Today, I got paper thrown at me because I didn't agree with my classmate's conspiracy theory that Brian Griffin's death was planned by the illuminati. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was sitting in social studies and someone threw a note at me. It said "Go fuck yourself, everyone hates you, just die." FML
Today, one of my classmates got bullied and the whole class got to wrote 2000 words about that. FML
Today, I got kicked out of English class shortly after our teacher told us we have to write an essay on how the storyline of Harry Potter is one big allegory for "the futility of socialism." Apparently, reacting with disbelief makes me a "disruptive influence." FML
Today, I was sitting in class when I overheard a group talking about how much they don't like me. When they saw me there, they burst out laughing. FML
Today, my so-called friend snitched to the teachers that I was the admin of the school confessions page and I got scolded after school. FML
Today, at school, I got in trouble for plagiarizing on a paper. The subject of said paper was where I see myself in ten years. FML
Today, I was called everything from a communist to a nazi to a national traitor for suggesting that kids shouldn’t be forced to recite the pledge of allegiance at school until they’re old enough to truly understand what it means. Someone even threatened to kick my ass for speaking up. FML
Today, a student set me on fire while I was lecturing my class about proper lab safety. FML
Today, my teacher assigned us teams in a class debate. I landed on the team that had to argue the obviously wrong point of view. When I finished, my teacher told me and the entire class how much I disturbed her, and how I reminded her of Hitler and Napoleon. FML
Today, I was in class when all of a sudden I was hit in the head by a metal pencil case. My teacher threw it at me to get my attention. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DocBastard 40
You had paper thrown at you? PAPER?? NO!!! The horror! Anything but the paper! What will the bullies do next? Whisper vaguely inappropriate obscenities in your direction?
WompWompWomp123 7
Surely, you cannot believe that he was hit by a car on accident?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (74)
Horris 3
******* spoiler alert?
SWC_Penguin 17
Agreed. It's ok to say that something was thrown at the OP, but now that I know it was paper this story is totally ruined for me.
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
It's a miracle that you've made it this far through the total shitstorm the internet has become since he died without finding out. It was all over my newsfeed on Facebook and several news websites within an hour.
Enslaved 38
If you don't already know that they killed off Brian's character from the show, you're probably not a big enough fan that it should matter now. :P
whyusofat 17
I heard the death wasn't/isn't permanent.
DocBastard 40
You had paper thrown at you? PAPER?? NO!!! The horror! Anything but the paper! What will the bullies do next? Whisper vaguely inappropriate obscenities in your direction?
HowieDoIt 21
Or rhyme her name with mean words, like "amy is lamey." That poor girl.
xiiels 1
hahahaha exactly what I was thinking!
perdix 31
If it was the Illuminati, they'd have throw bits of tinfoil at you, coated with traces of mercury and plutonium. Wait, I wasn't supposed to say that...
Sinistra_Blue 12
That's what *THEY* want you to think... (Like that? Did I do it right?)
centaursTesticle 19
stop with the "omg paper oh no how hoorrrible" sarcasm being ganged up on by a bunch of your classmates throwing paper at you for disagreeing with an absurd opinion is cruel op, next time you have a silent but deadly fart coming up, stand next to one of them and let them take the blame for it, 'cause clearly they're all douchebags
cryssycakesx3 23
one person is totally being ganged up on.
DocBastard 40
Yeah, you're right. Being sarcastic on a website is much worse than calling people douchebags and suggesting that OP blames a fart on them. Based on your vengeance tactics, I have to assume you're about 11. I should call your parents to tell them that you're trolling a website for people with the maturity level higher than a gopher.
buckdharma 38
If we want to find out the truth on this subject we must hear from Olpally.
olpally 33
Nope, not going to hear a word from me. Pretty stupid FML.
eddeeezzyy 19
It is the illuminati because on that Saturday of the same week, Paul Walker who played Brian O' Conner on the Fast and Furious series died in a car accident. Notice how two people named Brian both died, and both their deaths involved cars.
karlcolt45 19
HUSH! do you want to get everybody in this thread KILLED? they'll know that you know and you told us so now we know! ...too soon by the way
olpally 33
Oh, people are this stupid? Throw it back at him! Haha.
perdix 31
Hey, maybe they'll bring in Ted. I'm talking about the bear from the movie and not Ted McGinley who is pretty much like hospice care for sitcoms.
SMHsohard 22
Speaking as a Hospice Nurse, I take exception to that statement. Ted McGinley is NOT like Hospice for sitcoms. He's more like Dr. Kevorkian.
NOTWmonkey 5
Illuminati is a secret society I hate when people go they killed this person and this person no they don't do that they are a secret society that tells people what to do thy have other people tht kill they don't kill
perdix 31
I don't know about killing, but *raises eyebrow* THEY certainly do go around stealing punctuation marks off of people's keyboards.
karlcolt45 19
^ this guy knows too much,,,, we save all the punctuation for ourselves!!!!!!......"""
SMHsohard 22
If Illuminati is so secret, how come everyone knows about them? Unless that's what they WANT us to think...
ahh_rats 15
It's official! Free schooling is a fucken joke