Today, I had to take my fiancé to the hospital so they could remove a tampon applicator that he claimed he somehow "fell onto". It was lodged up his nostril. I'm marrying this man in a week. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML
Today, my fiancée decided to go on a "vacation." Our wedding is tomorrow. FML
Today, I put a tampon in. The string broke. I had to go to the hospital to get it out. FML
Today, while fighting with a girl I hate, my nose piercing got a little loose and I ended up snorting it in. That same girl had to take me to the hospital for surgery. She told everyone afterwards. FML
Today, I'm at the ER for my first ever UTI and potential other "down there" issues. Yesterday I got married. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to pick his nose for him. FML
Today, I went to my cousin’s wedding and started tearing up during the vows. I reached into my purse for a tissue but accidentally pulled out a tampon, which flew across the aisle and landed right between the bride and groom. It's probably going to make it into the wedding video. FML
Today, I had to stop my 26 year old fiancé from picking his nose and eating it like a little boy. Three times. FML
Today, my sister attacked me and stuffed a Tic Tac up my nose. I'm currently in the hospital waiting to have it removed. FML
Today, I picked out a massive two-inch long ingrown hair on my chin. I called my girlfriend in to take a look. She saw it, shrieked, then fainted, cracking her head on the toilet as she fell. Hello, hospital bill. FML
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Top comments
jimbob_76592 5
Maybe he was having a nosebleed?
poppunkismylife 9
I fall onto tampons all the time!
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Comments (72)
thereseg69 7
Sucks to be you!
BellaBelle_fml 23
Not really. She's marrying the man that she loves and has chosen to wake up next to him every morning for the rest of her life and she is marrying someone that is a bit silly and likes to have a bit of fun. Their marriage will probably be full of fun, silliness, love, and laughter. And that's a pretty cool feeling to have. I'd say she is a pretty lucky woman and he's a pretty lucky man to be marrying a woman that will put up with his shenanigans and will probably join in on his antics sometimes.
perdix 31
Where did the tampon go? In his lung?
skyttlz 32
Read.
graceinsheepwear 34
61, It doesn't say where the tampon went, only where the applicator is.
mangoboy1 19
I've done this before...but with play dough...and I was 5.
SamCat 21
I wonder how big his nostrils are? How hard did he push it in?
igive 29
A better question is: "why insert tampon in nose?"
Imhere4fml 24
To stop the bleeding, duh
SexPot143 13
ummmmm. Good luck?
Jessj958 19
That is hilarious! But I do understand the embarrassment OP. I wanna know how everything turned out!
buckdharma 38
You're getting married in a week? Just think, if you can get him to make this a habit, you'll have a convenient string coming out his nose to lead him around by.
Kallian_fml 21
Nostril? Oh thank god. As soon as you said "fell onto" my mind went to unspeakable places.
chanellgymnast 17
Maybe he was watching "She's The Man".
grandpuba 6
Wow nostril... As I was reading this I was pretty sure OP was gonna say it was lodged in a different orifice