By soon to be divorced - 24/10/2013 20:06 - United States

Spicy
Today, I had to call a plumber out to clear a blockage in our bathroom drainpipe. After coming back from work later in the day, and after a tearful confession from my wife, I found out that pipe wasn't the only one he snaked. FML
I agree, your life sucks 61 245
You deserved it 4 086

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Call his company and tell them he's fraternizing with the clients. Get his ass fired.

At least she was honest and told you immediately instead of covering it up for months or years.

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Damn OP that sucks. Kick her out and burn the bed

Jeez, what did the bed do to deserve such horrid treatment? I say you kick out the bed and burn the wife... ;-)

I like your violence. If you ever feel like you don't need it anymore, I'm in the market for good sociopathic tendencies...

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#77, two wrongs don't make a right. I really do feel sorry for OP because his marriage may have suffered a terrible blow...

His wife reads too many romance novels..

If only they told me plumbing had those benefits

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There are long comments, and then there is #117

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Thanks for the psychology lesson, #117

117: I have a psychology essay due tomorrow, thanks!

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As much as I hate to admit it, I really hope 117's comment gets buried so future readers of this thread aren't inconvenienced.

117 you just described trevor from GTA V lol

117, as a Halo fan, you're a disgrace to your comment number. Also, why was that necessary?

Dude, that's his wife

I had to scroll for ages just to thumb that comment down.

As someone who lives with a crazy stepmom, it was nice to see an accurate description and know what she's defined as now

Hie is just luck that she told him the truth. Instead of never telling the truth and living with a wrong person.

Wow, you just described my late mother!

Dude, I'm glad you're educated in psychology. That's very cool, and it's great to have knowledge. But one thing even I've learned about social interaction (and trust me, I've never really had any actual 'friends' so I don't know much) is that the two key things are CONTEXT and KNOWING YOUR AUDIENCE. That interesting stuff about psychology is better suited to posting in a community that is dedicated to that sort of thing - here, people just find it annoying. I completely sympathize with your desire to share your knowledge - I can barely go a day without telling people about my animals and listing tons of facts about them. I know I'm going to get tons of thumbs down for making this comment long and detailed, so bring it on.

Don't worry 241. You're comment wasn't nearly as long and it didn't disgrace a Spartan.

I am afraid of what #117 because some of those might be apparent in me most of the time...

But he didn't...

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How can it not be ? She cheated which means she broke the trust and her vows

Yes, but not everyone wants a divorce for 1 incident of cheating it's not the same as a full blown, planned out affair. He may decide to work in their marriage instead, maybe not.

Sorry 42, but cheating is cheating. It doesn't matter if someone planned to cheat or not, if you're willing to hurt your significant other like that, then you don't deserve to be in a relationship.

I agree with 42. It is one thing to hold these black and white ideals, but when it happens, you have to decide if your marriage is worth some gray and forgiveness. For me, I wanted to work on my marriage, despite having previously felt that if he cheated once, I was gone.

If the FML was a man confessing to his wife about cheating, then everyone would be saying "divorce his ass right now" and "don't bother with him". True story, the FML community very biased these days.

54, I agree. She completely broke the trust in the marriage. It doesn't matter if she planned it or not, she still did it. How do you trust your spouse if they cheat so easily? I think I might actually be more worried if my spouse cheated on me impulsively than if they entered into a flirtation with someone else that eventually led to sex. Personally, I feel that if my spouse cheated just because they were horny and someone was available, there's a chance that they've done it before, or will do it again. A flirtation leading to an affair takes some commitment, random hookups with the plumber take none at all.

its up to the OP what happens to the marriage. I've seen couples that have worked through it when one cheated and other couples haven't. Personally my ex cheating was juzt the end of a long line of horrible behavour and I decided I had enough. I hope the OP does what's best for him.

Why isnt this the top comment? :P

ok, sorry to sound patronizing but a word to all these 16-23yo commenters saying that a one off with a plumber should end a marriage... Trust me, when you've been married and committed to someone for many years things get a lot more complicated. And you're wrong 67, a spouse gradually falling in love with someone else is FAR more lethal for a marriage than this. I'd say the instant confession is a good sign - at least she's honest and where there's honesty you might be able to rebuild trust. OP I don't know how long you've been married but think hard and maybe see a counsellor.

