Today, I had to explain to my seventeen year-old daughter that deep frying food doesn't "melt the calories." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to explain to my daughter that just because it says non-toxic on the crayons, it doesn't mean that you should eat them. She's 16. FML
Today, I had to explain to my daughter that no, just because the word, "salad" is in the name, it doesn't mean that macaroni or potato salad are automatically healthy for you. She still doesn't believe me. She's 19. FML
Today, my 16-year-old daughter burned all her baby photos because they were unflattering and made her "look fat". FML
Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old daughter why she can't pull a duck face pose for her driver's license. She still doesn't believe me. FML
Today, my 17 year-old daughter told me she was going to bake a cake. When she finished, she offered me some, but it was crunchy. I asked her why and she said the recipe said to put eggs in. She put them in whole. FML
Today, I had to explain to someone that all beverages, except plain water, actually have calories. They weren't too happy that their milkshake diet was over before it began. FML
Today, I found out why my daughter eats so many sugary baked goods. According to her, when you bake things, all the sugar and calories are "released" and so you can't gain weight from it. It seems I raised a moron. FML
Today, I reprimanded my daughter for eating too many chips, since it's not good for you. She responded with, "Know what else isn't good for you? Two cigarettes a day." I couldn't even come up with a retort. I can't believe I just got burned by a ten-year-old. FML
Today, my daughter put a doll in the microwave "to keep her warm". She's 17. FML
Today, I had to explain to my teenage daughter that no, the dishwasher didn't make the glasses shrink, I'd bought smaller glasses. FML
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Top comments
False_Stupidity 42
Oh my, It just goes to show that common sense isn't necessarily a genetic trait, or that common. I hope she is not super impressionable and believes everything she reads or hears, although it's looking like it.
vikky538 29
Except for the rice. Its adds trans fat and reduces the carbs in rice.
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Comments (33)
mattyiscool123 26
Little known fact: it's actually vice versa
bad_boyfriend 10
This is pretty sound science if you ask me
pharm121 21
Well I guess there's no need for those college applications now. Haha. Jk.
neuronerd 29
Oh how I wish it did...
RageWolf16 31
Should've let her gain weight and wallow in stupidity.
xx000o 27
Sounds like you and them there skhools ain't been doin to good a job ejucating her.
ShleeG 23
She's just a dreamer. Nothing wrong with that lol
sandman676 20
OMG
rojita369 17
If I ever find a genie, I am making that one of my 3 wishes!
myabeth 11
hahaha I wish!