Miscellaneous: Today, I found out that "going for a meal and going out clubbing"... - FML

By stonesober - 31/12/2009 01:32 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that "going for a meal and going out clubbing" for New Year's means me cooking for my mates and driving them to the pub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 743

You deserved it 3 561

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Same thing different taste

By 20 - 31/12/2009 00:28 - Australia

Today, after buying over $300 worth of food and alcohol, I found out all my friends aren't coming to my New Years party but headed to the BIG party at the local club. The one which I sold my ticket to after my friends convinced me to throw a party instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 081

You deserved it 3 115

Thanks, I hate it

By Anonymous - 11/12/2009 16:52 - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my friends and I went to our favorite pub to celebrate. As I'm a little broke at the moment, they all offered to buy me birthday drinks. Which I later learned meant that they would order them for me and bring them to the table, but put everything on my tab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 537

You deserved it 2 916

By jailey - 26/07/2016 02:26

Today, my friend decided that we should go clubbing together to "catch up". Her version of catching up is me standing beside her making out with some random dude in the parking lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 638

You deserved it 1 289

By Alana - 01/01/2011 05:27 - Australia

Today, I went to a New Year's party with my boyfriend. Later into the night, he got drunk, and left me there to go to another party with his friends. I have no car, and no way to get home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 712

You deserved it 3 600

By constantine - 29/08/2010 04:47 - United States

Today, I wanted to go clubbing with my friends. I started drinking at home to save on the price of drinks, instead I fell asleep on my couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 561

You deserved it 36 130

By nobffs - 01/01/2010 06:10 - United States

Today, my sister-in-law asked why I wasn't out partying with my friends to celebrate the new year. My mom then asked "What friends?". Ah, the new year begins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 464

You deserved it 2 965

Happy New Year!

By Anonymous - 01/01/2021 11:01

Today, my New Year’s Eve consisted of four things: being home alone, drinking cheap alcohol out of a tooth mug, getting an upset stomach from that, then going to bed early with ear plugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 716

You deserved it 231

By happy bday - 17/09/2010 04:02 - Canada

Today, is my 21st birthday. My friends took me to a bar to celebrate, knowing I don't drink. I am now in charge of driving my friends home after they had an awesome night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 993

You deserved it 9 388

It's a trap!

By Anonymous - 21/07/2023 12:00

Today, I agreed to go to a restaurant because I hadn’t really been listening and thought everyone was planning a coworkers night out. It wasn’t until the guy who had invited me turned up at the restaurant in a suit that I realised it wasn’t a group event, I’d accidentally agreed to a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 189

You deserved it 1 029

Take the L

By Anonymous - 01/01/2022 04:58 - United States - Chester

Today, it's both my 28th birthday and New Year’s Eve. Even though it's a Friday, tonight’s big plans are frozen pizza and going to bed early. I live with my parents and even they are going out tonight, leaving me to watch the dog. Happy Birthday, loser! FML

I agree, your life sucks 993

You deserved it 272

Next

Top comments

Pipistrello_fml 0

Thursday 31 December 2009 9:19

Pubes in the food.

Lisimal 7

Thursday 31 December 2009 9:15

I say you put shit on their meal. As a way of expressing their shitty friendship. SPECIAL ingredient, oh yeah. Gigity!

Comments

Ducati45 0

Thursday 31 December 2009 15:11

everybody's got to be deso sometime, but couldn't they cab it?

Bertha5 0

Thursday 31 December 2009 16:31

r u from australiia?

Suxx_To_Be_Me 0

Thursday 31 December 2009 17:54

yeah sounds familiar. I had a guy ask me out to a New Years event and dinner. he showed up with 2 uncooked pork chops and thought it would be a great idea for me to cook them. He also said that we should just drink water at the event because drinks were too expensive. I bought my own and left him in my dust as soon as we got there.

jonnymohio 2

Thursday 31 December 2009 18:05

YDI for being a pushover. Get some balls and say NO.

sparxva 12

Thursday 31 December 2009 18:39

Put on your big girl pants and learn to say 'no' - as in "no FML for you" ya big wussy.

lukascepanovic 0

Friday 1 January 2010 7:25

YDI, for being a pussy and not saying NO

somuchjustice 0

Friday 1 January 2010 9:56

lrn2takeout

Jackieeee93 0

Saturday 2 January 2010 7:15

you know what that means! ur a good cook lol what a turnon lol

therealdavid 0

Monday 12 April 2010 8:17

clearly your Australian "mate"

Horsempeg 25

Wednesday 22 May 2013 23:22

Everyone has to be DD sometime though!

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The Top

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend for cheating on me. I refused his calls, so he texted, not to apologize, but to say I'd "left some clothes in his suitcase"; i.e., he stole some of my clothes. When he didn't get the response from me that he was hoping for, he texted, "I'm wearing your shorts." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 043

You deserved it 120

Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 409

You deserved it 2 826

The Top

Today, I was on a date, and I tried breaking the ice by telling him my best joke. He laughed hysterically for a good 10 seconds, started beating the table with his fist, then suddenly went deadpan and said, "No, seriously, you're a moron. Screw this date." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 177

You deserved it 3 263

Today, my boyfriend asked me how women could urinate with a tampon in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 991

You deserved it 8 222

Today, I returned from my year-long vacation to Brazil, having lost a lot of weight and feeling better about my self-confidence. When I met my uncle at the airport, I greeted him with a friendly hug. I was greeted by his erection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 807

You deserved it 222

Today, this guy who likes me accused me of cutting myself. I asked him what he was talking about, and he said, "Don't lie, I saw those scars on your thighs when we went swimming." I have stretch marks on my inner thighs, and now I have to explain them to him so he doesn't think I cut myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 368

You deserved it 3 299

Today, during a snowstorm, I opened my car door to get out. The wind snapped it wide open, then immediately changed course and swung it back at me just as I stepped out, spilling an entire hot cup of coffee all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 267

You deserved it 4 367

Today, I went on a first date with my crush. Right before the date, I noticed a monstrous pimple in the middle of my forehead. I covered it with make-up, but it was still visible. The guy spent the whole evening laughing at me and telling me that I look like an unicorn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 916

You deserved it 2 186