Today, I got yelled at by a bleeding-heart hippy in the restroom for using paper towels. Apparently I'm a "tree-hating, paper-wasting bitch". I had a nosebleed. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was using the toilet. I was still insanely pissed off over an argument with my girlfriend, which kind of explains why I was wiping my ass so furiously that my fingers broke through the tissue and ended up in my ass, causing me to shriek like a little girl. FML
Today, my psycho boss snatched a file from my hand so aggressively that I got a papercut. She then scolded me for bleeding on the papers. FML
Today, I ran out of toilet paper in the bathroom. I was forced to use tissues to do the job. As if that wasn't bad enough, the sanitizer in the tissues gave me a rash that made me have to stand up frequently in the lecture hall. Several people asked if I had Tourette's. FML
Today, I strained so hard while on the toilet that I gave myself a nosebleed. FML
Today, I was in a bathroom stall and someone had left their dirty tampon rolled up in toilet paper on the top of the paper dispenser. I felt obligated to dispose of it, so the next person didn't think I left it, because there was a line for the stalls. Fuck you, asshole. FML
Today, I nearly got written up for "publicly humiliating" a coworker. All because I left a note in the restroom asking whoever keeps peeing all over the floor to please be considerate of other people. FML
Today, in a public restroom, an elderly lady started bitching me out for not washing my hands. I was so intimidated that I did so under her accusing watch. I'm quite intolerant to many soaps, and I now have a horrible rash on my left hand because I was too frightened to explain. FML
Today, I walked into a public restroom and, to my utter surprise, saw a lady squeezing blood out of used tampons. We made eye contact, she continued, and I ran out in horror. FML
Today, as the clock struck twelve for the new year, I was in the bathroom having a nosebleed. FML
Today, I woke up bleeding from every orifice in my body. I've got a nose bleed from my medication, my gums bled when I brushed my teeth, I'm on my period, and I have hemorrhoids. FML
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Top comments
mt631 18
Use their shirt instead.
ArgentumAurum 24
Grab a few more while looking at him
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Comments (123)
madeline9322 17
I thought hippies were peaceful.
SailorBen 6
And Texas of all places. I don't suppose you were in California when this happened were you?
Pix3lJunk 12
Something similar happened to me with a guy at the mall where I live, he spend all evenings in the mall telling people how bad they are for not been "green" I punched the guy in the mouth after he yell at me something after I throw used napkins in the trash. He sees me now at mall and he turn the other way.
lilycups 11
You probably use paper towels even without a nosebleed, no? Just the wrong place at the wrong time.
The_Waffletime 1
I would stare at her right in the ******* eyes and dump the whole damn roll in the garbage
dipshitpoopyhead 7
you should have given the hippie a nose bleed
Lexipants 21
Think I would've given THEM a nosebleed...and then watched them struggle to solve it cleanly without using paper products. Muahaha.
FANGSINURFACE 2
Ahahahaaaa. that makes most of us tree haters.
saffy66 34
Ask them if they use toilet paper - and offer to save yours for them to reuse if they're that worried.
iMuffinKat 16
Geez. Yeah, I get that they love the Earth and want to save trees and stuff, but what about themselves? They probably use paper everyday, what else would they write with? Or, let's say, they go #2. Do they just waddle around without using toilet paper?