Health: Today, I decided to see if electric dog collars work on human...

By zappy - 11/10/2009 04:40 - United States

Today, I decided to see if electric dog collars work on human necks. They do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 715

You deserved it 119 043

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Same thing different taste

By fml - 19/01/2011 01:49 - United States

Today, I let my dogs out, and then realized they didn't have their electric fence collars on. I ran inside to get the collars, then dashed out to put them on my dogs. I ran through the electric fence. The collars were on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 839

You deserved it 40 903

Are friends electric?

By Anonymous - 30/07/2021 12:01 - Canada - Bancroft

Today, my neighbor's dog came to visit and I tried to bring him back home like I usually do. Only this time, when I grabbed the dog's collar, they zapped him! And it zapped me! My teeth still hurt! FML

I agree, your life sucks 885

You deserved it 108

How shocking!

By Anonymous - 04/03/2018 01:30

Today, my brother thought it would be hilarious to put his dog shock collar on me to wake me in lieu of my alarm. You know how those cartoon characters look when they're electrocuted? That's exactly how I woke up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 449

You deserved it 379

By Anonymous - 02/10/2014 04:47 - United States - Olive Branch

Today, I was talking to my brother about how careless people are. Minutes later, I shocked myself with my dog's shock-collar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 913

You deserved it 35 668

By stupiddrunk - 01/03/2011 01:10 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up after a night out drinking on my sofa, with an electric dog collar around my neck, and handcuffs on my wrists. The keys were on the other side of the invisible doggy fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 026

You deserved it 39 305

By Cait - 30/01/2017 20:00 - Canada - Olds

Today, my friend figured out that if you poke my neck I scratch like a dog. She has yet to cease doing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 317

You deserved it 796

By Anonymous - 28/11/2011 23:54 - United States

Today, my dogs broke through our electric fence, one of whom managed to get his collar off. I picked it up and, without thinking, went across the fence line. I screamed like a chihuahua being run over by a bulldozer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 853

You deserved it 38 296

Itchy and Scratchy

By Anonymous - 06/04/2020 20:00 - Australia

Today, I put a collar on my dog to get rid of his fleas. Good news? He doesn't have fleas anymore. Bad news? They've moved onto the rest of my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 573

You deserved it 355

Ouch!

By Anonymous - 27/03/2012 05:52 - United States - Oklahoma City

Today, I was leaning over a fence in a pasture to get a closer look at something. Nobody warned my nuts that it was an electric fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 617

You deserved it 11 031

Bad boy

By nipped - 16/09/2009 13:24 - Australia

Today, I thought it would be fun to tease my dog by standing above her and hitting each of her paws repeatedly. My dog thought it would be fun to jump up and bite at my chest whilst I wasn't wearing a shirt. I just spent four hours in hospital getting my nipple sewn back on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 989

You deserved it 88 447

HappyCatIsHappy 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 12:12

Of course they work on human necks. And YDI for using a shock-collar. That's ******* cruel, now you know what your dog feels lik

NorskVind 1

Sunday 11 October 2009 12:31

Wait, OP. You mean to tell me that humans are capable of sustaining a current of electricity?! MADNESS.

Comments

hellokittywhore 0

Wednesday 27 January 2010 21:56

ydi for getting one it hurts you it's gonna hurt your dog too you dumbass

Haahee2 0

Tuesday 2 February 2010 4:37

W. T. F. y would u do dat????!!!!!!!

lilpanda 0

Monday 8 February 2010 6:41

YDI, 'nuff said.

frank_j14 0

Saturday 27 February 2010 3:48

idiot!!

tb15 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 0:21

To the OP, if that shock hurt enough to be an FML, then maybe you shouldn't be putting your dog through it

cmac86 23

Monday 26 April 2010 17:38

bitch got owned! bitch is meant in both senses here.

happy_animal_lov 0

Wednesday 12 May 2010 3:41

...duh?

alex0689 1

Friday 18 June 2010 6:39

my neighbor did that once too

NeSsAlOvE822 0

Friday 2 July 2010 2:56

YDI

amrik 11

Tuesday 13 July 2010 7:23

it doesn't hurt your just a wimp

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 205

You deserved it 6 457

Today, my 15 year-old son told me he had his first kiss. I told him how I was the same age when I had mine, and then I told him all kinds of wild stories about things I did in my childhood and college life. Truth is, I made them all up. I didn't get kissed till I was 24, and laid till I was 28. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 945

You deserved it 14 033

The Top

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 612

You deserved it 5 901

Today, I spent my afternoon rummaging through old jeans and other pants, due to being broke and needing cash for ramen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 285

You deserved it 5 135

Today, I finally got up the nerve to ask a girl at my school for her number. As I was typing it into my phone, she pointed out the giant booger firmly attached to my sleeve. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 187

You deserved it 2 486

Today, at my first AA meeting, my best friend thought it would be funny to burst in drunk and tell everyone that I was the champion at beer pong and that there was a party at my place after my "quitter club" ended. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 565

You deserved it 935

Today, during my weekly search through my daughter’s phone, I found out she joined a number of Facebook groups I didn’t know about. They were all about surviving toxic and abusive mothers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83

You deserved it 1 895

Today, I went on my afternoon stroll to my local park. As I reached the park a little boy was peeing in the bushes nearby. His mother called. As I walked by, he turned, still peeing, right to me. He ended up peeing on the front of my pants and on my shoes. My house is 2 miles away from the park. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 613

You deserved it 3 204