Today, I got stuck driving behind a rather large motorcyclist on a one way road for 30 miles. For those 30 miles, I had a full view of his back fat rolls and butt crack. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got fired. To make things worse, I had to sit in three-hour bumper to bumper traffic, waiting for a wreck to clear on my way home. In front of me was a fat man with a hairy butt crack on a motorcycle. I was forced to stare at a fat, underwear-less man's ass for 3 hours. FML
Today, I was driving 65 on a fairly deserted highway when some speeding inbred in a giant truck chose not to use the open passing lane but instead SWERVED INTO THE SHOULDER to go around me, and then cut me off. Any closer and I would've been a smear on the asphalt. FML
Today, I was on my motorbike 200km from home, in the middle of nowhere, when I needed to poop, so I found a wooded area and did my thing. As I was climbing back up, I knocked my helmet from its perch and watched it roll right into what I’d just left. FML
Today, I was forced to spend three hours looking at a fat guy's butt crack, seated directly in front of me during an exam. I'm pretty sure it lowered my grade. FML
Today, I rear-ended someone while trying to watch my odometer hit 80,000 miles. FML
Today, as I was driving to work, I glanced in my rear view mirror to see an old man behind me using binoculars to see in front of him since we were stuck in a huge traffic jam. He rear ended me. FML
Today, after finally getting up the nerve to take my motorcycle to up 75 mph on the freeway, I made it off in one piece, only to fall off my bike in the mall parking lot. FML
Today, I was smoking in my car and flicked the butt… into the face of a cop on a motorcycle going the other way. FML
Today, I almost got run over on my bike by a truck who raced through a red light. After narrowly avoiding a collision, the car slowed down. Instead of apologizing for almost killing me, the driver stuck his head out of the window and yelled, "Nice ass!" FML
Today, I had to spend a long bus ride with my chest pressed against the window, because some mammoth of a woman decided to squeeze her double wide ass into my seat. FML
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Top comments
Angelice_fml 0
It's times like these that I wish there were such a thing as memory bleach.
ThaBeasty01 5
30 mile one way road ? where do you live .. china ?
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Comments (78)
tabarnak_fml 7
Fat guys aren't made for motorcycles.
Ferretface 13
Motorcycles aren't made for fat guys.
mrlopez 13
Well, either way fat guys aren't made for fat guy...uh well it's the same anyways...
zephyrum 0
That's kinda nasty...
cosmosis 12
Only kinda?
dhardesty23 8
man has self confidence. who knows maybe he is a go getta.
WeAreScrewed 3
Might be wrong, but couldn't you have just gone around him?
P_to_the_AM 9
"one way road"
KiddNYC1O 22
Shoulder.
muhaidib 2
True, you don't need two lanes to pass a bike...
dbugboy 8
was he eating a twinkie??
Capt_Oblivious 10
Some people pay money to see that shit. There is a fetish for everything.
SpeshulK 0
Did the fat rolls act like a parachute and slow him way down? Because then you could add being late to that list of problems
perdix 31
How did you control yourself? I thought for sure you'd have to pull over at some point and "rub one out" after being treated to such ample man-cleavage.
sandmancometh 3
And he still looks cooler than you cause he's on a bike ahahHaaa
thelifeofbritni 0
Oops!! That might have been my dad!! Torturing people since he learned to ride.