Today, I got out our electric fan because it was very hot. A cockroach crawled up behind the frame on the fan and fell into the gap of the frame. It got itself killed by the rotating fan, and had its blended flesh sent flying all over my white polo shirt. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, there was a gigantic wasp in my room. It stupidly flew upwards and got hit by the rotating fan. It then immediately decided to take it's revenge by stinging me. FML
Today, I turned on my A/C for the first time in a couple of months. A family of ginormous cockroaches climbed out of the air vent and a few clumps of dead cockroaches fell to the ground. FML
Today, I was cooking dinner when I noticed a cockroach on the kitchen counter. I reflexively tried to spray it with what I had to hand, which was window cleaner, but it seems to have pissed it off and flew right at me instead. I screamed and ran out of the kitchen, leaving the roach in charge. FML
Today, I decided to bring down a very old fan from the attic. I plugged it in, and as soon as I turned it on, tiny spiders were blown all over my room. FML
Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML
Today, I was sitting in my garage with a fan on my face because it was hot when a suicidal cricket decided to jump into the blades, causing his cricket guts to be sprayed onto my face. FML
Today, I walked out the back door of my place of employment and looked down to see a huge cockroach. This is quite a normal occurrence, so I thought nothing of it until I realized it was struggling to drag the corpse of one of its friends into the building. FML
Today, I saw a cockroach on the ceiling. Immediately I got a stick to smack it down. When I hit it, it fell and landed in my mouth. Karma much? FML
Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML
Today, as I was driving, a massive cockroach clicked its way across my windshield. I pulled over to fling it out the window, but it spread its wings and flew around like a hook-armed stabbing machine. I lost it in the dark car and now I can't find it. It's going to be a long drive home. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
alienc 0
hey at least you weren't doing the thing where you say stuff into the fan because it makes everything sound funny, just saying could've been worse than just the polo shirt.
RachelHellYeah 0
No
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (182)
sccrismyantidrg 4
At least it didn't spray in your mouth OP.
jrl13 0
This sounds kinda fake..... a cockroach can live 7 days with its head missing, and can withstand between 67,500 and 105,000 rems of radiation. How is a fan made of some plastic crap gonna kill it?
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you're being sarcastic.
auto_da_fe 2
Well, with that logic they should be able to stop my foot from crushing them.
JABabY 0
Omg ugh ewww, that's sad...
Theblue_fml 0
Thts disgusting but u can still wash it and if tht doesn't work, bleach it
supaisu 0
at least it's dead!
niatimes 0
that is soooo gross!!!! 3wwwwwwww! but u be ok jus wash it and go on about yo bizness
ZomgWeAreClubKid 0
I wouldve started screaming. >.< poor roach lol.
BlueTwist89 0
YDI for having a cockroach on your fan?
fmlbrooo 0
113, Why else would she call her a ****? She sees a pretty girl with bigg boobs, and kicks her down when someone else compliments her. She's practically screaming out "I'm Jealous".
katecookieface 0
YDI for wearing a polo shirt. Especially a white one.