Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML
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Top comments
By
Misaki18
| 17
Was it a boy or a girl?
By
HeyHeyFishFillet
| 34
Rule of life #562...Always make sure you're alone before you act like a complete weirdo.
COMMENTS
By
Jezzikah
| 11
Are you bonos mom? *hopes someone gets my South Park reference*
Reply
Rianokami
| 22
I got it. :)
Reply
Donnakar
| 20
Love it :)
Reply
Bob_Mooky
| 9
Lol I love that episode. I didn't expect Bono to actually BE the biggest crap O_O
Reply
Dreamcatcher1229
| 17
Haha, one of my favorite episodes. :) OP, it sucks that your mom was there to hear you. I know we've all done random shit when we think no one is around, and it's so embarrassing to get caught. FYL, you just did something that's human nature, no worries. :)
Reply
christyxbee
| 15
So... Did she scare the shit out if you then?
By
Misaki18
| 17
Was it a boy or a girl?
Reply
naznafeathers
| 22
OP should have said "no, but you can help me come up with a name!"
Reply
Calingaladha
| 21
"It's a bit early to start imposing roles on it."
Reply
Little4Bear
| 10
OP gave birth to a piece of shit.
By
HeyHeyFishFillet
| 34
Rule of life #562...Always make sure you're alone before you act like a complete weirdo.
Reply
cna1216
| 15
Shouldn't that be rule number one?
Reply
2116803
| 10
I dont think there should be any rules to life. If you want to make noises while pushing out your turd baby from your asshole, you have my full support
By
Genuine_G
| 8
There's one for the story book.
Reply
Mister_Triangle
| 21
And the moral of the story? Slow and steady wins the... Wait, I fucked that up.
Reply
Mister_Triangle
| 21
And the moral of the story? Slow and steady wins the... Wait, I fucked that up.
Reply
ifavela89
| 13
A mom that cares aww great grandchildren story later on
Reply
JtPv
| 14
33- Huh. A double post. Been a while since I've seen one of you.
By
starile
| 19
"Yes, your first grandchild has no face! Or arms or legs! Hurry! What do I do??" That oughta do it.
Reply
Little4Bear
| 10
"But it has your eyes!"
By
theBadGuy37
| 9
Congratulations!
By
IvyOswin
| 17
I really want to know if you're male, that will make this so much funnier.
Reply
CptnHowdyy
| 13
Of course OP is a male.
We don't poop.
We don't poop.
By
tyler384
| 6
You must be able to entertain yourself for hours lol
By
Bob_Mooky
| 9
Jeezus, don't push too hard. You'll give yourself a hemorrhoid.
Reply
martin8337
| 35
Or tear a spincter.
By
Fluffydemise
| 18
Take me too the hospital lady, gonna poo out a baby, pow pow pow!
Have a sandwich, make a baby, have a pizza a make another three!
Have a sandwich, make a baby, have a pizza a make another three!
Reply
Fluffydemise
| 18
For anyone who misses the reference, a)you suck and b) look up weebl - babies :D
Reply
jayceejaco
| 15
Or you just failed at being funny