Watch out everyone, Mr. Big Shot 32 year old here to lay down the fucking law. Sorry sir, next time us youngsters should ask for permission before giving our opinions, right?

151, I disagree. That much impulsiveness shows a lack of commitment, and I'd be extremely converned that it had previously happened and the guilt became to much so my SO had confessed to just this one indescretion, or that they might do it again. We'll just have to agree to disagree.

Also, I know that to you, you probably wouldn't consider it "many years," but I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years, and I'd personally feel much more worried if he cheated impuslively rather than flirtation leading to cheating over a period of time.

To be honest. humans aren't monogomous creatures. most people have and will cheat in any long term relationship, wether emotionally or sexually. the fact that she confessed outright instead of hiding it means that she felt so much guilt over the situation that there may be hope for the marraige. Cheating shouldn't be the initial cause, the inability to be hnest and upfront and show remorse, that should be the reason to divorce. Shit happens.

You know, you can repair a relationship after someone cheats. It doesn't have to end, if both WANT to repair it, anyway.

yeah I'm an asshole

221, I believe that this comment is unwarranted. I too believe that a relationship is worth saving. Whether two people have been together for 4 days or 40 years. If both parties want a relationship to work then it will. Any underlying issues need to be dealt with, no holds barred. I hope that you find a silver lining in this black storm cloud.

Plus, the "tearful confession" is a crock. If she was really sorry for what she'd done, she'd have shut up about it. "Confessing" is usually a passive-aggressive strategy to cause your partner more pain (letting them know picked someone else over them), while forcing them to forgive you because "you're sooooooo sorry"…at least until the next time.

I am 17 and my opinion has been stated to be worthless by someone in this thread because of my lack of life experience. I will state my opinion regardless because I know myself well enough to know that no matter what age I am, I will still feel the same way. If I was cheated on by someone that I loved with all my soul it would destroy everything. I would still love that person but not in the same way I did before. If I left him I wouldn't be able to leave the thought of him betraying me for the rest of my life, because I will always love him. And if I stayed it would never be the same and I couldn't possibly let it go. I don't even want to think about that happening honestly. I don't even flirt with guys now because I would feel guilty for giving them false expectations. I can't imagine how someone could cheat on someone they care about or love. I hate how we excuse it by saying it is human nature and we are animals because that is bull shit. Does anyone have any honor?

I do believe the username says it all

his username is "soon to be divorced"

Call his company and tell them he's fraternizing with the clients. Get his ass fired.

yes and at least you see what kind of person she is now so you can move on when ready to someone better

There are a lot of plumbers that are self employed so I doubt it would really matter. Or I can also picture the guy pleading with his employer "Come on, boss! She wanted it! And I got paid to do both jobs! If her husband was taking care of his wife. . . Blah blah blah" (Unfortunately-- It's a different world out there for some)

Yeah, I thought about the possibility that this guy is his own boss. In that case, OP can report him to the BBB, and post scathing reviews about him in every outlet possible. In business, one's name is everything. OP can still ruin him.

Pssh... This guy could quit his day job and become a porn star. I mean damn, he created the scene by himself now all he needs is cameras. He could start up shop right now. He'll be rich by the end of the year. I see it now.. "Plumbing Your Wife" or "Phat Assed Plumber Sluts". Seriously though, fuck your wife OP. Kick that bitch to the curb. I hope you take all her shit in the divorce. Good luck, pal, you have my condolences..

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His wife cheated and this guy knowingly had sex with a married woman. They are the only people who look bad in this situation.

You think like that because you're sweet and have a good heart. That's not what people are truly going to think. (Like I said-- "unfortunately")

Well those people are assholes and who cares what assholes think? In the end, ideally, this guy will be out of a job and OP will be rid of a cheating wife. This OP will come out on top...ideally. When my ex husband cheated on me, I felt no shame telling everyone I knew what an adulterous asshole he was, and when the divorce was finalized, I felt like a winner.

*Thus. Stupid Swype!

Gee although my ex cheated it still hurt when we got divorced. I was best to be rid of him and I had no shame but there was still some pain.

