By ugh - 03/09/2013 23:53 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML
I agree, your life sucks 25 750
You deserved it 40 857
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Misaki18 17

Was it a boy or a girl?

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HeyHeyFishFillet 34

Rule of life #562...Always make sure you're alone before you act like a complete weirdo.

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Jezzikah 11
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Are you bonos mom? *hopes someone gets my South Park reference*

139 11
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Rianokami 22
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I got it. :)

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Donnakar 20

Love it :)

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Bob_Mooky 9

Lol I love that episode. I didn't expect Bono to actually BE the biggest crap O_O

15 3
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Dreamcatcher1229 17
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Haha, one of my favorite episodes. :) OP, it sucks that your mom was there to hear you. I know we've all done random shit when we think no one is around, and it's so embarrassing to get caught. FYL, you just did something that's human nature, no worries. :)

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christyxbee 15
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So... Did she scare the shit out if you then?

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Misaki18 17

Was it a boy or a girl?

293 1
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naznafeathers 22
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OP should have said "no, but you can help me come up with a name!"

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Calingaladha 21
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"It's a bit early to start imposing roles on it."

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Little4Bear 10

OP gave birth to a piece of shit.

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HeyHeyFishFillet 34

Rule of life #562...Always make sure you're alone before you act like a complete weirdo.

267 1
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cna1216 15
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Shouldn't that be rule number one?

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2116803 10
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I dont think there should be any rules to life. If you want to make noises while pushing out your turd baby from your asshole, you have my full support

14 3
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Genuine_G 8
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There's one for the story book.

41 3
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Mister_Triangle 21

And the moral of the story? Slow and steady wins the... Wait, I fucked that up.

16 5
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Mister_Triangle 21

And the moral of the story? Slow and steady wins the... Wait, I fucked that up.

3 21
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ifavela89 13
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A mom that cares aww great grandchildren story later on

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JtPv 14
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33- Huh. A double post. Been a while since I've seen one of you.

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starile 19
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"Yes, your first grandchild has no face! Or arms or legs! Hurry! What do I do??" That oughta do it.

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Little4Bear 10

"But it has your eyes!"

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theBadGuy37 9

Congratulations!

29 0
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IvyOswin 17
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I really want to know if you're male, that will make this so much funnier.

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CptnHowdyy 13

Of course OP is a male. We don't poop.

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tyler384 6
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You must be able to entertain yourself for hours lol

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Bob_Mooky 9

Jeezus, don't push too hard. You'll give yourself a hemorrhoid.

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martin8337 35

Or tear a spincter.

1 4
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Fluffydemise 18
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Take me too the hospital lady, gonna poo out a baby, pow pow pow! Have a sandwich, make a baby, have a pizza a make another three!

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Fluffydemise 18
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For anyone who misses the reference, a)you suck and b) look up weebl - babies :D

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jayceejaco 15
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Or you just failed at being funny

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