Today, I got a spray tan for homecoming. While I was dancing, I got really sweaty and the spray tan rubbed off on the guy's white tux. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was getting ready for the school swimming carnival and was running very late. I reached for my deodorant and sprayed it on. It was only when I was at the pool that I realized I had accidentally grabbed the spray tan and covered my underarms in it. FML
Today, I went to get my spray tan before my semi-formal. After I applied lotion to the bottom of my feet as instructed, I went in the booth and began to start the tanning session. I lost my balance and fell right as the machine began to spray. I look like a spotted cheetah. FML
Today, before a big formal banquet, I went tanning because I wanted to look good in my cocktail dress. I got out of the tanning bed only to realize that I had left my socks on. FML
Today, I used the tanning booth for the first time. Not only was I so white that I received first-degree burns all over my body, but I also forgot to remove my knee-high socks. FML
Today, while running late to my sister's wedding and rushing to get ready, I accidentally grabbed my travel size shaving cream can in place of my body spray, and quickly drew a blue foaming line across my rental tux. FML
Today, I got a spray tan for the first time. Naked, I climbed into the booth. When the machine started I became frightened by the loud roar of the spray and couldn't breathe. I pissed myself out of fear. I now have river-like streaks down both legs where the pee washed my tan away. FML
Today, I was tanning by the pool. My friend put his arms under my back and knees and picked me up. He threw me across the kiddy pool to my boyfriend, shouting "Catch!" My boyfriend didn't catch me. Instead of a tan, I have a huge bruise. FML
Today, I decided to get a spray tan. I'm now more orange than the current president of the United States. FML
Today, I decided to spray tan myself. Five minutes later, I had to pee, so I did. Not only do I now have two orange stripes on my toilet bowl, but I also have two big white stripes on the back of my thighs. FML
Today, I went out clubbing with a few friends. A cute guy pointed at me from the bar and motioned for me to come over. I was excited and did just that. Turns out he just wanted to ask me if I'd thought about seeing a doctor for my jaundice. No, I just overdid my spray tan. FML
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Top comments
FFML_314 12
YDI for getting a fake tan. Period.
Marvin_Android 0
Sounds horrific. At least you used a spray instead of natural sunlight, thereby dodging cancer. Unless, of course, that spray tan causes cancer in your species as well. That wouldn't surprise me at all. It would just be par for the course: you dodge one thing just to throw yourself at something worse. Life. Don't talk to me about life.
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Comments (154)
KansasCity 0
YDI for going with a guy who wears a white tux. Tanning fail.
erik02gutierrez 0
f his life for getting fake tan crap on his suit and also f his life for having an oompa loompa as his homecoming date
nuts_in_your_fac 1
HDi for wearing a white tux. Yes, a douche. was he trying to be ironic? Unless it wasxa 1850's dance, and it was a dinner jacket with black trousers . . . then he sucks. Oh, how the orange of your face must have looked next to his white jacket. . . Did your silver eye shadow drip onto your date as well?
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Agreed! The silver eyeliner bit made me lol. I pictured John Travolta's white leisure suit from Saturday Night Fever, though, instead of a dinner jacket. :}
nuts_in_your_fac 1
was 1950's my fingers are too big.
catatonicsleep 17
If the tux is rented he's in trouble... I wonder if he will send OP the dry cleaning bill...
TashaLenaKitty 0
YDI,honestly you're dumb for getting a spray tan why not go TO A TANNING BED?! lol
Godless26 1
or just sit out in the sun, instead of being a dumbass and paying for something that occurs naturally
5t3ff1k4h 47
@ both of you - Yeah, because skin cancer's all the rage right now.
Godless26 1
so you would rather cower indoors all the time in fear of cancer? i would rather live my life and not be such a pantophobe
5t3ff1k4h 47
I don't have a fear of the outdoors. I don't know how you gather that from my point that outdoor tanning will lead to skin cancer. I'm outside all the time, but I'm in the shade when I can be, I wear a moisturizer with SPF, and I don't lay outside and bake.
Dragons_corner 6
glowstixz alive and I agree fake tans are stupid real ones are better.
Dragons_corner 6
where did the z come from? I hit xx twice well it could be xxx
Independantlove 0
uhhhmmmm. ew? not the fml, but the fake tan. girlie if you are white, try going outside and get some sun instead of post up on fmylife.com ;) just sayyyiiinnn 0:-) fml 4 the white tux date ydi though OP
karimkz 0
even if u were a girl and that touched me id stick u