104, There was pain in the beginning of the process, but by the time the divorce was finalized after four months, I was just glad to have cut all ties with him. But the fact that we'd only been together for 3 years (including our 1 year marriage) and the fact that the entire relationship had been a thinly veiled living Hell made things easier. I imagine it would have been much more difficult if we'd been together for decades or if the majority if the relationship had been pleasant. Likewise, things may be difficult for OP now, and it may take him much more than just a few months to get over it, but eventually he'll just be glad to be rid of her and will feel much better about the whole situation.

And if he owns the company as a lot of plumbers do

My wife and I have been married for sixteen years. We have six kids. I don't know OP's situation, but I would be hard pressed to just walk away from my marriage. I would have to give my wife a second chance, but our lives would be a living hell for a while. When I was younger, maybe I could have left. But not now.

I don't see how that's the plumber's fault. He's not the married one...

A man/woman should not have sex with someone's wife/husband. It puts equal blame on both adulterous persons.

Had the same thing with my ex wife. She cheated I but her ass on the bricks. Now I'm so much better for it!

160. How would you know if the plumber was or was not married?

How do we know the plumber knew she was married? Even if he did know, maybe he wasn't thinking of it at the time. From my point of view, she's the one who is really responsible for her own faithfulness.

Guys, OP said "I" called a plumber. He's a man. The plumber arrived and there was a woman at the house. My guess is that OP gave his own name when he called, so even if the plumber isn't the one who took the call personally, the plumber would have to be a complete moron not to put two and two together. Unless there's some other unusual circumstance, I'd say it's more likely than not this guy knew he was messing with a married woman. And in any case, that's pretty unprofessional behavior.

I bet she told you how sorry she was. Tell her how sorry you are as you light her on fire

Then put her out with Draino.

It's not murder if they're putting her out.

It's not murder if you leave her within an inch of her life

Yeah, in that case OP would actually be SAVING his wife's life. She doesn't deserve someone so heroic.

Or assure her you'll feel just as sorry the first time you screw another woman, with the implication that you'll be doing that as soon as you find someone you're sufficiently attracted to.

I'm glad this has escalated to murder and abuse of the wife. How primitive. Divorce her & tell his company so he's fired. End of.

At least she was honest and told you immediately instead of covering it up for months or years.

Still doesn't make it better.

I'm curious if this was a revenge thing. Did she want to "tearfully confess" and hurt her husband. I've heard that there's usually a particular marriage issue that makes a woman cheat. Then again, maybe she just has really poor impulse control.

But it could have been going on for years. If she got piped by the plumber, no saying who else she's laid down for.

A tearful confession on the day it happened would make me think it was the first time. Women tend to dismiss relationship problems in order to keep the peace until it becomes too late. I'm sad for both of them.

That's some relationship issue if her solution is to screw some guy she's known less than an hour while he's at work.

This probably wasn't her first time since she was able to let herself go to someone she literally just met so quickly. She could have a problem and it may be hard for her to control. Her confessing is guilt built up, but may also be a cry for help. Sorry OP

Do you live in Porn World?

Lol! I thought the same! Sounds like some shit from Brazzerz!

Whats brazzers. Miley Cyrus's new album?

Miley Cyrus was offered a 1 million dollar deal to direct a porno. I was hoping she'd be in it though.. I would not mind seeing what's under Hannah Montana's clothes.. But I'm a dirty bastard so I wouldn't mind seeing what's under most women's clothes.. ;)

Yeah........

112- check out her photoshoot with terry (Jackson or Robinson???...something like that) But I was thinking the exact same thing #7 OP can't live in reality. At least not the same one as I do.

#116 the name you're looking for is Richardson, and that guy is beyond creepy, if you believe the stuff written about him.

What did she get up to with the mechanic?

My picture. Your comment.

51- Your name. My lunch.

Your picture. MY DINNER!!!

Your username. Your vag.

Again...my picture. Your comment.

Her comment. Your picture.

Damn...I'm sorry, OP. I agree with a previous comment, call the company he works for.

Take the final plunge in your relationship and end it!

No way! Keep her around. Put her in charge of your "finances". She can exchange services for services and you'll never have to pay a plumber or mechanic again! ;) Of course you'd also NEVER be able to sleep with her again.

I think OP's username says it all for that one... : - Sorry 'bout that OP, you deserve better.

I would find that man, and clean his pipes! ...with my fists I mean.

Sure you would, dear. Sure you would.

*whips out opera length black latex gloves* Let's just leave this one to the professionals, yes?