Today, I got a phone call from a detective in response to my stolen car that has been missing since St. Patrick's Day. He told me that he had found my car, but was chuckling the whole time. Turns out, I had parked my car in a different lot. I haven't had it for a week. It was never stolen. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML
Today, I couldn't find my car in a mall parking lot. After 30 minutes of searching, I reported it stolen to the mall security. It turns out that I'd parked it on the opposite side of the mall. Security escorted me to my car, all while giving me pitiful looks. FML
Today, I found an empty parking space in a crowded parking lot. When I came back later, a lady and a cop were standing by my car. Her car used to be parked there and got stolen. They think I'm involved. FML
Today, I was arrested by the police for sitting in what they thought was a stolen vehicle. After being slammed into the back of a squad car at gunpoint, they realized the car was actually recovered a week ago. FML
Today, I took the bus after work. When I got to the remote parking lot, I realized my car had been stolen so I called the police to report it. When they came to take a statement and asked me when was the last time I saw my car was, I replied, “This morning, when I drove it to wo… Oh.” FML
Today, my boss reported to the police that a suspicious car has been parked outside the store late at night. I walked outside and my car was gone. He had my car towed. FML
Today, I was approached by a policeman who asked me if I was the owner of the green Camry. Turns out my parents decided to teach me a lesson for lying where I had been by reporting the car stolen. They also wouldn't answer my one phone call. FML
Today, I finished my shopping at Costco, and realized I'd forgotten where I had parked. After scouring the parking lot for 20 minutes, I called the police and filed a report for a stolen vehicle. I then remembered I had bought a new car yesterday and parked it right next to the entrance. FML
Today, I thought my car had been stolen because I couldn’t for the life of me find it in the office car park. I panicked and called the cops, only to remember I had taken my bike to work. FML
Today, my car was stolen from my driveway. I reported it to the police, the insurance company, and my neighbors, and begged for help via social media. As I walked to catch a bus, I saw my car parked outside my school. I forgot I left it there last night. FML
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Top comments
zachary918 0
Well, on the plus side you still have a car :)
fourwheelsoffury 0
Sounds like someone drank too much on St Patty's hahaha
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Comments (73)
Deuce600 0
"Dude! Wheres my car??"
mydadpulledout 17
I was thinking the exact same thing!
underscore_ 0
so you went to the bar real drunk and forgot where you parked
lyssa121693 0
someones a dumbass drunk.
Hgm09 0
Haha. I doubt you were in any condition to drive, though. It's probably for the best.
dcapp 0
someone was traaashheeeddd!
realhorrorshow88 0
Hehehe I like FMLs with a happy ending once in a while. Detective must've thought u were such a retard.
goodtimesx2 0
thats really sad. nice job captain crunch, you win the big idiot of the day award. Your lucky they found the car
krunkrooster 0
I am sure it was leprechauns, and had nothing to do with alcohol. That's what you get for stealing gold from short irish dudes. DESERVED!!!!
sor_machine 0
wow. well atleast your car is ok :D
des1988 0
blackout