Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I went out drinking with my friends. Being safe as we were a little intoxicated, we took a taxi back. The cab driver was also drunk. FML
Today, I took a cab ride home from a bar. After a few minutes of horrible driving, I felt sick. The cab driver got so mad she locked me in the car and started driving me to the cops unless I payed her extra. Basically, I paid $120 for a five-minute cab ride. FML
Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML
Today, my friend got drunk. We tried to get him into a cab, he punched me in the face, three chavs then accosted me, accusing me of trying to mug him. I was then beaten up by said chavs and then the police charged me for being drunk and disorderly. FML
Today, I watched a drunk guy getting thrown out of a bar, then get tased on the sidewalk outside. He was our designated driver. FML
Today, I went to a bar with a close friend. She got drunk and was feeling sick, so I carried her to my car to take her to her house. Some stranger accused me of drugging her and tackled me with her in my arms. She threw up on me, and he took off running without an apology. FML
Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my friends. At the end of the night I got a cab ride home. I must have passed out because when I woke up I wasn’t at my place, but my parent’s house, which is the address on my license…120 miles away. The fare was $220. FML
Today, I was taking a taxi home after drinking too much. I started to feel sick and, not wanting to be charged the cab cleaning fee, threw up into my handbag instead. When we got to my place I then had to fish through my bag for my wallet to pay the driver. FML
Today, I got chased, threatened and assaulted by a cab driver because I wouldn't take the credit card receipt. FML
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Top comments
hotPinklipstick 24
I'm sure this is the epitome of FML. Sorry OP, at least you were trying to be responsible.
Harpy20 24
Screaming 'rape' usually stops all action.
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Comments (118)
poindexter25 5
Yeah well they will probably get most of the charges anyway
SoylentCandycorn 10
Most of the charges? If OP gets any charges it's still an FML because not only did he do nothing wrong, they attacked him.
AholeCop 11
Sorry about the misunderstanding, the other guys told me YOU attacked THEM. I'll come let you out. All kidding aside sorry to hear this happened to you.
barlos88 19
**** um, press charges, if the cab driver can confirm your story and you didn't start anything sue for assault and battery
theslyfox72 3
Seriously though good job for being responsible and calling a cab. It really does suck though that it went to that level
peopleplease 4
Sorry Op, people can be stupid, especially when drunk.
winkydog4056 16
So NOT nice of your fellow drunkens! Drunk folks never seem to have good manners.....
TADspace 30
Hopefully the cops were able to figure out you did nothing wrong.
JackStag 3
LMAO, dude wow... i feel sorry for you getting your ass kicked then being taken by the cops
OMGMAN84 0
You prolly would have been better off driving home :P
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
Yes because risking everyone's life (and getting a DUI, if you're caught) is always the better option. I knew a 7 year old who got hit in his own front yard at 6 in the afternoon a few years back by a drunk driver.
hateevryone 15
Damn! Maybe you should've called somebody to take you home.