Miscellaneous: Today, I chuckled at a "No Smoking" sign as I lit my cigarette.... - FML

By kaycie_lynn - 19/02/2010 01:11 - United States

Today, I chuckled at a "No Smoking" sign as I lit my cigarette. I bent my head down to light it and somehow managed to light my hair on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 769

You deserved it 71 588

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Same thing different taste

This is lit

By a genius - 12/02/2009 13:28 - United States

Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 906

You deserved it 60 269

Close but no cigar

By Anonymous - 23/12/2015 23:26

Today, while lighting a cigar, I set my beard on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 604

You deserved it 15 127

By RingofFire - 03/06/2016 23:23 - United States - Edenville

Today, I was standing on the patio when one of my upstairs neighbors threw a cigarette butt over the balcony. It landed on my head and burned some of my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 285

You deserved it 1 745

Smoke 'em while you can

By OuttaNowhere81 - 15/05/2009 04:05 - United States

Today, I was smoking a cigarette in my backyard while my parents were out, because I'm not allowed to smoke. While smoking, my parents came home unexpectedly. In a rush, I flicked it over the fence, and it landed in my neighbor's hair. It was still lit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 624

You deserved it 73 887

Testing, testing

By BubbaYoshi117 - 07/01/2020 20:00 - United States - Kirkland

Today, I was refilling my lighter. Afterwards, I gave it a test light. I must've spilled some fluid because my thumb caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 425

You deserved it 1 246

By crayons128 - 24/01/2011 06:13 - United States

Today, I was at a fire roasting marshmallows. When mine caught on fire, I pulled it back so I could blow out the flames. It flew off the stick, and, still flaming, landed on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 044

You deserved it 6 597

By Anonymous - 01/08/2011 04:28 - United States

Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 148

You deserved it 5 775

By anonymous - 05/02/2014 02:48 - United States

Today, due to the dry weather, my nose became dry and began to bleed so I plugged it with toilet paper and went about my business. Forgetting about it, I later went out to smoke a cigarette. Not paying attention, I lit the toilet paper on fire as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 921

You deserved it 45 085

By Anonymous - 22/01/2017 18:00

Today, I quit smoking cigarettes. While driving to work, the car in front of me flicked his out the window, flying straight into mine. It set the bottom of my seat on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 390

You deserved it 550

By Anonymous - 26/06/2012 05:44 - United States

Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 210

You deserved it 52 376

Next

Top comments

JassyJas 2

Friday 19 February 2010 9:17

Karma...is a BITCH, she always gets to you first!

BM13HC 0

Friday 19 February 2010 9:18

YDI for not obeying the sign >:(

Comments

Goople 0

Friday 19 February 2010 9:43

Winterharte, those sign are there for a reason.. its because teens need something to vandalize.

VioletRaven1 8

Wednesday 15 August 2012 23:11

I laughed at that

null_fml 11

Friday 19 February 2010 9:45

Yeah, man, it's a very apt analogy for the people who don't like you to use. Itches go away if you ignore them, but the more you scratch them the more annoying they get.

kido692 0

Friday 19 February 2010 9:48

you totally deserved it for being a nasty douche... no smoking signs are there for a reason even if it is only there as a ommon courtesy to people who do not want to breathe your carcenogenic shit or walk around smelling of ass... but since you are a douche I guess you only care about yourself...

Shokz992 0

Friday 19 February 2010 12:01

58,234

silentrevenge 2

Friday 19 February 2010 9:50

your so hot

SuiGeneris01 2

Friday 19 February 2010 9:54

ydi for being a smoker

im2good25 0

Friday 19 February 2010 9:59

what #1 said. smokers suck

p3rfect_ins4nity 0

Friday 19 February 2010 10:03

fail big time

g3rusz 6

Friday 19 February 2010 10:13

Instant karma, bitch! YDI a hundred times.

chameleon28 16

Friday 19 February 2010 10:16

well that's what u get for smoking in a NON smoking area!!!!!!!

MisterAcronym 0

Friday 19 February 2010 10:21

Now eat your karma like a good little smoker >:3

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The Top

Today, despite the fact that I'm happy and in love, my spiteful brat of a 12 year-old keeps spreading hateful and disgusting lies about my boyfriend doing unspeakable things while I'm away on business. Her dad told me he's reporting my boyfriend to the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 143

You deserved it 553

Today, I tried dyeing my hair at home to save some money. I carefully followed the instructions but when I rinsed it off, my hair turned a shocking shade of shiity neon green. Not wanting to leave the house looking like a radioactive toad, I wore a hat and hoped nobody would notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 340

The Top

Today, I told my boyfriend to stop tickling me, since I absolutely hate being tickled. He got extremely pissed at me and left the room. It took me a full five minutes to realize that I'd called him by my ex's name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 203

You deserved it 76 405

Today, I paid $5000 for a new fence in my backyard for my dogs. My dog escaped three hours after the contractor finished the fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 125

You deserved it 4 495

Today, like every other day, my mother, who I live with due to circumstances outside my control, harasses me every twenty minutes and generally treats me like her personal slave. When I dared complain, she had the audacity to tell me I’m lucky to “live a life of service.” Yeah, fuck you too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 842

You deserved it 173

Today, I had just reached in my purse without looking to grab a granola bar when my boss walked in my office. We talked for a few minutes as he kept giving me strange looks and looking at my hand. He left and I realized I hadn't taken a granola bar out, but a tampon instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 016

You deserved it 47 189

Today, my boyfriend asked me to play dead so he could have sex with my "corpse." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 032

You deserved it 7 772

Today, my dog barked for 30 minutes with me yelling for him to shut up. Guess that's how long it takes someone to steal the rims from my truck. Good dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 848

You deserved it 42 990