Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend that taking triple the maximum dosage of painkillers won't actually triple its effects. She rolled her eyes, called me clueless, and said that I should "leave this stuff to the professionals." She's studying to become a doctor. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I told my step-mom that my medication is causing me to lose weight. She looked me up and down and suggested I triple my dosage. FML
Today, the medicine I keep at my desk for headaches is now gone thanks to my coworker who took the last 6 Advil at once. Her reasoning? "You're thin, so you wouldn't need them anyway. I'm twice your size, so I needed twice the dose." FML
Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML
Today, my roommate was complaining about a headache, so I offered her some aspirin. She looked at me like I was stupid and said, "Uh… That stuff's only for heart attacks." I'm living with an idiot. FML
Today, my mother won't give me any painkillers for my migraine. She believes that "When medicine goes into your stomach, the acids stop the medicine from working" and that "It's all in people's heads when medicine works". FML
Today, after a 20-minute conversation, I'm still unable to convince my grandmother that Tylenol and Acetaminophen are the same thing. I just graduated med school. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML
Today, after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I woke up from a much needed nap realizing I should take my pain medication. My mother then told me she had thrown them out so I wouldn't get addicted and become a drug dealer. FML
Today, I went to the hospital for crippling back pain that made it impossible to walk. The doctor was more interested in telling me off for not taking a pill that he admitted doesn't help acute pain. He then gave me an injection that wore off in an hour, and sent me home, telling me to take over the counter meds. FML
Today, I kindly explained to a client that she had calculated her CD interest wrong. She kindly responded that, as a nurse, she would never give me medical treatment if I was involved in a car accident. FML
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Top comments
rg350dx 29
Write this moment down and remind her of it in four years and ask again who's clueless.
DocBastard 40
Cryptic17 - No, the thing that will increase is the concentration if the drug in her bloodstream, and when you increase the plasma concentration, you generally increase the response. SapphireVelvet is right - OP IS clueless.
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Comments (168)
diaosi 4
Well I know that taking three Vicodin instead if one definitely used to make me feel three times better.
DocBastard 40
Why exactly do you think that 3x the dose WOULDN'T cause 3x the effect? By your logic, taking half the regular dose wouldn't change the effect either. The only clueless one here is you, OP.
CeeCee_fml 16
Thanks for the clarification. I was scratching my head because it seemed like what the girlfriend said was right.
chichmode 9
Ha, DocBastard! Believe it or not, i saw this was a medical related post, and thus scrolled down a page (which I never do) to find you post. You have a following, lol. But, lets admit, this is a half truth. It depends on the medication and the dose prescribed... The analgesic effect may have different kinetics than that of a side effect, both mostly of which are sigmoidal with respect to treatment effect, and it's impossible to know whether they're on the linear part of the curve. The guy may be right, or he may be wrong, we don't know.
chichmode 9
*your post *sigmoidal with respect to medication dose (not treatment effect) Totally missed the 2 minute editing window! Lol
Marty20612 5
Omg my cousin just said that she's in school to be a doctor too lol
Kk_Waylen24 21
Ah! Hopefully she doesn't overdose!
EventCats 6
Based on all these wonderful comments, I fear I might have a doctor that is just like her...
ExperimentV 9
Dammit, Jim! I'm a doctor, not a pharmacist!
randombleeps 11
she obviously won't pass medical school
randombleeps 11
haha she is going to fail medical school
artyler 3
Is she actually in medical school, or is she pre-med? There is some good info on here, and a lot of bad information contained in the comments. That being said, if she is either pre-med or in med school, either way she isn't the "professional" here. If the medication contains acetaminophen then she is foolish to triple the dosage as it can and will cause liver damage. Other drugs it depends on how much the body can make bioavailable. A quick example (not a pain killer) is vitamin B12. It doesn't matter how much you take, your body will only absorb the amount that she has interferon to take up the B12, and the rest is metabolized out without being taken up. Tripling the dosage of opiates can make you forget little things, like how to breath.
artyler 3
Intrinsic factor, not interferon. Very long day.
NoOneLovesYou 13
Considering that I come from a family with borderline addictions to acetaminophen, I can honestly say that the "max" dose listed on the bottle is harmless. Need further proof? All the 14-year-olds who try to commit suicide with it tend to be absolutely fine. Yes, in large enough doses it can cause damage, but it's not nearly as easy as people act like it is. If it was, it wouldn't be so easily obtained.
artyler 3
The max dose of acetaminophen is 4000 mg in a 24 hour period. If you triple that dose, and exceed 7000 mg of tylenol in a 24 hour period, and if you do not get N -acetylcysteine therapy, you will suffer severe toxicity, and irreversible hepatic damage. I know, your experience with your family far outweighs my medical education and experience treating patients, but that is my input.
buckdharma 38
Doctor, please, some more of these Outside the door, she took four more What a drag it is getting old