Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my best friend told me he masturbates to my Instagram page. Thanks, I guess. FML
Today, I read some funny scribblings on a wall in the bathroom stall. My first instinct was to "Like" it. FML
Today, I took a picture in front of my bathroom mirror and posted it on Facebook. When I checked it later, it had 20 comments on the picture. I was feeling good until I read the comments and looked at the picture again. I'd left my vibrator on the the bathroom counter. FML
Today, while I was showering, someone left a note on the bathroom door that read, "We can all hear you masturbating. Shut the hell up." I don't know what's more embarrassing, that everyone in my house thought I was masturbating or that I was actually singing. FML
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
Today, I found a note on my door that said, "You're the sexiest person I've ever stalked." Later, I found another note that said, "Sorry, that was meant for your roommate. You aren't my type." Not even a creepy stalker thinks I'm attractive. FML
Today, I logged onto Facebook to see one of my "friends" had used my account to post a coming-out story. It had comments on it such as "I knew it!" "Finally." and "That explains so much." FML
Today, I decided to do naked yoga in my lounge room, as I always do. Later, I found a note on my front door saying "Keep doing what you're doing". FML
Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML
Today, I found a note on the front door of my flat saying, "You left your keys in your garage door so I put them in your letter box". Guess where my letter box key is. FML
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Top comments
LlamaFlavoured 24
Someone's got a stalker...
RecklessJellyBea 7
Ah, FB. A stalker's library.
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Comments (189)
jaff23 11
deactivate for a few days and he might move on or sneak a camera into your room
Mx_Rider 6
Just block your photos, try to make your profile more private if you can. Also unfriend random people you dont know or talk to.
Btagoc 2
That's like 70% of everyone on my fb...
xxkimmyt 9
Creeper Status!
xcdog16 0
Sssssssssss
yswt 12
Think positively, you are attractive!
perdix 31
I wonder what he used to attach the note to your door? I have the feeling he's going to poke you ;)
palmergoesbig 0
Probably tape.
perdix 31
Read the story and use your imagination. C'mon, man!
perdix 31
17, see what 21 did there?
daminantion 14
Try hard enough there perdix?
Renee_Ketchum 0
I just looked, and this has 6 likes on Facebook. Some sort of Inception, I guess.
kimmiekimmiekong 0
I feel like this is just a sick joke since it was attached to ur door and if not narrow it down to people who know where u live! unless u put ur address on fb and if u did ur a idiot!
salvationsanctua 5
she probably lives in a college dorm
kemando 22
It could be a locker door.
nikbush 0
"you're *an* idiot."
kemando 22
Well at least your hot, I guess.
chels1994 11
At least you're attractive :p
perdix 31
Chels, you are spectacular! When you fish for compliments, sometimes you catch the big one.
chels1994 11
Ahh perdix. I've only been a member on here for a short time, but I can't help but notice what a wonderful commenter you are :)
irimalovecheer98 5
Thts creepy but tht means your not ugly