Today, I heard what sounded like water against my window, and I couldn't believe it was raining in Southern California at this time of the year. I then turned to the window to see a hobo peeing on my window. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was walking downstairs to the subway. At the top of the stairs, some hobo was peeing. Two seconds before, I'd told my friend I felt rain. It wasn't rain. FML
Today, I discovered that the stream of water that periodically falls onto the ground outside my apartment window isn't actually water. The guy above me regularly pees out of his window onto his balcony. FML
Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML
Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML
Today, from the balcony of my apartment, I watched helplessly as a teen came along and peed through my car's open window. FML
Today, I heard water dripping at the back of our house. I went to investigate, only to find a man peeing on our garden gnome. FML
Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML
Today, I felt rain on my face. I looked up and saw a man peeing out of a hot air balloon. FML
Today, I opened my window due to the good weather. I was lucky enough to listen to the sounds of someone violently throwing up for over an hour. The window got stuck open. FML
Today, a hobo threw up on my car while at a red light. He then asked me for money. FML
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Top comments
_kyleG_ 34
It's always so sunny in Cali- even the showers are golden!
ironmany_fml 23
i am pretty sure that peeing on window and rain on window do noy sound the same... but what do i know.. i have never had someone pee on my window before. . :P
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Comments (57)
MetalxSoldier 26
Sorry op. I think everyone will agree(R. Kelly excluded) that rain is better than golden showers any time.
abNormal62 23
Yell Stop that right now or urine trouble!
Stillo 25
You are the first pun related comment that actually got plus votes :D
thisisbutaname 38
Seems it never rains in southern California Seems I've often heard that kind of talk before It never rains in California, but girl, don't they warn ya? It pours, man, it pours
martin8337 36
It is said that silence is golden, now you know that other stuff is too.
The_Skittish_One 27
Unless you were horrible to the hobo at a previous time, I don't understand how anyone could think you could deserve this. Icky :( I hope that is not a regular occurrence!
more4me 27
Well I am in San Francisco and coincidently we did have REAL rain 2 days ago! (For those of you who do not know why it's a big deal , California is in a severe drought right now and it's only rained less than 10 days each year for the past 3 years!) And yes, there are also people peeing in the street, sadly. But I have never experienced someone peeing on my own window ! How disgusting and creepy!
kikoma 32
We can't be 100% sure when OP wrote that, whatsoever, they must be happy for the rain if you guys had real rain 2 days ago.
trell000 13
I bet that pissed you off.
WaltzingPhanthom 23
Is your window extra close to the ground or is his dick bigger than hulk's?!
chrisseesyou 11
sounds like it's time to move
buttcramp 21
I feel like if the homeless person knew they were seen, they'd be embarrassed enough to not come back. If they do, tell the police. Moving is a huge hassle for such a seemingly small problem.
thejonac 21
go outside and show him that the territory's already been marked