was driving to cover his shift because he was too drunk to show up to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 908

You deserved it 3 178

By Tey - 22/12/2011 00:07 - United States

Today, on my first day of work, I got fired after 45 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 910

You deserved it 17 844

perdix 29

Friday 17 December 2010 14:48

Hey, accidents happen. You can go to the boss's office and explain what happened while your shirt accidentally falls off . . . oops! Problem solved ;)

DocBastard 38

Friday 17 December 2010 14:55

You laughed but have no idea what the joke is? Interesting.

Comments

yumher1 4

Saturday 30 April 2011 3:45

I did that too, ironically.

llamalpaca382 13

Wednesday 18 May 2011 2:17

YDI for bad grammar.

DeadxManxWalking 27

Friday 26 August 2011 1:40

Blond secretary?

car8o8line 5

Tuesday 3 April 2012 5:36

Hope ur not a valet

SkoomaKi 27

Tuesday 8 May 2012 21:03

Not a smart move obviously, better start sucking up!

crystalxa 35

Wednesday 25 September 2013 18:15

oops!

siepar14 7

Tuesday 3 March 2015 7:39

I did the same thing

Keywords

Gamers Annoying Video games Abuse Birthday Relatable Social Media Money Scams Education Parents Kids School Health Public freakouts Mental health Grieving Music Geek Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Bikes Transportation Cops Fight Family Gross Customers Work

The Top

Today, after spotting my ex-boyfriend's truck in a desolate parking lot, I decided to "decorate" the muddy side of it with a rather large male appendage. After checking around me to make sure there were no witnesses, I got to work. I probably should have made sure he wasn't sitting in the truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 280

You deserved it 49 809

Today, we had two of our longest serving coworkers retire at the company I work at, and they hired two young prospects to replace them. The problem? They asked me to train them both for the next 4 months, cancelling my PTO in the process, and then I learned they were being paid nearly 20% more than I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 555

You deserved it 77

The Top

Today, and ever since my boyfriend discovered what a rimjob is, it’s all he’s been asking for, no matter how many times I say no. I can’t be the only one who finds the thought of licking a butthole disgusting and vomit-inducing. Take the hint, no means no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 925

You deserved it 291

Today, I received a package from an unknown address. Inside were doll heads and cigarette butts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 985

You deserved it 2 657

Today, something must be wrong with me. Last night, my dick went limper than overcooked spaghetti while in my wife's mouth, yet today I popped a massive boner that you could hammer nails with, while cutting the grass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 101

You deserved it 3 000

Today, during my wedding ceremony, the groom-to-be found it appropriate to blurt out about an ongoing affair with my maid of honor. They got married instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 606

You deserved it 432

Today, I had to explain to my doctor and parents that I dislocated my shoulder while masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 640

You deserved it 37 988

Today, I found out that I spent a year helping my dad get back into shape, not for his own good health which was what I thought, but so that he could cheat on my mom with 5 other women. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 011

You deserved it 2 416

Same thing different taste

Cough up

Top comments

Comments