Today, I had to explain to my one person on my staff why having kids aged 6 to 9 hammering in screws with the butt end of a screwdriver is neither safe, nor a good idea. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I had to explain to my 27 year-old sister why a stainless steel fork isn't a good toy for my 8 month-old baby. Twice. FML
Today, my husband told me he didn't want me to get power tools to build things, because he thinks a miter saw and a sanding orbiter are more dangerous than guns. FML
Today, our 9 year-old son managed to shoot himself in the gut with my nail gun. According to my wife, this is completely my fault, because I ONLY kept it in my locked garage, ONLY secured in its box, ONLY completely disconnected from the power, ONLY on the highest shelf near the roof. FML
Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML
Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML
Today, I had to explain to my son why it is not okay to slap old women's butts. He's 16. FML
Today, I had to explain to my little sister that not all guitars are supposed to have a hole in them, that when I was talking about "breaking it in" I didn't mean I'd smash a hole in it, and that she shouldn't have taken a hammer to my expensive new guitar. FML
Today, I asked my wife to keep our toddler confined while I hung a shelf. Of course, she didn't, and he came in and picked up a screwdriver. I tried to take it away, and he ran off giggling, only to trip and slice his forehead open. According to my wife, this is entirely my fault and she is taking him to her mom's. FML
Today, I learned the hard way that if you tell your child that they're old enough to cook their own food in the microwave, you have to make sure they're smart enough not to put the metal spoon in with the food as well. FML
Today, I managed to staple my finger while showing my kindergartner class how to properly use one. FML
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Top comments
bigsc 0
there are so many things wrong with that
ilaleahcim 6
There are so many things wrong with this sentence.
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Comments (86)
TurboLCR 0
you should have saved your breath, and explained how the hunting for a new job works. dumb shit.
ryankon518 3
you could easily rearrange the words to this sentence and you would have one very dirty sentence...
MissBunny25 0
I'm gonna say OP was high as a kite when they wrote this.. cause this is hella bad and typically I dont give a **** about grammar or anything.. but wow... dude wheres my hammer?
Doortje 30
This has to be the worst written FML in the history of FML.
Rainbow35 6
How does nobody understand this FML? Someone that works for/with OP had gotten a bunch of little kids, and made them hammer screws into something, using the handle of a screwdriver instead of a hammer. Make sense? It just doesn't seem badly written to me, but then again, maybe I wouldn't know. :P
bitchslapped22 14
eheh.. 6 to 9 ;)
ArthursLifeSucks 2
"But timmy, the peg is square but the hole is round. It won't fit!" "Just keep hittin' it!"
MissBunny25 0
hahahahaha pardon my dirty mind
Calyx_fml 22
Children should not bang and screw.
kornhead09 0
child labor much cheaper
sunnysurfchick 0
you sound like a real dick head! let the kid do it, if it's not hurting anyone who cares....besides you dick head!