By ugh - 03/09/2013 23:53 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML
I agree, your life sucks 25 763
You deserved it 40 899

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Misaki18 17
HeyHeyFishFillet 34

Rule of life #562...Always make sure you're alone before you act like a complete weirdo.

Comments

Are you bonos mom? *hopes someone gets my South Park reference*

Bob_Mooky 9

Lol I love that episode. I didn't expect Bono to actually BE the biggest crap O_O

Haha, one of my favorite episodes. :) OP, it sucks that your mom was there to hear you. I know we've all done random shit when we think no one is around, and it's so embarrassing to get caught. FYL, you just did something that's human nature, no worries. :)

So... Did she scare the shit out if you then?

Misaki18 17

OP should have said "no, but you can help me come up with a name!"

"It's a bit early to start imposing roles on it."

Little4Bear 10

OP gave birth to a piece of shit.

HeyHeyFishFillet 34

Rule of life #562...Always make sure you're alone before you act like a complete weirdo.

I dont think there should be any rules to life. If you want to make noises while pushing out your turd baby from your asshole, you have my full support

Mister_Triangle 21

And the moral of the story? Slow and steady wins the... Wait, I ****** that up.

Mister_Triangle 21

And the moral of the story? Slow and steady wins the... Wait, I ****** that up.

A mom that cares aww great grandchildren story later on

33- Huh. A double post. Been a while since I've seen one of you.

"Yes, your first grandchild has no face! Or arms or legs! Hurry! What do I do??" That oughta do it.

Little4Bear 10

I really want to know if you're male, that will make this so much funnier.

CptnHowdyy 13

Of course OP is a male. We don't poop.

You must be able to entertain yourself for hours lol

Bob_Mooky 9

Jeezus, don't push too hard. You'll give yourself a hemorrhoid.

martin8337 35

Take me too the hospital lady, gonna poo out a baby, pow pow pow! Have a sandwich, make a baby, have a pizza a make another three!

For anyone who misses the reference, a)you suck and b) look up weebl - babies :D