WellShit
New Richland, United States
Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
secretsmakefriends
Vashon, United States
Today, my grandmother called me in a fit of panic because her new neighbors are black. So is my fiancé, whom she is supposed to meet tomorrow. FML
Anonymous
St Louis, United States
Chill out
Today, I found out one of my "friends" is “scared” to talk to me because I’m black. FML
Boyufd
They're not real
Today, my girlfriend, KNOWING I have severe arachnophobia, changed the wallpapers on my phone and tablet to pictures of tarantulas, all because she's mad at me. And she won't change it back. FML
MyNameIsNotJeff
United States
Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML
milk plz
Pranks are shit
Today, my wife got me back for hiding a realistic tarantula replica in her underwear drawer. She ground up hot peppers and horseradish and shoved it in my mouth while I slept. I woke up screaming in pain and went to the hospital before she confessed. FML
Allergic
United States
Today, I found out that my wife purposely eats peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to get out of kissing me. I'm deathly allergic to peanuts. FML
Anonymous
No future
Today, I had no idea my girlfriend had such a poor sense of humour until I pranked her by hiding a plastic spider in the kitchen, and she broke up with me and asked me to move out. She’s not even arachnophobic, so I don’t get her extreme reaction. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I saw a spider in my bathtub, so instead of killing it, i decided to bring my dog inside the bathroom to kill the spider for me. Turns out that the spider was a black widow, and my dog was bit. The dog killed the spider. The spider killed my dog. FML
Justin
Awwww, how sweet!
Today, after having a 3-day vacation and feeling a bit bummed that it was over, I got home to find a black widow watching her babies hatch in my office window. FML
logansowow
Today, I found out that my wife is seeing a marriage counselor. With her ex. FML
Top comments
Googolman 29
I wonder how much she hates black spiders.
skroal 7
You just found this out after marrying her..?
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Comments (40)
Lastking85 6
Too Late.
Vallion 5
ydi for marrying an idiot.
charvisioku 22
How on earth could you not have known such an important thing before you married her? Was it one of those weird Vegas weddings people apparently get into after 2 weeks together or something? O.o
florido_fml 10
No one likes blacks
MaxG123 8
I don't get why people are still racist! I was brought up to treat everyone equally, no matter what.
TheBadAndGnarly 19
There could be a reason as to why she hates them, I mean she may have been assaulted, mugged, raped or something similar. Either that or she is just a racist idiot. In either case maybe talk to her about it.
quantumFytr93 8
Dude I hope you're not black...
gpalife 3
She better get used to both of them because they're not going anywhere
Mauskau 35
Let's just hope you have no black relatives otherwise things will be very difficult when they meet her.
notabarbie 2
how can you marry someone and not even know them at all??? knowing someone is racist is like basic knowledge of them & is a really important factor don’t you think?