Today, I found out that when you kick another man in the snowglobes and he smiles at you, there's something creepily wrong. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I learned that my neighbor of 9 years has a kid. I learned this after I knocked down his snowman. FML
Today, I made my first snowman ever, and then cried when my big brother kicked it to pieces. I'm 27. FML
Today, I had no choice but to shake the hand of a customer who, just moments before, had the aforementioned hand down the front of his pants, scratching his snowglobes. FML
Today, a creep called me out in the street and asked me why I was in that part of that street, because he "knows " I live in another part of the street, and he found it "odd" that I was there. He was smiling all that time too. FML
Today, as I was walking home, I passed some little girls who threw a bunch of snowballs at me. I dodged every single one, ran away laughing, and gave them the finger. I then ran into a snowman. FML
Today, as I passed by the window that looks out on to my front yard, I saw a man out there so I ran to the kitchen to call the police. The operator asked me to describe the man. It was then that I realized the mysterious man in my yard was the snowman I built yesterday. FML
Today, I'm at my grandparents' house to help clear snow. I was making a path to the driveway by pushing the snow out of the way. I saw a big pile and went to kick it really hard. Alas, it was a step. FML
Today, I discovered that if you heckle a mime, it's possible that the mime will actually kick your ass. FML
Today, I accidentally knocked over a mall Santa on his way to meet some children. I've never had that many hate-filled eyes on me at once. FML
Today, I was at the airport. A creepy man smiled at me, so I politely smiled back. I then realized his shirt said "Smile if you take it in the ass." He then winked at me and walked off. FML
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Top comments
lindseyluvszac 4
Yes, but still, why did you kick him in the first place?
gunmania0 12
it's pleasurable!
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Comments (206)
im_bored_tired 12
my names herbert. wanna come down to my basement and get some Popsicles and maybe shoulder rubs? maybe I can get the nice paper boy from down the street to join in. you're gonna have a wonderful time that you'll never forget.
Captain0bv10us 0
Hey, I'm Fernando. I am a manwhore without a peer absorbing sex from the atmosphere
im_bored_tired 12
mine was funny. yours was just gay.
im_bored_tired 12
how did that get moderated? what the heck?!
genesisnirvana 11
18-dude wtf
reesamichelle 0
nice dp broski
fauxyhaha 0
18- What the hell ?
BIEBERSLAYER 10
if you don't read it in herberts voice it's not nearly as funny as if you did
I'madumbass 19
Nice username and profile pic. Sublime is such. a good. band. (I have only listened to Santaria, but that doesn't mean Sublime doesn't have other good songs)
gthelms92 0
it's off a tv show called family guy
chelseaaababyyy 17
holy moly ! it must be my birthday !
Captain_Obvious2_fml 6
damn name stealers....
wtfmylifedude 8
He's into that kinky stuff.
aceingit 0
kinky
im_bored_tired 12
I have a correction to your picture. the correct answer is "Justin Beiber".
Jacobt24 19
idk if it's just my iPhone but how is 16's post time at 11:52 and 18's is at 11:50?
Jacobt24 19
just ignore my last post. it went to the wrong one and after I refreshed it everything went to mormal. Sorry to be annoying. I will now thumb myself down
im_bored_tired 12
idk. my iPhone says it's 5:00 A.M. but the post says posted at 11:50.
Kev_a_Sutra 10
you have it the other way around.. ditch the iPhone.
DCFan 9
19-- What is your fascination with making fun of Justin Beiber in everything you post? It stops being funny after the 20th time. I promise. Please try something new to get some "thumbs-up".
im_bored_tired 12
that's only my second time. I still have 18 more times according to your standards.
DCFan 9
Well you better get crackin. Maybe try some that are actually funny and relevant to something on this FML... Just an idea.
Jacobt24 19
the iPhone is the best phone in the world. Well, once the iPhone 5 comes out
fauxyhaha 0
19- you sound like just another teenage guy who makes fun of Justin Bieber. that craze was long ago, so no one even really talks about him anymore.
jayslilsoulja 3
snowglobes... really? what r u five?
Kev_a_Sutra 10
i doubt a five year old would say snowglobes... well atleast he didnt say dingleberries, or "love spuds"
DCFan 9
Well you better get crackin. Maybe try some that are actually funny and relevant to something to this FML... Just an idea.
im_bored_tired 12
lmao that's a fail my fellow Dallas cowboys fan.
leeshxx 3
hehe love spuds
DinoJess 0
hey, he was just being creative by saying "snowglobes." everybody else would have said "balls," or something clichè.
rjayybabe 0
that just made my day !!!!!!!!!!
OrgasmicBunnies 9
Ooh~ Kinky. It reminds me of my last BDSM relationship. Nothing like getting hit in the balls with a caddle prod to get those love juices flowing.
DCFan 9
LMAO! Funny post AND picture!!
TheDeadlyBones 0
ummm... I think he was serious... O.o
Yellow_Fish79 11
Out of all the analogies you could have used you used "snowglobes". Jeez.
savanh_fml 0
hey that term was clever lmfao
I'madumbass 19
Yeah. I like "balls" better. "Nuts" is up for 2nd place
SirBedevere 0
Odd, I didn't know snow globes could be body parts.
beachbabe417 1
well yeah... to this guy they can be.
iraq24 2
it feels awesome :D
TalkinSmack 6
be happy he smiled and didn't boot u back!