Love, Weird, Religion and Break-ups: Excuses, excuses

Excuses, excuses

By TJ. - 17/10/2022 10:00

Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend. Why? She had been praying and came to the conclusion that God was telling her to leave so she could meet her soul mate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 902

You deserved it 126

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Same thing different taste

By hrtbrkn - 16/07/2009 13:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me because "God told him to." What God didn't tell him was that I would check his e-mail and find all the e-mails to and from his new girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 306

You deserved it 6 202

By Afroman720 - 27/07/2015 18:55 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 760

You deserved it 2 887

By Brad - 08/03/2009 05:33 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for someone else. An hour earlier I had just gotten permission from her dad to propose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 157 353

You deserved it 7 528

By sadface - 11/08/2010 06:50 - United States

Today, I was dumped by my girlfriend due to our long distance relationship. She then agreed to date my best friend who lives in the same town as me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 392

You deserved it 3 468

By Anonymous - 22/05/2019 14:00

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she believes I "jinxed" her chances of getting the job she wanted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 748

You deserved it 139

A good excuse

By Anonymous - 21/11/2019 01:00

Today, my ex-girlfriend, who broke up with me because God said she couldn't have a boyfriend, started dating my friend... Who she always told me she didn't even like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 268

You deserved it 218

By .... - 24/12/2013 02:48 - United States - Modesto

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 061

You deserved it 3 724

Know your worth

By Anonymous - 20/05/2021 04:01

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, because I was apparently "too good" for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 86

By internetadvice - 01/04/2009 04:04 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out that she wasn't really in love with me. She got that advice from an internet survey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 415

You deserved it 8 963

By socialix - 19/04/2015 01:03 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 712

You deserved it 3 406

RichardPencil 30

Monday 17 October 2022 15:38

Thank God you didn't get stuck with that religious fanatic!

Radulf 8

Tuesday 18 October 2022 1:03

the ways of the Lord are mysteriously - but you got damned lucky and/or she already met someone else.

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 17 October 2022 15:38

Thank God you didn't get stuck with that religious fanatic!

Radulf 8

Tuesday 18 October 2022 1:03

the ways of the Lord are mysteriously - but you got damned lucky and/or she already met someone else.

wereallxmadhere 4

Thursday 20 October 2022 1:11

my money is on already met someone else based on her behavior in the days leading up to this

Earl_KarmasBitch 34

Tuesday 18 October 2022 2:56

God works in mysterious ways. The plan was obviously for your benefit, not hers.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, so… you know how sometimes girls give the weird guys a chance and it works out beautifully and they marry, have kids, and live happily ever after. Yeah, didn’t work for me. I gave the weird guy from work a chance and he asked if he could lick my armpits on the first date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 551

You deserved it 119

Today, I was upset over a recent break up. It showed while I was at work, and I made a customer sad just by looking blue. She complained to my manager. I got written up for being so depressed that I got a customer depressed too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 645

You deserved it 3 615

The Top

Today, I received the beautiful dress I'd ordered on the internet. It's a size smaller than my usual, just to encourage me to lose weight. I managed to fit into it and wear it all day, but I've now been struggling for a couple of hours to remove it without tearing it to bits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 390

You deserved it 226

Today, I was getting ready for work and I sprayed my hair to stay in place, then went to spray deodorant under my arm, but noticed that it was super sticky. No wonder my hair spray smelled like baby powder, I'd confused one product with another. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 647

Today, I grabbed a box of my favorite granola bars, the only flavor the brand makes without nuts, which I'm severely allergic to. A visit to the ER after my throat closed up told me that I'd missed the notice on the shelf, warning that they're now making them with peanuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 651

You deserved it 444

Today, I bought a kitten. I've wanted a cat for years and decided to finally buy one now that I have my own apartment. It turns out I'm allergic to cats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 885

You deserved it 10 073

Today, I found out my co-workers don't actually like me when they changed the hangout spot after accidentally inviting me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 028

You deserved it 3 838

Today, while shopping at a grocery store, I was the winner of the '1,000,000 customer of the year' award. I was surrounded with people taking pictures and everyone looking, all while I was buying adult diapers for my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 146

You deserved it 116

Excuses, excuses

Same thing different taste

A good excuse

Know your worth

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