Miscellaneous: Today, I finally decided to do something productive and clean...

By vee2013 - 26/04/2014 04:22 - Canada - London

Today, I finally decided to do something productive and clean my room. When I went to pick up the first thing off my floor, I hit my head on my desk and gave myself a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 219

You deserved it 6 933

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Same thing different taste

By myheadhurts - 12/11/2013 02:14 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I got a concussion. It was when an entire shelf of bicycle helmets tumbled onto my skull. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 126

You deserved it 3 139

By lalalalainie - 13/10/2012 06:45 - United States - Fullerton

Today, just for old time's sake, I decided to jump on my bed. I ended up hitting my head on the spinning fan and knocking myself unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 754

You deserved it 35 463

Make it stop!

By DBR - 23/04/2009 10:45 - United States

Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 904

You deserved it 11 479

Accidents will happen

By Anonymous - 27/04/2009 05:58 - United States

Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 023

You deserved it 9 313

Cool moves

By UUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGHHHH - 09/11/2022 22:00

Today, I tried to open my water bottle, which is like trying to open a pickle jar, and after several seconds, it exploded all over my desk and clothes. Then, when I was going to get paper towels and a change of clothes, I slipped on the puddle and hit my head on my desk as I came crashing down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 779

You deserved it 191

By singing

By Ramb0 - 21/12/2019 01:00 - United Kingdom - Christchurch

Today, I was headbanging so hard to a song in the shower that I hit my head on the wall and got a concussion. I'm now in hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 783

You deserved it 2 183

By iltdtsm - 15/08/2009 16:58 - Canada

Today, while showering I slipped and fell, taking down the shower curtain and smashing my head against the floor, resulting in a concussion. My family came running because of the noise and I lay naked, bleeding and concussed for few minutes before they could stop laughing enough to get me help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 229

You deserved it 3 267

By Anonymous - 10/01/2017 14:30

Today, I was in the kitchen with my mother putting up the dishes. I went to stand up from putting a pot in a lower cabinet and hit my head on the upper cabinet she left open by accident. Hello concussion number nine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 762

You deserved it 963

By Ihatecleaning - 14/01/2017 12:00

Today, I found out from the doctor that I have a concussion. Was it from a wicked sports injury? No, my idiot brother decided to judo kick the door open while I was on the floor vacuuming the front carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 294

You deserved it 549

By LacrosseFAIL - 16/07/2016 22:33 - United States - Schaumburg

Today, after a long day at work, I walked into my room with the lights off and jumped on my bed. At least I would've if I haven't rearranged my room and instead face-planted onto my desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 103

You deserved it 4 815

Kamon97 23

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:08

You had one job!

newzealand 28

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:12

I wish I had such excuses against cleaning my room... Or was this your plan all along? Cunning, I like it!

Comments

Kamon97 23

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:08

You had one job!

cumberbunny 17

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:17

Bad luck Brian.

glabberfasted 16

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:26

7 - Briana* OP is a girl :)

JMichael 25

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:47

And it wasn't cleaning her room.

jazzmin1997 16

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:09

You tried *star*

energizerbunny23 18

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:11

It's a sign you should clean your room another day

swaggalikethat 22

Saturday 26 April 2014 19:48

No, that's a sign you should never clean your room

LuluRichards 20

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:11

Well you tried, many have walked the path of productive-room-tidying, and many have failed...

newzealand 28

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:12

I wish I had such excuses against cleaning my room... Or was this your plan all along? Cunning, I like it!

Tbearshy 16

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:16

Lazy sub conscious

mattybstacks 8

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:18

On the bright side, you don't have to clean your room anymore.

daydreamer244 13

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:23

Sounds like something I would do....being clumsy sucks....I feel ya OP.

Mynamewontfi 40

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:27

Bringing laziness to a new level. Good job, OP.

Vanshikap 24

Saturday 26 April 2014 13:31

Haha. OP its a sign. ur room doesn't want to be cleaned. give up now,before you get hurt worse.

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The Top

Today, I went to an escape room on a date. I was convinced I’d be the puzzle-solving hero, so I sprinted ahead… straight into a low-hanging laser sensor that set off alarms and locked every door. We had to be rescued by staff, and my date still hasn’t talked to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 106

You deserved it 644

Today, my friend got pulled over. The cops searched the car and found a bong among the stuff we were moving to her new house. When they confronted her with it, she told them it must be mine, and that she'd never seen it before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 615

You deserved it 2 798

The Top

Today, a customer has been tanking my business online, claiming I’m a fraud and stole her money. She ordered a painted copy of one of her wedding photos and was mad she couldn’t pick it up that same afternoon. Do you have any idea how long portraits take to paint? Longer than two hours I can tell you. FML

I agree, your life sucks 513

You deserved it 56

Today, I bailed my brother out of jail for violating a restraining order filed against him by his ex. I dropped him off at the place he told me he was staying at. Turned out it was his ex's house, and now he's in jail again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 151

You deserved it 3 567

Today, I uploaded what I thought were beautiful selfies. One of my "friends" commented, "I've seen what your whole body looks like, so that's why you take only headshots. You're not fooling anybody, fatty." His comment got 18 likes. I took down the photos and spent the rest of my afternoon in tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 303

You deserved it 245

Today, I spent nearly an hour trying to take a decent photo for my dating site profile. Not 20 minutes after uploading it, I got a message saying "Srsly dude stop trying, u look like Rosie O'Donnell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 041

You deserved it 2 469

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks basically threatened to kill herself if I don't start thinking about having a child with her soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 197

You deserved it 6 856

Today, I was teaching a small group of improv students. I asked one guy to do a monologue, and laughed to myself while he did so. I said, "Sorry, I'm just laughing at the way you're doing it." He then got upset and pointed out that he had a speech impediment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 695

You deserved it 2 415