Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, I got in an argument with my wife. I told her that I feel like she immediately disagrees with anything I say. She immediately disagreed and said she never does that. FML
Scapegoat with fries
Today, after an argument, my wife goes out to cook her curly fries in our airfryer. The thing beeps after 15 minutes; my wife goes out and announces, "Oh that's great." "What's up babes?" says I. "I put the fries in the wrong compartment. It's all your fault, you wound me up earlier." she says. FML
Sensitive
Today, my wife is giving me the silent treatment and has locked herself in the bedroom, all because I politely asked her to put the dishcloth away when she was done with it. FML
Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML
Tetchy
Today, I got home and my wife asked me why I hadn’t taken the bin out or cleaned the living room. I asked her why she hadn’t done it since she got fired 6 months ago for laziness and since then has sat on her ass watching daytime TV instead of job searching. She threw a mug at my face. FML
Fight clubbed
Today, my wife picked a fight with a guy twice my size, then expected me to “man up and teach the bitch a lesson.” I’m not insane so I of course refused to fight, then she locked me out of the house for embarrassing her in front of her sisters. I want a frisking divorce. FML
My love language is…
Today, I asked my wife for a kiss. She snarled, "I'm your WIFE, just fucking kiss me! You don't have to ask!" Later, I went in for a kiss and she slapped me, then yelled that it was my fault for "getting in her face." FML
Get your act together
Today, my girlfriend snapped at me for being lazy and incompetent, and declared that if I was going to behave like a child, she would be treating me like one. This includes safety-proofing the house, talking to me like a 3-year-old and slapping me with a wooden spoon when I do something wrong. FML
Cold dish for dinner
Today, as soon as I got home, my husband said he was hungry and that I needed to cook. I flipped my shit and yelled at him for a good half hour. Later, he pulled out his phone and showed me videos of me doing the exact thing to him, asking him to do things the second he walked in the door. FML
Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML
Top comments
influenza54 1
Tooo bad it wasn't an iron skillet. LOL he deserves it
IdolChatter 0
Yeah, his command was an act of genius & worked out so well didn't it. He's lucky she didn't come back with a butcher's knife.
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Comments (394)
allihall127 0
YDI for thinking that you can tell her what to do. She's not your property, you have no right. Good for her!
dollarstorepwnr 3
it was a joke... and his wife overreacted... i the situation was vise verssa, then I would say the same thing... so go to the kitchen and make me some lunch please :D
tfiggs 0
Next time tell her to do it, or youll put your hand down.
uallsuckatlife16 0
What you said was perfectly acceptable, shes a woman, therefore she should make a sandwich or dinner because thats the only thing women are good at other than in the bedroom. THis is not sexist its called the reality of life
mike1921 0
Obvious troll is obvious
loveisnever 0
wrong choice of words when you told her to "get back in here." All I have to say is that you'll think about what you're saying to her in a fight next time. Lesson learned.
jayjay777 0
What's with all the YDIs? Even if he was being a douche, I'm sure it DIDN'T call for something like getting hit in the head with a frying pan. **** all of you who are saying YDI, you're all sexist. Your life sucks dude, I'm on your side ;)
Ianslilgoofball 0
Wow. You people are idiots. I don't care if what he said was sexist, what she did was assault. If a man had come and slapped her across the face for a sexist remark, everyone would be crying "OMG DOMESTIC ABUSE." But because the 'victim' is a woman, her retaliating violently is okay? What if he got seriously hurt? ****. I hate double standards for both genders. He's an asshole for making a comment, sure, but she's a crazy bitch for acting violently. God most of you make me lose my faith in humanity.
ironie_fml 0
@185 Shut up. Just because you're a "manly" man doesn't mean that you can justify your opinion by calling it "the reality of life." Who says that women can't be anything useful to society? Why is it that only men can be accepted as the leaders of the community? I don't agree with what the OP's wife did, but his sexist comment sent evolution back to the 20's, when women barely did anything to stop this oppression. Why can't you understand that men and women are equal? **** you.
flinkpamingo 0
You, sir, are a dumbass! No man with half a brain would EVER say something so asinine! as⋅i⋅nine –adjective 1. foolish, unintelligent, or silly; stupid: It is surprising that supposedly intelligent people can make such asinine statements. 2. of or like an ass: asinine obstinacy; asinine features. Origin: 1600–10; < L asinīnus, equiv. to asin(us) ass 1 + -īnus -ine 1 Related forms: as⋅i⋅nine⋅ly, adverb as⋅i⋅nin⋅i⋅ty /ˌæsəˈnɪnɪti/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [as-uh-nin-i-tee] Show IPA , noun Synonyms: 1. See foolish.
growingupnextmon 3
You got done by a troll =).
miharu365 0
...Pain is funny no matter the gender of the person recieving it.
mordantennui 0
Get back in the kitchen and make her a forgiveness sammich!
WriterGirl 0
FTW! Go Girl. Also, hope the door hits you on the way out mister, bit more poetic justice, =P