Today, I got a phone call from a detective in response to my stolen car that has been missing since St. Patrick's Day. He told me that he had found my car, but was chuckling the whole time. Turns out, I had parked my car in a different lot. I haven't had it for a week. It was never stolen. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML
Women be shopping
Today, I couldn't find my car in a mall parking lot. After 30 minutes of searching, I reported it stolen to the mall security. It turns out that I'd parked it on the opposite side of the mall. Security escorted me to my car, all while giving me pitiful looks. FML
Today, I found an empty parking space in a crowded parking lot. When I came back later, a lady and a cop were standing by my car. Her car used to be parked there and got stolen. They think I'm involved. FML
Busted
Today, I was arrested by the police for sitting in what they thought was a stolen vehicle. After being slammed into the back of a squad car at gunpoint, they realized the car was actually recovered a week ago. FML
Classic case of the Mondays
Today, I took the bus after work. When I got to the remote parking lot, I realized my car had been stolen so I called the police to report it. When they came to take a statement and asked me when was the last time I saw my car was, I replied, “This morning, when I drove it to wo… Oh.” FML
Today, my boss reported to the police that a suspicious car has been parked outside the store late at night. I walked outside and my car was gone. He had my car towed. FML
Busted
Today, I was approached by a policeman who asked me if I was the owner of the green Camry. Turns out my parents decided to teach me a lesson for lying where I had been by reporting the car stolen. They also wouldn't answer my one phone call. FML
Where is my mind?
Today, I finished my shopping at Costco, and realized I'd forgotten where I had parked. After scouring the parking lot for 20 minutes, I called the police and filed a report for a stolen vehicle. I then remembered I had bought a new car yesterday and parked it right next to the entrance. FML
Classic
Today, I thought my car had been stolen because I couldn’t for the life of me find it in the office car park. I panicked and called the cops, only to remember I had taken my bike to work. FML
Today, my car was stolen from my driveway. I reported it to the police, the insurance company, and my neighbors, and begged for help via social media. As I walked to catch a bus, I saw my car parked outside my school. I forgot I left it there last night. FML
Top comments
zachary918 0
Well, on the plus side you still have a car :)
fourwheelsoffury 0
Sounds like someone drank too much on St Patty's hahaha
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Comments (73)
500_error 0
I've heard that thieves sometimes take your car to commit a crime, then return it nearby so as to cause doubt that it was ever stolen.
Raq_fml 0
Sadly, I have done this. Except a coworker 'found' my car on her day off while she was shopping. She called up to work to tell me. Even sadder is the fact that a friend was with me at the time of its disappearance, neither of us remember parking it elsewhere and we weren't drunk or under the influence of anything.
clampy4x4 0
FML? No. You being a dumbass? Yes.
SPcamert 0
Sounds like you had a really good St. Patrick's day! ;)
kat0ria 0
... Um. Did you have too much to drink? o.o
jadedwolv 0
If it makes you feel any better the same thing happened to me except the cops found my car the next day.
jadedinjuly 0
st. patty's day will do that to ya!
cynnamon 0
You should of told the detective to look for your missing brain.
t3_fml 0
lmao i'm sry but thats too jokes but hey the car is longer missing
bigbadnews122 0
It's called the panic button you should hit that sometime before you call the cops!