WellShit
New Richland, United States
Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
secretsmakefriends
Vashon, United States
Today, my grandmother called me in a fit of panic because her new neighbors are black. So is my fiancé, whom she is supposed to meet tomorrow. FML
Anonymous
St Louis, United States
Chill out
Today, I found out one of my "friends" is “scared” to talk to me because I’m black. FML
Boyufd
They're not real
Today, my girlfriend, KNOWING I have severe arachnophobia, changed the wallpapers on my phone and tablet to pictures of tarantulas, all because she's mad at me. And she won't change it back. FML
MyNameIsNotJeff
United States
Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML
milk plz
Pranks are shit
Today, my wife got me back for hiding a realistic tarantula replica in her underwear drawer. She ground up hot peppers and horseradish and shoved it in my mouth while I slept. I woke up screaming in pain and went to the hospital before she confessed. FML
Allergic
United States
Today, I found out that my wife purposely eats peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to get out of kissing me. I'm deathly allergic to peanuts. FML
Anonymous
No future
Today, I had no idea my girlfriend had such a poor sense of humour until I pranked her by hiding a plastic spider in the kitchen, and she broke up with me and asked me to move out. She’s not even arachnophobic, so I don’t get her extreme reaction. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I saw a spider in my bathtub, so instead of killing it, i decided to bring my dog inside the bathroom to kill the spider for me. Turns out that the spider was a black widow, and my dog was bit. The dog killed the spider. The spider killed my dog. FML
Justin
Awwww, how sweet!
Today, after having a 3-day vacation and feeling a bit bummed that it was over, I got home to find a black widow watching her babies hatch in my office window. FML
logansowow
Today, I found out that my wife is seeing a marriage counselor. With her ex. FML
Top comments
Googolman 29
I wonder how much she hates black spiders.
skroal 7
You just found this out after marrying her..?
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Comments (40)
timboober 1
Well look on the bright side... At least you won't catch her cheating on you with a black man.
Dusty_Busters 15
Haha yea
anythingmustbe 18
She must have hated spider man 3.
Persephon3 9
Who didn't?
xsarax_fml 10
did you guys not pass up a black person while dating? i mean call me stupid but that's something you would know about someone before committing your life to them.
TheFirstSamurai 18
The FML took a really dark unexpected twist.
TheFirstSamurai 18
Before I get slayed for making this comment, I'd just like to mention I'm black myself and I do find his wife's racism disgusting I just thought I could add a little levity to this situation.
charvisioku 22
I laughed. If people are gonna take offence to that, there's no hope for humanity's sense of humour to be honest.
waterkins 7
At least you aren't black... Are you?
PrayforMojo911 2
You saw Django Unchained with her, didn't you.
tj5810 21
I hope you're neither a spider nor black. :/ Your wife needs some counseling or something. That's just not right.
Homer1975 14
frist of all, you should have respect your wife. and protect her in you guys marriage.
TheFirstSamurai 18
Do you know what this FML is about?
greatdanen 6
protect her from the black rapists! White ones are welcome...
vencku 13
So what's second? I feel like something is missing if you start with "first of all" and then don't add anything more.
OfficialJSmooth 8
****** loving powers... Activate!!! I know one thing she'll really hate. Black Widows...
fudgeimout 2
My curiosity in all of this grows. How do you not realise that? How did you even find out? Why is she like that? Surround her with wonderful black people. This fml escalated quickly to the point.
vencku 13
Why is everyone asking how OP could have missed that? You don't go around asking people how they feel about other races. And if you live in a predominantly white neighbourhood, you don't see any black people either to assess your partner's reaction to them.