Today, I got so lonely I decided to make sock puppets and play with them. I played for four hours straight, only to be interrupted by a phone call. I didn't answer because my sock puppets were "on a date" and I didn't want to stop playing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was so lonely that I pretended I wanted to buy something from a telemarketer so that they would keep talking to me. FML
Today, I was so lonely I called my stalker ex-boyfriend. He was too busy to talk. FML
Today, I spent four hours practicing funny voices. I have literally nothing better to do all day. FML
Today, I was so lonely, I wound up talking for two hours to the creep who calls my number every Friday night and makes creepy obscene breathing noises on the other end of the phone. Turns out he's a better listener than my husband. FML
Today, I was supposed to go on a date. I have been playing solitaire the whole night waiting for him. Out of 15 games, I've won one. FML
Today, I had a video call with a couple of old friends, but the conversation sort of got boring, so I started mouthing words so they'd think the connection was bad and end the awkwardness. Then, as soon as they hung up the call, I realized I'd left my music on in the background the whole time. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure to cheer myself up. I've been so lonely, I got overly excited when someone sat next to me, because I got to pretend I had a friend. FML
Today, I felt so lonely that I went on an online chat website and pretended to be a girl just so someone would talk to me. FML
Today, I realized how lonely I am, when I got a call from an elderly women who had dialed the wrong number. We ended up having a 20 minute conversation about her cat and how he "just won't use the darn litter pan." I was sad when she had to hang up. FML
Today, I was so lonely, I tried to get into bed noiselessly while pretending I had a boyfriend asleep in it. FML
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Top comments
Catkam623 27
Hey sock puppets are real people too. Well not really and based off my prior logic why were you third wheeling?
gc327072 31
It ended well. They have a real close-knit relationship.
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Comments (133)
Japie89 3
I would do anything to have an imagination like that! Never could play with (sock) puppets, because I just don't have the creativity...
TungstenLildog 10
Its free to put it on YouTube - make a video, put it up, find out if it is entertaining (could be entertaining, could be useless... no money invested) - could be a new weekend career.
LuckBeNimble 19
yes! and then everyone at FML would have their answer as to whether you're an adorable, yet socially awkward person that just needed a push of support to find your place in the world, OR a mentally-disturbed sociopath with a sock fetish.
poccocurantes 7
Sock ****! The great thing about that is if you curb the language you could probably get a PG rating.
hanacurse 11
The phone call was probably telemarketers.
False_Stupidity 42
She could at least have a real conversation with the telemarketer, even if its about the ab-crunch pro 2000... And if it's a hot sounding, male telemarketer, even flirt a little, to take his mind off selling ;)
Serisent 26
Bad puns like that deserve no thumbs...
fdupagain 11
The date ended with the conception if a little socklet.
brittragz 10
Fyl I guess but hey you do what you gotta do lol
onorexveritas 24
you say you were lonely and your savior called but no, sock puppets is what you chose
Satoaoi 13
aww
skyeyez9 25
Everybody needs a hobby. My husband teases me for being an "old lady" because I like to crochet. I crochet figures like pokemon, bears, cats, paddington bear vs clothing type of stuff. Sock puppets are different, but whatever makes you happy. Just dont let it consume your life.
ksks1234 33
Just think, if the sock puppets hit it off, they will get married and have sock puppet kids. They might get a sock puppet car and/ or dog, then you will never be lonely...or out of socks.
ksks1234 33
*sock puppet cat...stupid fat thumbs.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
well they might need a sock puppet car to transport the sock puppet kids and dog....