Kids: Today, I had to explain to my teenage daughter that no, the dishwasher...

By wow - 23/06/2011 08:53 - France

Today, I had to explain to my teenage daughter that no, the dishwasher didn't make the glasses shrink, I'd bought smaller glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 807

You deserved it 6 203

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Same thing different taste

Irony failure

By alcoholic - 31/10/2009 14:30 - Estonia

Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 822

You deserved it 51 682

Psycho

By deadgirl - 15/05/2021 01:59

Today, I accidentally broke one of my mom’s favorite glasses while she was away. My dad saw and offered to tell her instead that he broke it, because, "let’s face it, if she knew it was you, she’d shove the glass shards down your fucking throat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 564

You deserved it 118

Get the message

By thelandofoz - 14/10/2009 14:36 - United States

Today, I noticed that my clothes had shrunk. My mother seemed to be having trouble with the new washer and dryer so I tried to show her exactly how they work. After my explanation she said, "I know how they work. I shrank your clothes to give you some incentive to lose all that belly you got." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 885

You deserved it 7 663

By Anony-moose - 11/10/2011 09:43 - United States

Today, I had to explain to a patient that no, her nipples were not slowly getting smaller. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 141

You deserved it 2 570

By DeepFriedLettuce - 29/04/2016 01:33 - United States - Vashon

Today, I had to explain to my seventeen year-old daughter that deep frying food doesn't "melt the calories." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 442

You deserved it 1 518

By smarterthanmymum - 26/05/2011 09:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to explain very slowly to my mum why she cannot put metal cutlery in the microwave. She did it anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 265

You deserved it 2 984

By Anonymous - 30/03/2014 10:04 - United Kingdom - Romford

Today, I asked my daughter to buy me two pints of milk. Apparently, the shop only had four-pints, so she got that and poured half down the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 773

You deserved it 6 912

Time out

By Starfucks - 17/12/2015 02:55 - United States - Bensalem

Today, I was in Starbucks with my daughter when she noticed a travel cup she liked. She picked one up and asked for it, but I said no because it was expensive. She angrily slammed it back into its stand and in the process, knocked over a display of ceramic mugs. I had to pay for each broken mug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 867

You deserved it 4 538

By Anonymous - 31/05/2016 15:30 - Canada - Saint John

Today, I fell down the stairs while holding some dirty glasses from my room. I ended up pulling pieces of glass from my body. Meanwhile all my mom cares about is the fact that I broke three of her favorite glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 244

You deserved it 1 837

By Glassless - 26/05/2017 20:00

Today, I lost my glasses. I don't have spares but my girlfriend said I could borrow hers. She doesn't understand why this won't work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 140

You deserved it 486

alki_fml 5

Thursday 23 June 2011 16:03

its not so cute when its your teenage daughter....maybe if it was a 5 year old..

enonymous 8

Thursday 23 June 2011 16:27

My glasses are made from 100% pure cotton... shrinks every time in the wash

Comments

klong91 7

Thursday 23 June 2011 22:20

if she's older than 10 she's a ditz

EvilDave 13

Thursday 23 June 2011 22:36

You raised her, so it is your own fault. YDI.

melibear89 7

Thursday 23 June 2011 22:38

a lot of people look smarter than they let on. she just might act dumb to get attention.

cjgqsmooth 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 23:01

is your daughter Jillian from family guy?

ifeelya 5

Thursday 23 June 2011 23:08

so how is that to be FYL? That is quite cute unless she's 16, then FYL.

illneedasaviour 0

Friday 24 June 2011 4:35

the FML clearly read "teenage daughter"...

caaitlynn1 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 23:17

wtf

kristledaigle 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 23:20

teenagers haha. is she a blonde?

jessi030304 0

Friday 24 June 2011 0:05

that kid has a bright future

staggman13 0

Friday 24 June 2011 0:10

I hope that she's pretty

R_Willy 5

Friday 24 June 2011 0:35

wow how dumb is she

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I agree, your life sucks 842

You deserved it 88

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I agree, your life sucks 48 982

You deserved it 8 781

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I agree, your life sucks 9 165

You deserved it 951

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I agree, your life sucks 1 303