Today, I had to tell my ex that I'm pregnant with his baby. I sent him a casual "Hey :)" text to try to ease into things. He replied, "WHO THE FUCK IS THIS?" and ended up threatening to make my life hell if I don't tell my new boyfriend that the child is his. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Bad news
Today, I called my ex and told him I was pregnant with his child. He was thrilled, going on and on about how much he wanted to be a dad. I had to tell him I was going to abort it. FML
Condom advertisement
Today, my ex messaged me, saying he got his new girlfriend pregnant and that he thinks I have something to do with it. He thinks I put it in her head that they should have a kid together, when he says he didn't want any in the first place. FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend, saying, "Hi." His response was, "I got your best friend pregnant." FML
Today, my ex dumped me for his ex who'd cheated on him. Today, I also found out I'm pregnant. When I told him he said, "I’m really happy for you. I hope it all works out." FML
Surprise!
Today, my boyfriend’s ex found out I was pregnant. Her logical response was to have her teenage sons jump him as he was coming home from work. Now we’re filling out a police report instead of our baby registry. FML
Today, I called my ex boyfriend to tell him that not only am I still in love with him, I'm also three months pregnant with his child. Upon hearing the news, he swore, called me a pathetic liar, swore some more, and hung up on me. FML
What will people think?
Today, I turned down my boyfriend's proposal because I'm pregnant and I told him I didn't want people thinking that's why we were getting married. He… did not react well. Yes, he knows that I'm pregnant. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend to let him know that I'm pregnant. He instantly replied "Bullshit!", then hung up and apparently skipped town. FML
Revelations
Today, I got a message from a woman. It was my boyfriend of five years' ex-girlfriend, telling me that she’s pregnant with his baby and that they’ve been together for a year. FML
Slipped up
Today, I told my girlfriend that my ex is pregnant, but not to worry because it’s not mine. That’s how I inadvertently told her I’ve been cheating on her with my ex. FML
Top comments
Welshite 40
DNA test, and child support. If he doesn't want to take responsibility for his child, force him.
PrimeEvilTahir 24
F her life? No, F the life of the poor soul she's bringing into this world. People really need to start thinking straight before getting into sex. Lives seriously depend on it!
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Comments (122)
Philerup31 12
Time to call the Maury show
somekidbrandon 5
some of you take these comments way too seriously
cre8tvlylicnsd 14
I can't tell if the ex is telling OP that she better tell the new boyfriend that the baby is his (as in, for the ex). Or, if he is telling her to claim the baby as the new boyfriend's. From the d-baggy nature of the boyfriends threatening response, I'm assuming it's the later....
plunkit 6
Birth control. It's a thing. look it up.
rocker_chick23 27
Birth control can fail. My son is a condom and pill baby. How about you look that up and stop judging, asshole
plunkit 6
Judging? on fml? that's all that's going on.
skipper2009 18
Is it in the papers? On the web? Your personal story? If not then shut up. You probably ****** up something anyways. Taking antibiotics, putting the condom on wrong, etc.
sailorarctic 22
YDI for a multitude of reasons. the first being not using protection while you were having sex or/and if you were then YDI for not using plan B when the protection failed. Also, YDI for telling someone news like that via TEXT. Seriously, grow a backbone and dial the number. And finally, the ex has now made it clear he doesn't want the child. If you feel the same then terminate, don't torture yourself or your new Bf by carrying another man's child to term and don't you date lie to your new BF either. However, as sathing as this comment is, I'm not totally heartless. So, in light of that, if you do decide to keep the child then keep those threatening texts as well. they'll come in handy during a court case for either a paternity test/child support or "god forbid" restraining order.
MrsPlague 11
Wow... Are you stupid? Obviously. First of all, let me state that birth control and condoms don't always work. My fiancé and I conceived with both at two separate times (and it was the shot, not the pill). Secondly, plan B is horrible on your body, and isn't very effective if not used hours after. Aside from that, it's disgusting how much people rely on it. Seriously, look up what it does to your body. Instead of looking like an ignorant shit head, why don't you just keep your pathetic mouth shut? Thanks.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
"YDI for a multitude of reasons. the first being not using protection while you were having sex or/and if you were then YDI for not using plan B when the protection failed" Perhaps, she wasn't aware the protection failed. A condom doesn't have to visibly tear open in order to allow the semen through. All it takes is one tiny hole letting a few drops through, drops which can easily be masked by vaginal fluids. It's also possible that she was using birth control pills which failed her or spermicide film/fluid which failed. In any case they could have finished up that rousing bout of sex which knocked her OP under the belief that whatever birth control they were using had done its job completely. Also it's possible for Plan B to fail. A few hours can be the difference between it successfully stopping you from getting pregnant and it failing. Damn, a bit late. I was apparently typing at the same time as MrsPlague posted.
MrsPlague 11
OP, every child is a blessing. Even if his/her biological father is a shit piece. **** him, you don't need his help.
rocker_chick23 27
Tell that to a rape/incest victim. I guarantee you will get your ass kicked. I am no ashamed to say I aborted my rapists spawn at 11 years old. That baby would have not been a blessing
rocker_chick23 27
Oh, and before you call me a baby killing baby hater, I want to tell you I have a 5 year old, and I found out I am pregnant tonight and I couldn't be happier.
helloworld012 2
He sounds horrible but playing devil's advocate, you can't have sex with assholes and when it results in a baby expect him to be positively receptive to it. I hope things do get better though.
ileenefudge 29
I know how this is firsthand Hun, it sucks because as with anything with the government, it's a process so it's best to start right away on that. Oh and keep those messages in case they are needed.
rocker_chick23 27
Wow, there is a lot of **** shaming on this thread. You **** shamers should be ashamed of yourselves judging someone without knowing their story.
flame5768 14
my god. you're comment is so ironic. i can't begin to explain how funny this is.
rocker_chick23 27
I am not the one judging the OP or **** shaming, am I?
PrincessCastiel 27
:(